RIP Ollie :,( you were the most special bun I ever met

[olliefolyfe]

He certainly sounded like a special little guy and you must be heartbroken he's gone so quickly. I think our first reaction when we lose a beloved pet for a better word, I mean they are so much more; friend, companion, shoulder to cry on, sounding board, family and so much more. We get so used to them being there we forget their lives are so much shorter than ours. Makes me think of the film The Green Mile where Paul Edgecomb the tom hanks character looks back and says that it's hard knowing that you will have to say goodbye to everyone you love as they will all go before you and that's his curse...love that film by the way. Anyway what I'm trying to say in a bit of a long winded way is we all will probably have to say goodbye to pets we adore and even though we know it will happen it's always far too soon. That's why now I take loads of photos and videos of my boys and they will always be there when I want to spend time with them. After my little dog who I had for 17 years I said never again and here I am with my three boys. We never know when another furry bundle is going to make us change our mind, only you can decide that. I hope you feel that some day you will see another little bun who will steal your heart.

That is very true and I tried to pretend that Ollie was different & he'd live forever. I think I subconsciously knew this could happen though because I always tried to take as many videos and pictures as I could to try and capture every aspect of him and his cuteness. (Kind of like what you do w/ your little guys!) I love that movie too and that is such a wonderful quote. I just need to realize death is a part of life and one of the aspects of life we have no control over. It just hurts me that I wasn't there for his final moment and that he thought I just gave him away when I reality I was coming back for him and had been looking forward to it from the moment we separated :,( I hope I do get nother bun someday! But it will be hard because NOTHING (not even another person) could compare to my bond/love w/ Ollie. I am trying to stay positive though and I really appreciate your reply!

 

[lovelops]

Stephanie,

(first off my keyboard is messed up.. and leaving off letters... so please excuse any typos... and that goes for anyone else reading this...)

Anytime you get back in the state and feel like getting together is fine with me. I'll send you my details in a PM..
And PLEASE do not feel that way about Ollie and thinking he was thinking this or that or the other. He was probably thinking
Oh boy, I get to stay with mom's friend and get away with murder and get to eat treats she won't give me! And you *were* there for him. There's a couple of quotes that come to mind:

“The death of someone
is like
reading a book,
yet
having it end, where it wasn't supposed to.”
― Cindy Vo Nguyen

I just about feel like that's what happened here.. or most if not all people would say the same thing, including myself about Buttons and the death of my mother... and I find the following quote is how I feel about Buttons, my mom, etc:

“Whoever said that loss gets easier with time was a liar. Here's what really happens: The spaces between the times you miss them grow longer. Then, when you do remember to miss them again, it's still with a stabbing pain to the heart. And you have guilt. Guilt because it's been too long since you missed them last.”
― Kristin O'Donnell Tubb, The 13th Sign

Those individuals that had Ollie prior probably kept him in a back room and treated him like he was a piece of furniture. You didn't. You made him an active part of your life and when you couldn't be there, your friend was as active as you with him. I mean hell, your friend took him out in a SNOW STORM we had here to get treatment. How many people would do that? Not too damn many I know. They would be flipping quarters.. Heads we go, tails.....

You made him an active part of your life and he *enjoyed it* and you've proved it with your photos you posted. Hell, you did more with him in 2 years that I did with my bunnies I've hand raised. I can't get nary a one in a harness. You would think I was trying to string them up and cook 'em! While he might have went place to place in the past, you were his perm home and he knew it.

He felt it in his heart.

He knew you were there for him even when you had to be somewhere else.
Do not doubt it.

“Because death is the only thing that could have ever kept him from you.”
― Ally Carter, Out of Sight, Out of Time

You know, and that brings me back to Chris's post which is 100% true and hits the nail on the head and reminds me of this quote:

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal.
From an Irish headstone”
― Richard Puz, The Carolinian

As we all write to you we feel sorry for you and how you feel about Ollie, it always brings back to us our own animals mortality and that is painful. I've had to deal with three buns passing the same day, Buttons in 2010, his sister the year before (Don't even get me on that one... me and you will both be singing there's a tear in my beer) my father in 2011, my mother in 2005, my aunt one month before my dad in 2011, etc..and it reminds me that every animal I see sleeping on the floor or in their cages I will at some point in the future have to say goodbye to them as well and bury them beside the others in the yard which to put it in high school terms.. sucks!

