Returning a rescue

[Megamuffinandchip]

What you decide to do is your choice. Nobody else's. No one on here knows you, knows your life, knows your struggles and difficulties, so they can't truly see what is going to be the best thing for you. This is a forum and everyone on here is just stating an opinion. And that's all it is, an opinion. Not what you should do, not what's the right thing for you. Set the guilt aside, you have nothing to feel guilty about, and there's nothing you should be beating yourself up over. This is the normal process in finding a potential companion for a single bun. Except for the not being able to pick the potential bunny companion. Normally you should have a say as to which bun you want to bring home.

The fact that you weren't able to actually choose which bun seemed the best fit for you, as well as being the right fit for your girl bun, makes it a more difficult situation, and one there is no reason for you to feel bad about. You got him to be able to be a companion for your bun, and if that bond isn't working then the situation can't and shouldn't be forced. That's part of the reason to go to a shelter or rescue in the first place when trying to find a companion for your rabbit. So that you will be able to make the right match.

If he's not feeling like the right match, see what other buns they have that could be. If you aren't sure yet, then no harm in giving it a few more weeks. But one thing, I would suggest is trying a different approach for you. Don't worry about trying to make a connection with him, that's not so important right now. Just do the essential care, and keep your energy focused on finding out whether or not he can be a good companion for your girl. But it can take some patience at the start. Keep in mind that a bit of chasing, humping, and nipping(but not actual fighting) can all be a normal part of the bonding process and is not at all a reflection of what their final bond can end up being. It's a normal part of rabbits sorting out hierarchy. Once that gets all sorted out, you could have two buns that end up totally adoring each other. And if that happens, I think then you could learn to love him too.

But if the bonding process isn't going well and they don't seem the right fit, then it's a kindness to return him so that your bun can find a companion she is happy with, and that he can also go to a home and possibly be bonded to a bun he will adore and be happy with as well.

Thank you JBun, I think you've given me advise in the past and I apreciate it greatly. So I tried talking to the rescue more and it definatly didn't go very well... They generally seem like a streange place now that I think about it and I am not a very good person at advocating for things or putting my foot down. I should have realized that when I showed up to meet the bunnies and they instantly wanted me to take one, sign the paperwork, and give them the money that something might not be right. They not only didn't offer any help in the problems I was having, but also when I went to bring the little man back, would not meet with me at all and had me leave him in a crate outside, even though they let me in last time? I don't think it was covid related. And they never responded to any texts I sent them after that. So yeah, I am def feeling weird. I reached out to another rescue, which is actually closer, and they want me to bring Poppy with me to try and do some speed dating, so I'm not giving up and I'm going to try and find a rescue rabbit that can work for us both.

 

[cuteus]

Our first bun, Freckles, was the perfect lovey dovey guy. Loved to get petted. Hours if you had the stamina. Ran around our feet, binky, chewed cords (bad thing, of course) and was very vocal when happy and grooming. The year before he died, a mini rex (Houdini) was abandoned in the Pine Barrens and I ended up with him. Complete opposite behavior, did not want to be petted (allowing 5 min or less sessions), did not follow us around and acted more like an aloof cat than a loving bunny. He would escape his room and chase Freckles who was old and arthritic. I felt no love for the new guy, no bond and anger at his attacks on senior Freckles. We gave him the basic care and let him be and always trying to pet and comfort him. After Freckles died, the same feelings continued. Houdini did not trust humans. It took a year of longer before he began allowing more petting and longer sessions. He began charming us with his antics. He is now old and a new bun came to us that is the cutest but he is not getting enough attention from us because he is in his own room and the older has the run of the house. I feel bad, of course. Both buns are intact so they can't be together around the house. I am trying to spend more time with him but keep some emotional distance. He seems content, he plays with his beach ball all night and day. It is a different bond with each one, but bond did happened eventually, sometimes after over a year. I guess it is up to us to resist a forced bun at the right time, before it becomes a hardship.

 

[HalaBuns]

Bunny stuff aside because you have a lot of amazing advice and experiences here already, just want to send you a big hug . Sorry you’re having such a difficult time, but I hope that sharing it with us all here helps with whatever you decide and need to do x