My boyfriend is jealous of my bunny (as well as my other pets).

[ZRabbits]

You are not alone. Making big changes in life is hard, especially whenthe change affects every aspect of yourlife. Though you can't see us here, you have people who care. Talk to us, or even to me, I'll be more than glad to listen and help you through hard times like you are feeling now. Don't let the negative feelings given affect your relationshiop with your pets. They didn't bring this on, your BF did. Glad to hear Mom will help with the cigs and cutting down will help if one day you want to quit permanently.

It's always darkest before the dawn. You are not alone. Been there when it feels like your whole world has been ripped apart. Have good listening skills and am here to offer them to you. Keep strong. This will pass and you will truly be better off.

K

 

[gmas rabbit]

I agree talk to us and let us be there for you. We have all had times when the people from RO have been supportive, lose of pets, illnesses whatever. This forum is not just about rabbits. Try and find yourself a divorce or grief therapy group that can help you through this. Most churches and mental health centres actual have groups for people that have not been married but living together or in a long term relationship. Also talk to your doctor, perhaps your medical will cover some therapy sessions. If you have had a drug problem, your drug counsellor should help. There is nothing weak about asking for help. Give your animals lots of attention and pets, believe me they know that you are hurting, pretty intuitive little critters. Take one day at a time, set your goals for that day only. More than that will overwhelm you. Hugs and nose bunks.

 

[Paddy Ohara]

Do what you feel is right and also trust what your animals are telling you. If your animals are not comfortable at all times, there is something wrong and it may be when you are away. I really loved my ex-boyfriend who didn't like my animals. We have since broken it off and I am so happy about this. FRiends and family were not happy about how jealous he was and I was told they (the animals) always come first etc...Now my sweet little old dog has behvioral problems that were related to what happened when I wasn't around. They are not real big problems but I know the source of them and I can work with them it just makes my angry and also sad that I let it get to that point. Just make yourself aware! As I look back I can see how the dislike of animals started to rub off and he also started to treat me that way when things didn't go his way-he always blamed the animals for lack of time etc... It was a struggle to take care of both and you shouldn't have to. I also feared how this behvior would translate to kids. My dog picked out my new boyfriend for me and we have been together for 7 years now-(married for 5). Just remember your animals need you to take care of them. They can't do it themselves and they deserve the best.

 

[Nela]

I was engaged for 5 years until I finally decided that I wanted better for myself. Not long after I packed his stuff and put him on a plane back to where he came from, I met my current boyfriend. I have never been happier. Sometimes things happen for a good reason, even if we cannot see it at the time. Maybe you just need the time away from each other to work on yourselves to come back stronger. I don't know, but try to keep your chin up and focus on making a good thing come out of a sucky situation. *Hugs*

 

[LakeCondo]

Best friends aren't mean & hurtful.

 

[BunnyLove89]

Thanks everyone, I really appreciate all the support.
My boyfriend and I had a really good night. Saying goodbye (even though it may only be for awhile) was hands down the hardest thing I have ever had to do.
My brother died when I was 16 and that was not as hard as this was. When someone dies you don't wonder if you're doing the right thing. When you choose to walk away from the person you love most, there's alot of doubt and wondering if you are making the biggest mistake of your life.
I thought I could distract myself from the emotional pain so earlier I opted for some good old physical pain and I got my lip pierced. Well, now my mouth is throbbing and my heart feels like it's breaking into a thousand little pieces. :sad:

 

[ZRabbits]

Change is hard. Saying goodbye does hurt. Glad for both of you that you left on good ground.

You made the step, truly know you are hurting, and it does get better in time.

Keep the faith.

And hope your lip feels better soon.