However, that is the price we pay for caring and loving.

“When he died, all things soft and beautiful and bright would be buried with him”
― Madeline Miller, The Song of Achilles

If we never put our necks on the line. If we never step out of our comfort zone, if we never open our heart to other humans and other animals and allow these little fuzzy animals no matter if they are dogs, cats, rats, guinea pigs, rabbits, sugar gliders, etc or in that case other individuals into our environment, we would never experience the joys that they bring to our lives in the time no matter how long or brief that they are with us. We would have a life less full from them not being with us and interacting and growing with us and to me that would be far more painful then the sting of not having them with us any more.

Now, my family being Southern my mother had this MORBID fascination of going to cemetaries and would drag me unwillingly with her. For some reason, she could not fathom that a teenagers idea of a good time was not visiting old Baptist cemetaries off the paved road. At this one cemetary in South Carolina was this one grave stone that every time I saw it would just PISS ME OFF. If I could go back there and kick it over I would. This was the grave stone of someone who was seriously seriously mad they were dead and I remember this clearly even though it has been over 20 years plus since I have been in that graveyard:

Remember friend as you walk by
as you are now so once was I
as I am now you soon shall be
prepare for death and follow me.

and I'm thinking NO WAY IN HELL you mean a** hole just because you died doesn't mean you have to remind everyone else
that we all are going to die also!!!!

To me this was NOT a positive tombstone with some cheery poetry, like' She is with the ages.. or she sings with the Angels' NO! This was a person that was really really mad they were dead and wanted everyone else to know they were dead, and you were going to be dead also, so get over it and start reading Checkov and get unhappy.

To the contrary, I this this sums up Ollie and is a more positive view of death :
“He Is Not Dead

I cannot say, and I will not say
That he is dead. He is just away.
With a cheery smile, and a wave of the hand,
He has wandered into an unknown land
And left us dreaming how very fair
It needs must be, since he lingers there.
And you—oh you, who the wildest yearn
For an old-time step, and the glad return,
Think of him faring on, as dear
In the love of There as the love of Here.
Think of him still as the same. I say,
He is not dead—he is just away.”
― James Whitcomb Riley

On a side note, I do love the movie Blade Runner from seeing it over and over on Betamax and what struck me was even though those *crazy* replicants raised hell in leaving from that Off world in killing 23 people was that they loved life and seemed to value it more than the humans. They hung onto their memories like a life raft. It really is funny how the future is different from how I thought it was be in the 80's when I first saw the film. Hell, I'm still waiting for the Jetsons cars!! Where are they at!!! We've been had! Also the situation about the artificial animals in the book and film: "In the book, live animals are highly priced possesions, and the rarer the better. It is also considered a moral crime not to take care of and protect an animal. If you cannot afford a live animal, or the live animal you want is extinct, then a fake one is a good alternative." (also there was the fight that Ridley Scott got into with Harrison Ford as he wanted to make Ford's character a replicant also on the same level as Rachel and Ford fought him the entire time... there is the scene where both of their eyes have that gold/red glow that the replicants eyes have, Ford has blown it off saying he stepped into Sean Youngs' lighting by accident!)

Pretty interesting!

Hang in there, watch Blade Runner and remember the good and nothing else. To remember anything else except the good times with Ollie is just you un-necessarily torturing yourself and you don't need that...we have enought people around us to do that for us. We don't need to help them out!


Vanessa

 

[olliefolyfe]

Stephanie,

(first off my keyboard is messed up.. and leaving off letters... so please excuse any typos... and that goes for anyone else reading this...)

