I wish that I was single again!

[Runestonez]

Angieluv does your vet already give you a discount? I'm in Ontario, but our vet gives us a multi-pet discount(more than 5 pets)...it's not much...about 5% off services and things like that. But it helps take a bit of the pinch out of med bills! We have 4 bunns and 5 cats right now( I have been warned I will be sleeping outside if anymore show up!! ) and after spending about $100 dollars a month just on hay, I tracked down a farm just outside of town that trains/boards horses. The woman gave us a great deal on baled hay...she picks out the nice grassy ones for us...it is around a 50lb bale I think...I have to get hubby to lift it...for $3!!! Much nicer than driving 45 minutes to the closest store that carried good quality hay! It is super fresh and smells much nicer than the stuff we were buying! The bunns love it too! Our one cat has a problem with protien build up in her bladder and was really prone to bladder stones(she had 2 seperate surgeries for them!) The prescription food from the vet was killing us so we started looking around for brand name catfood with lower protien...which we eventually found for about $10 less a bag. So far 5 years later no more surgeries and she is fit and healthy! Our dog was taking thyroid meds (Hypothyroidism) and then vet told us if we brought back the bottle instead of them having to give us a new one each time, that that would help cut a bit of the cost as well. Do they have generic meds for pets?? We also stash $10 dollars a paycheck away in a seperate account for emergencies(it is sorely depleted now!) but even that little helps offset vet bills!

Sorry I can't suggest more! Hope some of this helps! He might want to keep in mind you are helping to pay for his cat and dogs care as well as the care for the kids you brought in! He knew you were an animal lover when he married you, I hope it is just the stress of finances that has made him a grouch! Once an animal lover always an animal lover...some things never change! Hugs!

 

[Maureen Las]

Lissa..I Only go to Farm and Fleet and use that bedding. i love that bedding.I also discovered that Woodmans sells Kaytee hay and rabbit pellets forabout 1/2 the price of Petsmart and.Petco.(same brands). I also can get some of my dog food at Woodmans. Petco is the most expensive. I could bring down the costs if I fed everyone cheaper food but I know that it's not good for them. The cats food is expensive but I can't do much about it unless maybe do the raw diet. I am starting to try not to eat meat, myself, and also to buy cruelty free products. but that puts me in a bind too because a lot of those products cost more. Do you eat boca burgers and that soy "meat". I like it better than regular meat because it doesn't make me feel stuffed. What else do you eat?

 

[Maureen Las]

Runestonz..you sound like me. I get Oxbow hay and i know I could get good hay somewhere here because we are surrounded by country.Maybe I could put an ad in the paper saying that I wanted quality timothy hay? Great idea! No, the vets here do not give any discounts(they do rotate free care to the shelter). The vets in this town( inaddition to Physicians,dentists, lawyers) are probably the only people that have money. I came from Chicago where people got paid high salaries and here people barely make anything. The vets herecould be a lot more generous than they are and I don't understand why they are not. Anyway I appreciate your suggestions.

 

[Runestonez]

We had an awful time trying to find plain Timothy hay here...the best I could find was 40% alfalfa blend. Finally I broke down and called a couple of stables to find out where they were getting their hay from. The lady I talked to at the one place grows her own. It isn't timothy it is a blend of 3-4 types of hay and the bunns go wild for it! They actually eat a lot more and I can change their litter more often because I don't have to worry about paying thru the roof for hay anymore! It is too bad your vet won't give you a discount...it's not like you have 1 pet and go to the vet every 2 years or something. I know with our kids we end up at the vet every 3 months at least for something small! Baled hay is a life saver though if you can find any!!! I love it!!

 

[Jenni]

Runestonez offered some great suggestions! Try to find a small feed store and buy hay by the pallette. It is much cheaper that way. Also you can usually find better deals on food at these places, because they sell to ranchers and farmers who buy their feed in bulk.

When I say a feed store, I don't mean Tractor Supply or some chain like that. Find a small, local feed store that sells to ranchersor farmers in your area. Even if you live in a big city, there are still feed stores around, escpecially on the outskirts. It may be cheaper to drivea little more.

Also, I am not sure why your hubbie is so worried about the water from washing your bunny's towels. It seems that the dryer would burn more cash? If you dry them in the dryer you could start using a clothesline, maybe.

My hubby is a penny pincher and he nags me about money some. We have a budget that we spend on certain things ($100 for clothes or something like that). Could ya'll set a monthy budget for your animals that both of you agree on? If so, save all the receipts from your animal purchases or write them down in a little book. When your hubbie complains, you will be able to show him that you have not gone over budget. He may be worried about money and may just figure you are spending it all, without really knowing if it is really the fact or not. It could be going to other things and just assumes it's the animals.

 

[TinysMom]

First of all - I'm an animal lover too and while I don't have as large a variety of animals as you do - I have enough rabbits that their food bill is almost half as much as the food bill for the two of us (although I am conservative grocery shopper and folks say I don't spend too much). Still yet...it is expensive.