K

 

[gmas rabbit]

Hang in there, if this is meant to be you will come back stronger. Take the time to work on you and spend lots of time with your animals. Animals are very healing. Hope your lip feels better soon. hugs

 

[BunnyLove89]

This is such a weird feeling. I'm not in a very good place mentally. I didn't sleep well so i've been drinking alot of caffeine but it's not helping.
My mom had open heart surgery so my parents have been gone for 2 months. They are coming back in 9 days, but until then I am going to have no one to talk to. I won't even see anyone unless I go to the store to get groceries.
No one will even talk to me on facebook.
I have a feeling i'm going spend the next 9 days laying in bed while watching tv...
Since last night i've been tempted to tell my boyfriend that I am really sorry and ask him if we can forget the break and get back together. I miss him already.
Sorry if I come across as whiny. I've just never had to go through something like this before.

 

[MiniLopHop]

It is very hard when you feel all alone. Talk with us here. I know it doesn't feel like it now, but you made the right choice. If he really loved you he would not have been nasty about the split, that just shows his true colors.
Send me a friend request on FB and we can chat later this evening when I get home from work. Brandy Condren Anderson. I have the same avetar there as here.
*big hugs*

 

[fuzz16]

Were here for you.
If you keep busy itll help. Just somethin to get out of the house. Reading helps too. Im thankful i always had my baby to keep me to busy to worry over personal problems

 

[gmas rabbit]

Try going for a walk. Walks are good therapy. If you can take a water, not more coffee and sit somewhere that you can people watch. That makes you feel like you have someone around, but you just have to watch and not make conversation. You can get hold of me anytime, just send me a PM. It will get easier.

 

[BunnyLove89]

Well I went to Walmart to get out of the house and I was on the verge of fainting the entire time. I was dizzy, I was sweating, and the room was spinning. I looked up causes of fainting and it can be a sign of intense emotional stress.
Once again, I really appreciate all the support. I'm really glad I found this forum. Awhile back I was a member of another forum and it was a really bad experience. One of my rats chewed through the base of her cage during the night and squeezed through the bars of my male rat's cage and she got pregnant. People were attacking me saying that I was irresponsible and a bad pet owner and when I tried to defend myself I got banned and was told that I was a nuisance and a troll.
I had a friend who was also a member and when she tried to help me find homes for the babies she was told by the mods that I lost all privileges and no one was allowed to help me.
So I was a bit wary of this forum at first. I am pleasantly surprised!

 

[fuzz16]

Ditto. Just pm me. Caffeine actualy can make you depressed. Try green or black tea. Pass on carbs too they can make you depressed too. Which im sure your very upset...look at cute kitten and bunny posters. Cant help but smile at those

 

[gmas rabbit]

I agree , just be really careful that you actual eat. Depression can cause you not to and that could account for your dizziness and feeling of being faint. Some people are eater under stress, others not. Glad that you got out. I am sorry that you had such a bad experience on another forum. Accidents happen, nothing to do with irresponsiblity. Remember to set your goals one day at a time, it is not so overwhelming that way.

 

[woahlookitsme]

I have kind of been on and off reading this thread and I can hear your stress through the posts. This thread is great for making you feel better and I'm glad you can post your feelings here when no one else will listen. The photo philes is great for finding funny and cute pictures lol. I know how it feels to loose your best friend. I am a long term girlfriend and my shortest relationship was about 4mos. Longest is current and will be 4yrs in September. I have been in your shoes and I had to focus on other things instead of dwelling. You can't think about if what you did was right or not. There are plenty of animal lovers out there that you just have to find. I'm not sure if you have a dog but dog parks are a great place to find people who love animals. I'm all about using animals to help with emotions and feelings you are going through. I am not a smoker so that I don't know about but I think exercise and attending a gym is a great thing to start! I would go during school and when I was feeling stressed about an exam coming up it would definitely help me clear my mind. Find things to do other than dwelling. Take your break it sounds like you really needed it and dont question yourself. Start doing some hobbies and find what you love doing. I enjoy art in my free time and would actually love to try those pottery classes I just have no clue where I would go to do that. Find what you love to do and do it! Nothing is the limit and don't let anyone affect you. I think it will also help you find some friends who aren't mutual friends with your ex. Look forward to hearing how you do Don't do like me and jump into the past relationship or even a new one. I have yet to have time to find myself and it really affects the person you are with. Being single to clear your head is never a bad thing.