Anytime you get back in the state and feel like getting together is fine with me. I'll send you my details in a PM..
And PLEASE do not feel that way about Ollie and thinking he was thinking this or that or the other. He was probably thinking
Oh boy, I get to stay with mom's friend and get away with murder and get to eat treats she won't give me! And you *were* there for him. There's a couple of quotes that come to mind:

“The death of someone
is like
reading a book,
yet
having it end, where it wasn't supposed to.”
― Cindy Vo Nguyen

I just about feel like that's what happened here.. or most if not all people would say the same thing, including myself about Buttons and the death of my mother... and I find the following quote is how I feel about Buttons, my mom, etc:

“Whoever said that loss gets easier with time was a liar. Here's what really happens: The spaces between the times you miss them grow longer. Then, when you do remember to miss them again, it's still with a stabbing pain to the heart. And you have guilt. Guilt because it's been too long since you missed them last.”
― Kristin O'Donnell Tubb, The 13th Sign

Those individuals that had Ollie prior probably kept him in a back room and treated him like he was a piece of furniture. You didn't. You made him an active part of your life and when you couldn't be there, your friend was as active as you with him. I mean hell, your friend took him out in a SNOW STORM we had here to get treatment. How many people would do that? Not too damn many I know. They would be flipping quarters.. Heads we go, tails.....

You made him an active part of your life and he *enjoyed it* and you've proved it with your photos you posted. Hell, you did more with him in 2 years that I did with my bunnies I've hand raised. I can't get nary a one in a harness. You would think I was trying to string them up and cook 'em! While he might have went place to place in the past, you were his perm home and he knew it.

He felt it in his heart.

He knew you were there for him even when you had to be somewhere else.
Do not doubt it.

“Because death is the only thing that could have ever kept him from you.”
― Ally Carter, Out of Sight, Out of Time

You know, and that brings me back to Chris's post which is 100% true and hits the nail on the head and reminds me of this quote:

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal.
From an Irish headstone”
― Richard Puz, The Carolinian

As we all write to you we feel sorry for you and how you feel about Ollie, it always brings back to us our own animals mortality and that is painful. I've had to deal with three buns passing the same day, Buttons in 2010, his sister the year before (Don't even get me on that one... me and you will both be singing there's a tear in my beer) my father in 2011, my mother in 2005, my aunt one month before my dad in 2011, etc..and it reminds me that every animal I see sleeping on the floor or in their cages I will at some point in the future have to say goodbye to them as well and bury them beside the others in the yard which to put it in high school terms.. sucks!

However, that is the price we pay for caring and loving.

“When he died, all things soft and beautiful and bright would be buried with him”
― Madeline Miller, The Song of Achilles

If we never put our necks on the line. If we never step out of our comfort zone, if we never open our heart to other humans and other animals and allow these little fuzzy animals no matter if they are dogs, cats, rats, guinea pigs, rabbits, sugar gliders, etc or in that case other individuals into our environment, we would never experience the joys that they bring to our lives in the time no matter how long or brief that they are with us. We would have a life less full from them not being with us and interacting and growing with us and to me that would be far more painful then the sting of not having them with us any more.

Now, my family being Southern my mother had this MORBID fascination of going to cemetaries and would drag me unwillingly with her. For some reason, she could not fathom that a teenagers idea of a good time was not visiting old Baptist cemetaries off the paved road. At this one cemetary in South Carolina was this one grave stone that every time I saw it would just PISS ME OFF. If I could go back there and kick it over I would. This was the grave stone of someone who was seriously seriously mad they were dead and I remember this clearly even though it has been over 20 years plus since I have been in that graveyard:

Remember friend as you walk by
as you are now so once was I
as I am now you soon shall be
prepare for death and follow me.

and I'm thinking NO WAY IN HELL you mean a** hole just because you died doesn't mean you have to remind everyone else
that we all are going to die also!!!!

To me this was NOT a positive tombstone with some cheery poetry, like' She is with the ages.. or she sings with the Angels' NO! This was a person that was really really mad they were dead and wanted everyone else to know they were dead, and you were going to be dead also, so get over it and start reading Checkov and get unhappy.