I don't know how long you've been married - it will be 27 years for us in August....and we've been through some financial situations so I sort of feel a bit "qualified" to speak about this stuff...

One thing I've noticed about my husband and some other men...is that they are more "practical" than we are. If they deal with the issues of marriage like money, etc. ~ then they may notice before us if there are problems and show their concern. This can cause a man (or woman) to worry.

I don't know who does the finances in your family - but let's say (since it is summertime - although you may not have the high electric bills like we do here in Texas right now) - that your husband knew that maybe your electric was in danger of being turned off due to high bills and no money for them. Wouldn't that make him or you anxious?

Or lets say there were things going on at his job and he was worried about either getting a pay cut or maybe losing his job in the future? Do you have a financial cushion you could live off of?

My point is this - finances are often the cause of fights in a marriage (and statistically often a cause for divorce). I really think it is important for both people to work together to set goals and then work towards those goals.

With all that said - is there something you can do to help with the finances so that maybe your husband can start enjoying your animals with you without being so stressed? Can you....

babysit out of your home one or two days per week?

pet sit for others and get paid?

walk dogs and get some extra money?

type up papers for local college students?

edit papers (if you're good at English)?

merchandise in stores (go to www.narms.com to register - PM me and I can talk you through things which you could probably do easily - and sometimes you can pick up jobs that take you just a few minutes but pay $10 - $15 each).

have a yard sale and sell some unnecessary things to help you set aside money for the pets?



These are just a few ideas - perhaps folks can add a few more.

My point in this post isn't to take sides or to say that your husband is right. But I happen to think that while marriages can have rocky times - if we will take the time to listen to the other person's real concerns behind the words they're saying....that it can make a marriage better as then both partners can come together and work towards the same goal.

I don't think the issue is so much that your husband doesn't enjoy the pets or dislikes them as much as it is that there is something going on that has him concerned. I don't know his age - but I know that when we hit 40 and realized we hadn't even started saving for retirement - it hit us hard and we had a few rocky times as we tried to sort out our priorities. Right now our money is VERY tight as our electric bill last month was almost as much as our mortgage bill (gee - I love Texas summers)...and Art had made a couple of foolish purchases and I was really upset.

But then I remembered - this is the man I love - and he's forgiven me so many times when I've bought extra rabbits or spent money and put us in a tough spot. So I forgave him and then we sat down and came up with a game plan for making it through this month.

I'm sorry for the very rambly and wordy post. I'm not trying to say that you're wrong for caring for your animals - you give them excellent care. But perhaps if you can try to listen to your husband's concern and see things for a few moments from his side....you can work together to come up with ways to work through this.

BTW - I have a woman coming tomorrow to get some pet quality rabbits from me. What she's paying will ALMOST pay the rabbit's food bill for the whole month of July....so I'm so psyched. (To give you an idea - we go through a 50 pound bag every two days lately).

You'll be in my thoughts and prayers - feel free to pm me if you'd like help in coming up with ideas of jobs you might be able to do - even short term! One year our family worked together to deliver phone books (1997 - in Anchorage, Alaska) - I think we made something like $1000 in 2 1/2 weeks. We were paid per phone book and we had three runners and one driver (me).... It made for long days as we worked when Art would get off work - so basically he was working about 14 hour days those two weeks.....but boy was it worth it!

Peg

 

[Lissa]

angieluv wrote:

Lissa..I Only go to Farm and Fleet and use that bedding. i love that bedding.I also discovered that Woodmans sells Kaytee hay and rabbit pellets forabout 1/2 the price of Petsmart and.Petco. (same brands). I also can get some of my dog food at Woodmans. Petco is the most expensive. I could bring down the costs if I fed everyone cheaper food but I know that it's not good for them. The cats food is expensive but I can't do much about it unless maybe do the raw diet. I am starting to try not to eat meat, myself, and also to buy cruelty free products. but that puts me in a bind too because a lot of those products cost more. Do you eat boca burgers and that soy "meat". I like it better than regular meat because it doesn't make me feel stuffed. What else do you eat?

Farm and Fleet has the best prices for pet supplies. In fact, I don't even go to Petco or Petsmart anymore. Both places are way over priced.

When I gave up meat a year ago, I had already been semi-veg for about 7 years. I had not eaten red meat in 7 years. It was very difficult to finally give up chicken and fish because almost everything you eat it seems like has some sort of animal base (even "vegetarian" soup broths have chicken fat base). I eat a lot of Morningstar Farms because I don't really care for the Boca brand even though they are cheaper. Woodmans has a really good selection. I get the mock chicken burgers. Those are the best.

I also found a very good recipe for walnut burgers. You can buy walnut burgers at the Peoples Food Coop but they are very pricey. I made homemade ones and they were pretty good too. Let me know if you want the recipe. I can try and find it. I hope I kept it!!

I eat a lot of dark leafy vegetables, fruitsand peanut butter too.

