Kieran and Teddy

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SnowyShiloh

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I've been wanting to make a Rainbow Bridge thread since Kieran died, but I felt somehow that I would be jinxing Teddy if I did.

For people who aren't aware of the intense sadness that's been at my house lately (I made a thread about it over in Let Your Hare Down), my cockatiels decided to have babies. 4 perfect little ones hatched and each one got a name: Kieran (whose name means "sunbeam" since he hatched on the summer solstice, also known as Mondo), Teddy (aka Teddy Bird and Mr T), Neeja (named by my fiance after a Star Wars character) and Phoenix (aka Mr Tiny). I carefully checked on them two or three times a day to make sure everyone was okay. And everything was pretty good for about a week! I had some small worries, but overall everything was good and I was so happy about our little baby birds and so proud of Arthur and Poppet.

A week ago the oldest chick, Kieran, started showing signs of sour crop. The crop is where baby birds store food until it empties into the stomach and is digested. Food that stays too long in the crop or gets infected with bacteria or yeast or any number of other things ferments and then either doesn't empty properly or carries the bacteria through the rest of the body, or both. I took the chicks to the vet on Thursday and spent the rest of that day and the next caring for him and Teddy around the clock at home. Then Teddy, the second oldest chick, started showing signs of sour crop too. The next day Neeja, the 3rd chick, did too.

Sweet Kieran died Saturday morning after a very long night while I was on the phone with a veterinarian. His death was very upsetting because he suffered terribly. I had thought that out of the 4 chicks, he was most likely to survive to adulthood because he was the oldest and would get the most food. I thought Kieran and I would have many, many years together. I was over the moon when he hatched from his little egg and cried happy tears.

Teddy and Neeja were brought to the vet again that day and we got medication. I've spent the days since then taking care of Teddy and Neeja in a brooder around the clock, giving them medicine, feeding them by hand, emptying their crops, giving Teddy subcutaneous fluids, and the many other things that one must do for young baby birds as well as trying everything I've heard that may possibly help. Teddy actually improved for a little while, then stayed the same, then got worse today.

Over the past several days, Neeja and Teddy became my babies instead of Arthur's and Poppet's babies. They learned to eat from a syringe and cried for food when they saw me instead of hissing at me. Teddy would nibble my fingers because he wanted food. I tried very hard not to get attached to the chicks because I knew there was a good chance they'd die in spite of everything I've been doing for them, but of course it's impossible not to get attached to little baby birdies.

Sweet little Teddy Bird died this evening at 14 days old. I'm so upset over it, even though I knew it was very likely he wouldn't make it and maybe he would have just had a lifetime of pain if he'd lived. His little life was so full of suffering. On the one hand, I feel guilty for forcing him to live for so long when he was ill. On the other hand, I feel guilty for letting him down and him dying. If they had hatched to someone who had experience with baby cockatiels and the necessary equipment, their illnesses would have been detected much sooner and they probably would have lived. Teddy was I think the sweetest baby of the 4 chicks and I felt a special connection with him. He was so trusting of me.

The only good thing I can say is that I finally got to give Teddy a kiss as he was dying in my hands. I've wanted to give him a kiss for days but always resisted because I didn't want his delicate immune system to have to deal with my germs. When I knew he was dying and my germs couldn't hurt him anymore, I finally got to kiss the top of his tiny noggin. Thinking of it makes me cry again.

Before the eggs hatched, I told myself that I would be happy if just 1 chick survived to adulthood. I can't believe how naive I was. Of course I got attached to the chicks and they're all important to me. Thinking that any of their deaths wouldn't affect me too much is obviously ridiculous now.

I am even more doubtful now that Neeja will survive, but I will try my best. Little Phoenix, who I was actually thought wouldn't make it the first few days of his life, is doing okay. I worry every day that he's coming down with sour crop too and keep noticing things that may or may not be indicative of it beginning. His nickname of Mr Tiny is now rather ironic since he weighs over twice as much as Kieran and Teddy did when they died, and twice as much as Neeja even though he's the youngest by several days.

Here are the obligatory photos:

Kieran soon after he hatched. This photo was practically my first glimpse of Kieran. I thought he hadn't hatched yet and went to the nest box, camera in hand, to get a picture of his egg. I couldn't actually see this picture when I took it because my eyes were blinded by tears of happiness.
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Arthur and Poppet were both there when Teddy hatched:
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right after Teddy hatched:
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later that same day (this is a video):


fuzzy little siblings with the not yet hatched Phoenix:
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Kieran
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Teddy:
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brotherly love:
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Teddy:
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super cute 7 day old Kieran just opening his eyes:
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Kieran's crop problems had already begun by now but I didn't realize it yet:
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Teddy 8 days:
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Teddy after he started getting sick:
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Tall Teddy begging for food while wearing his crop bra:
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Sweet Teddy's face:
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Teddy with Neeja (Teddy on the left):
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Teddy nuzzling my hand, hoping for food:
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Fly free on your little baby wings, my dears, and watch over Neeja and Phoenix.



 
There are just no words... :sad:RIP sweet babies. Shiloh, we send you all our love. I cannot imagine how you must be feeling.
 
we are so sorry for your losses. We have Zebra Finches that nested and started hatching on Easter Sunday--3 of the 5 survived. It's never easy, but it just happens. Rest in peace Kiernan and Teddy
 
Kieran and Teddy have touched so many of us in their all too short lives.

I am so sorry they didn't make it. You tried so hard, Shiloh. No one could have done more.

:pray: for Neeja and Phoenix

Jan
 
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