To the contrary, I this this sums up Ollie and is a more positive view of death :
“He Is Not Dead

I cannot say, and I will not say
That he is dead. He is just away.
With a cheery smile, and a wave of the hand,
He has wandered into an unknown land
And left us dreaming how very fair
It needs must be, since he lingers there.
And you—oh you, who the wildest yearn
For an old-time step, and the glad return,
Think of him faring on, as dear
In the love of There as the love of Here.
Think of him still as the same. I say,
He is not dead—he is just away.”
― James Whitcomb Riley

On a side note, I do love the movie Blade Runner from seeing it over and over on Betamax and what struck me was even though those *crazy* replicants raised hell in leaving from that Off world in killing 23 people was that they loved life and seemed to value it more than the humans. They hung onto their memories like a life raft. It really is funny how the future is different from how I thought it was be in the 80's when I first saw the film. Hell, I'm still waiting for the Jetsons cars!! Where are they at!!! We've been had! Also the situation about the artificial animals in the book and film: "In the book, live animals are highly priced possesions, and the rarer the better. It is also considered a moral crime not to take care of and protect an animal. If you cannot afford a live animal, or the live animal you want is extinct, then a fake one is a good alternative." (also there was the fight that Ridley Scott got into with Harrison Ford as he wanted to make Ford's character a replicant also on the same level as Rachel and Ford fought him the entire time... there is the scene where both of their eyes have that gold/red glow that the replicants eyes have, Ford has blown it off saying he stepped into Sean Youngs' lighting by accident!)

Pretty interesting!

Hang in there, watch Blade Runner and remember the good and nothing else. To remember anything else except the good times with Ollie is just you un-necessarily torturing yourself and you don't need that...we have enought people around us to do that for us. We don't need to help them out!


Vanessa

There's a couple more pics of him^^^


I'm just soo torn up that ill never see him ever again and I really do feel guilty. He and I became really close then I just handed him off. I let my friend Charlie who is a good natured hippie watch him for a couple months then my friend Josh took over until I was supposed to pick him up. (March) it was supposed to only be a month originally. Both the people who took care of him loved him very much. They both knew him well and/ or had watched him when I was out of town. He got handed to me (and spent a full year with me at 6 mo old) then my friend Charlie had him for a couple months then my friend Josh until present.
I just feel bad that he was handed around after I had him the longest and promised him I wouldn't do that. He did have a great, enjoyable life. I appreciate what you said about me doing a lot with him. I really tried to give him a good life. I just hope I didn't cause stress by making him get attached then moving away on him :,(

Those are all wonderful quotes that truly sum up how I feel and put the situation into perspective. I am also so sorry to hear about the loss of Buttons, your other buns and the loss of your aunt, mother and father. & I really appreciate you helping me think about everything with a more healthy perspective. I understand emotions being brought up and whenever I used to read the rainbow bridge announcements I'd find myself becoming emotional thinking about what I knew I had to eventually face with Ollie. I always thought I'd be there with him when he'd pass. Holding him and giving him comfort that I was HIS owner and he would have closure. & that notion gave me a bit more relief when thinking about it. But the way it happened is just so much more terrible than I thought.

Cemeteries have always put me on edge and I could understand that grave stone frustrating you! Way to make people uncomfortable ! That would disturb me a bit too. :O cemeteries can beautiful with all the trees and flowers so I can see someone else finding enjoyment in them. It's just not my thing lol!

That James Whitcomb Riley quote does put a more positive spin on the situation. I am really trying my hardest to stay positive but I keep getting so damn emotional so it's difficult to put things into a healthy perspective. It's just so surreal for me. It took awhile for me to realize its really happening. I thought he'd be at least 7 or 8 when he'd pass away. I'm totally going to watch blade runner and a lot of other great movies to try and keep positive. Thank you so much for all your kind words, and your input. it is much needed! & it has made me feel a lot better!

Stephanie

 

[lovelops]

Stephanie

I love the pics and you can tell he was so happy! That in itself should make you feel good inside he didn't pass away sitting in some animal shelter. He was with people who loved him and cared about him. Him with the shoes is precious!

Please Stop feeling guilty.

I felt intense guilt when my mother died. I kept thinking if only I had taken her to Georgetown Hospital the night before she would still be around. If only... You can't keep beating yourself up.

I know easy to say, hard to do, but it's true. You all loved him. All his caretakers. You worked out what was best.

It's much better to be around people who care then people who think you are invisable, pet or human. He was showered with love. That's all any of our pets, friends, or anyone or anything that comes into our lives needs and deserves. He got what he needed. PERIOD.

I could do the same on Buttons and the day he died I took him back into the vet and emergency vet TWICE. So if I had taken him the third time would he have lived? Maybe, but people were starting to think I was nuts. I was starting to stress him out. That wasn't my goal.

