What age to have the s.e.x. talk

[DeniseJP]

My sons (19 next week and 18 in December and "adopted son" will be 20 in May) learned about the birds and the bees when I was working at a horse farm. I had to breed stallions to mares and while they did not question that much, they were really curious where the baby horses came from 11 months later and a basic talk stemmed from there. Showing and raising rabbits at a younger age gave them more experience. I reminded them to always use protection as "you can see from the rabbits and horses, they only had sex once and they have babies. It can be the same with people."

There are books in the library that explain it at age appropriate levels - you can check with the librarian (you would not be the first person to ask and you won't be the last).

I learned about sex from horse breeding books and asked my mom about people at that point - she was horrified since I was only eight, way back in the Middle Ages.

My sons all get condoms in their Christmas stockings along with a toothbrush, safety razors, shave cream, deodorant, candies, combs and brushes... better to be safe than sorry.

Kind of like the saying about a young teen going to the pharmacy to ask for "condonmiums" (he meant condoms) and the pharmacist laughs and says one bedroom or two?

Denise

 

[MyLOVEABLES!!]

paul2641 wrote:

As a teenager boy myself. I would personally think all you need to say to your son is just don't say anything in sex ed and avoid the conversation with friends. And leave it at that. I never really had any trouble even though my mother didn't tell me the facts, You work them out yourself as you hear stuff.

ditto!

 

[Flashy]

MyLOVEABLES!! wrote:

paul2641 wrote:

As a teenager boy myself. I would personally think all you need to say to your son is just don't say anything in sex ed and avoid the conversation with friends. And leave it at that. I never really had any trouble even though my mother didn't tell me the facts, You work them out yourself as you hear stuff.

ditto!

:shock2:

You're a boy Prisca?!?!?!?!?

 

[kirst3buns]

The "American Medical Association Boys Guide to Becoming a Teen" is a good book for a 10 year old boy. I gave it to my son when he was 10 and he read it cover to cover. It doesn't give much specific information about sex but gives a lot of good information for "tween" boys. I went looking for something because I needed something to start with and I liked this book. My husband wasn't much help as he said his parents never had any talks with him and his brothers. I think talking about it is much better!

I think ongoing communication is better because then you will have a good idea when he is ready for more information. I think my son was more ready for more in depth information when he was 11-12.


http://www.amazon.com/American-Medical-Association-Guide-Becoming/dp/0787983438/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1240496714&sr=1-2

 

[irishlops]

i have a dook for girls and boys (its cut in half)
its cathoilic and says about marriagw=e and explains "big" words..
ill get the title after school

 

[pinksalamander]

I never had a 'talk'. Infact my Mum attempted to when I was about 12 and her opening line was 'do you know about willies and stuff?' which pretty much quashed the conversation, and she never attempted again.

I don't know how important it is to have a talk really. I know people say you should tell your children so they don't end up getting the wrong ideas from their friends, but I learnt everything from friends/the playground and I turned out alright!

 

[Mrs. PBJ]

Another thing about making your kids comfertable with talking to you is if god for bid someone does something to them there more likly to tell you.

I know for a fact when I was in middle school we had a weird teacher I told my mom right away. But none of the other kids said anything I asked them why and they said that kind of stuff was not talked about.

Open line of communitcaition can be more then just questions. I know it happened to me for 5 years.As soon as my mom adopted me and we had the firt talk I spilled the beans cause I was comfertable takling to her about it. Caus she made it a known subject

 

[paul2641]

MyLOVEABLES!! wrote:

paul2641 wrote:

As a teenager boy myself. I would personally think all you need to say to your son is just don't say anything in sex ed and avoid the conversation with friends. And leave it at that. I never really had any trouble even though my mother didn't tell me the facts, You work them out yourself as you hear stuff.

ditto!

Thankfully someone agrees.

 

[kherrmann3]

I don't know when the "right" age to tell a kid is, but our school had "human growth and development courses" when I was little. I remember having the classes in fourth grade for sure, maybe even younger.