 

[SnowyShiloh]

Jen, how are you doing tonight? I just came across this thread and there haven't been any updates. So sorry you're having a rough time, but I promise you made the right choice! This may be hard to hear, but it sounds like you love him much more than he loves you because people who love you don't try to make you feel bad. The fact that your mom sees lots of red flags is very telling, too. Be strong, don't invite him back into your life! If you want to chat on Facebook, my sleep schedule is utterly messed up and I'm up all night so you can send me a PM with your name and I'll add you to my friends list No pressure though.

 

[BunnyLove89]

SnowyShiloh wrote:

Jen, how are you doing tonight? I just came across this thread and there haven't been any updates. So sorry you're having a rough time, but I promise you made the right choice! This may be hard to hear, but it sounds like you love him much more than he loves you because people who love you don't try to make you feel bad. The fact that your mom sees lots of red flags is very telling, too. Be strong, don't invite him back into your life! If you want to chat on Facebook, my sleep schedule is utterly messed up and I'm up all night so you can send me a PM with your name and I'll add you to my friends list No pressure though.

My night was alright. I decided to go to this rape and abuse support group that I used to go to to deal with things in my past. I shared about what has been going on (but you're only allowed 3 minutes so I couldn't say everything I wanted to). In the past I've connected with some women there but last night no one said anything to me. They looked at me and walked right past me.
I don't know if it's because it's at a church and I don't look and act like everyone else. They are all overly religious and clean cut. I'm borderline religious and I have 2 tattoos and 17 piercings. I feel like I have "Loser freak" stamped on my forehead.
Then I did talk to my bf last night. He messaged me on facebook and we had a short conversation. I really miss him and I was just really desperate to have a conversation with someone. Talking to him made me feel worse tho because it made me miss him even more...

 

[gmas rabbit]

I am so sorry that your support group from the past didn't work out. Get hold of mental health or your doctor and see if there are any others especially for teenager or young adults. Quite often they have support groups in this area for young people and depression. Doesn't really matter what the topic is, it is the connection that is important. You are not a freak, even some of us older people have tatoos. As for the piercings what people need to remember is that every generation has another fad, and it is their right to choose. Take the offers about facebook, I am not on, but as soon as I get it hooked up would love to hear from you. My grandson who lives with us broke up with his long term girlfriend about 6 months ago. He was like you, questioning if he did the right thing, depressed as no one would talk to him. But he went of facebook and made a couple of connections that helped him through, got out after being literally pushed to go swimming, just walking etc. 6 months later he has found a new girlfriend and now wonders what he ever seen in the last. You might after a break decide that you want to get back together, that is up to you, recommend if you do that you get some couples councelling. You may not, but you have to take one day at a time, connect with your animals and people who care about you and give it time. Hugs for now.

 

[BunnyLove89]

I've been taking people up on their facebook offers.
My boyfriend messaged me again this morning. I'm torn because I miss him and I keep thinking of all these things I want to tell him, but I know it's only going to make me more upset in the long run because it's a tease.
He keeps telling me to talk to people and i'm getting frustrated because i've been trying, but they won't talk to me because he got to them first. God only knows what he told them. It's also messing with me in that he's still "reminding me" to do a bunch of stuff for him. So i'm still getting stressed out because as much as I try to not think about him, I keep hearing him in the back of my mind telling me what to do and what not to do. He's asked if his messaging me bothers me and I said kind of. But I don't want to tell him to stop because the other day I told him that even though we would be on a break, I still love him and i'm here for him if he needs me. But it seems like he is taking advantage of that and is just wanting to check up on me.
I'm still not sleeping. I've been having weird/bad dreams and have been waking up alot which is frustrating.
I've been thinking more about the meeting last night and I remember the last time I was there I was expressing some doubts I had about my boyfriend. The main thing then was that he is a sex addict and that takes a huge toll on me. It's like they didn't hear what I was saying because afterwards a couple people told me that from everything I had been saying the past few months said it sounds like I picked a good guy (and they weren't being sarcastic). Needless to say, it really confused me. I don't know what i'm doing wrong to make me people not want to talk to me.
The isolation is really getting to me...