We do not live knowing our expiry date or anyone else's.

I know it would make life so much easier, but we have to deal with not knowing. Hindsight is always 20 20. Ollie had a great life, had some great caretakers, and died surrounded by love. That is all any of us want. I played the same head game you are doing now when Buttons died, my other buns died, and my mother. Don't do it, and don't go there. We are masters of messing up our own minds. Shake it off, remember the good, and try to function. I know it's hard. It's not easy. It hurts.. but try.

“If, as a culture, we don’t bear witness to grief, the burden of loss is placed entirely upon the bereaved, while the rest of us avert our eyes and wait for those in mourning to stop being sad, to let go, to move on, to cheer up. And if they don’t — if they have loved too deeply, if they do wake each morning thinking, I cannot continue to live — well, then we pathologize their pain; we call their suffering a disease.
We do not help them: we tell them that they need to get help.”
― Cheryl Strayed

Remember, life has to end, but love does not.

Life doesn't always end the way we think.

I never thought I would get a call when I was at work that my mother died. That was not in my plans. I pictured her in a white fluffy bed surrounded by those who loved her, not hospital workers trying to bring her out of a code blue.
That's not the way I pictured her going.

I never thought I would be the last one at the hospital bed telling them it was
time to take her to the morgue. That was *not* a scene I was prepared for at all. Life and death come and go in very different ways then we ever imagine. There is no dress rehearsal for it. If there were it would be so much easier, but
there isn't. There is never a convenient time to say good bye to anyone or anything. Everything happens so much quicker, and is much more unexpected then we ever imagine. We are always off guard even though we know we have no guarantee of tomorrow. We just expect it to come and when it doesn't we are shocked.

No graveyards are NOT my thing and I don't visit my mom much to this day but I told her that before she ever died.
"Don't think I'm going to be bringing my ass to sit around some graveyard like you do." I told her. She just smiled and laughed. Graveyards are for the dead, not the living.

Riley really had a nice idea about death, and I liked the analogy about them going to a far off land:

With a cheery smile, and a wave of the hand,
He has wandered into an unknown land
And left us dreaming how very fair
It needs must be, since he lingers there.

You know, I had always gotten into trouble at school and always raised questions that could never be answered.
But I asked in the religious schools I went to (and got thrown out of) If God so loved the world, how can he stand
it when even one think he created died?

Wouldn't the pain bother him horribly? How can he stand it day in and day
out with wars and fighting, and murders? Of course no one had an answer. I mean the
pain from Buttons still hurts from 2010. You know how you feel about Ollie. That magnified from
seeing all, feeling all and knowing all that die daily??

I've never seen anything addressing about God's pain over anything's death only that he could not
stand to see Elijah and Enoch die. (Genesis 5:24, Second Kings 2:11) and he let the devil mess with
Job but not enough to kill him (which was really sweet... not) Really? So everyone and
everything else is chopped liver and these two don't deserve death? I always had problems with that.
Maybe he'll strike me dead some day, but until that day comes, that seems a bit unfair. IF it's good
for one it's good for all. Either all die or none die. (That reminds me of the Kang and Kodos Simpsons Episode Treehouse of Horror 7 when they were running for a political office with their abortions for all, abortions for none line)

Kang: (as Dole) Fooling these Earth voters is easier than expected.
Kodos: (as Clinton) Yes. All they want to hear are bland pleasantries embellished by an occasional saxophone solo or infant kiss.
Kang: (as Bob Dole) Abortions for all!
(Crowd boos)
Kang: Very well, no abortions for anyone!
(Crowd boos again)
Kang: Hmm... Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others!
(Crowd cheers and waves miniature flags.)

No God's favorates don't die, but Jesus and the rest of us...nah..Eternal life for some, death for others! Nah!

Another thing is the issue of pets /animals in heaven. I can tell you, I've never hung around Jesus or God, but I sure have with dogs, cats, rabbits and hamsters. If they aint' going to be there, I'm going to have to reconsider eternity, no matter how stupid that sounds. Stone me now..

I'm going to order the new edition that came out of Blade Runner. I think my Betamax days are gone, and I can't find the copy I had in my DVD library! OH well, there are worse things that could happen. I could die tomorrow!

Vanessa