 

[Maureen Las]

The problem here is that I am spending it all for the animals..and he would freak out if i showed him the receipts. I buy my jeans from the salvation army for $5.00, never entertain, never take vacations ...and yes my husband is angry about the dryer but all the rabbit towels broke the washer. and I can't have dirty rabbit towels just building up. The problem is that I really have too many pets but I really believe that once i have them they are my responsibility for life. The grey hound is 15yrs old and one cat is 16 yrs. old and recently they have been peeing in the house (old age stuff) and driving me crazy too...but they are not sick enough to be put down as they still have quality of life and I can't put down a pet that has quality of life even it is making more work for me (which it is) When the older animals are gone it will reduce a lot of the spending as they have meds and special food but I am not going to speed up the process. I am not going to replace the older dog and cat....but I always have room and desire for one more bunny:inlove:

 

[maherwoman]

angieluv, I found a site that might be of help to ya! (hopefully) It's a hay exchange site, that has some Canadian places as well (I can never remember where members are located...lol)...

http://www.hayexchange.com/

Let me know if this helps any. It's a site that finds hay near you that's for sale, as well as allows you to post that you need hay. I found it by accident while searching around one time.

 

[maherwoman]

I agree completely. That's always been my view, too. I don't see how they're different, really, except that they don't have the voice that we do...thus, I see that we have the responsibility to protect them and give them that voice.

I hope someday soon you will be able to communicate to your husband your love for animals in such a way that he fully understands and just lets his issue about finances with animal costs go (while realizing that you do everything you can to cut costs, while still giving them the quality of life they need). Not to mention just understands and stops having an issue with your love for animals. My husband wasn't much of an animal person when I met him, and over time I've gotten him to understand my love for them a bit more. There are times that I have to remind him that he's not being quite nice enough about it, but otherwise, he's pretty good about it. I hope you and your husband reach that place soon, too.

I think one of the key things is him accepting you for who you are, and realizing that this part of you isn't going to change. He doesn't have to have the same love for animals, just needs to be sensitive to yours.

angieluv wrote:

I don't believe that humans are superior to animals.....only different.

 

[Maureen Las]

Thanks maherwoman....I will check that out ..I should be able to find hay around here as we are surrounded by country. JenniThere is a feed store not far from here (I have never been there) but I know that they onlyhave alfalfa pellets. but I should check it out anyway. Thanks

 

[maherwoman]

YAY...I may have finally found something that helped! Let me know if it finds something near ya!

Until then, try to relax and be calm about things. I'm sure your husband will come around. He loves you and you love him, and anything can be communicated out. There might just be some basic lack of understanding in this that needs to be communicated, and would resolve things. The key is to communicate without allowing emotions to get the better of the two of you...to communicate about it in a new unit of time, and not allow emotions that past arguments contained to overcome your communication. Does that make sense?

Just thought I would lend a little idea there, and send my love to you both (as well as your animals)! We love you and are here for you!

 

[Jenni]

See if you can buy hay at the feed store too.

 

[Maureen Las]

Tinysmom you really hit the nail on the head. When I was single I had fewer pets and worried about my own finances. Now that I am married Jim worries about the money, pays the bills, takes care of the cars, etc. and I sort of mentally float into my world of animals. We lost a lot of money here when we hired a man to restore this old house. He did a small amount of work, took most of the money and took off. Jim has been a wreck since then because we lost thousands of dollars and will never see it again. The state tookthis crookto court for this but after some jail time he was released on huber and took off. We had to hire AND PAY a new person to do the work. I am really not a practical person and if someone else is I am happy to let them take care of business matters. I think that I have lacked understanding of Jim's worry and it shows. Maybe if I talked to him more about that it would help. I can't work full time because of a medical condition that occurred while I was a registered nurse. Nursing is too hard for me now. I started pet sitting part time because I was my own boss and could refuse work that I couldn't handle. I am starting some pet-sitting this summer but still have some concerns about driving on country road at night. Thanks Tinys Mom I think that I have been sort of selfish and not realized it :hug:

 

[hummer]

This may be a little late in the discussion and I am not sure if this was mentioned before but I did see that drying the rabbits towels adds up on your bills. This would take a little time but what about line drying the towels? Not sure about where you are on the map but I am sure that it would help some right? If the weather is not cooporative, is there room in the house, like on the rabbit cages, in the bathroom or the garage? You would just need to make sure you have enough towels to where when some are drying you have others for them to use.

Unfortunatly that is the only suggestion I can think of, I hope it might help you some. I hope it gets better for you soon!

 

[TinysMom]

First of all, I hope you don't think I was trying to criticize you - as I think your animals are getting great care and I'm happy for you and them. I honestly suspect your husband loves your animals and is just worried about bills.

But there are two ways to make finances better - cut back on spending - and bring in more money.

So here are a couple of ideas that might or might not work for you...

I've always enjoyed your posts - so could you consider writing for some RN magazinse (are there such things)? Maybe even just pieces like "Top 10 Mistakes New RNs should avoid" and "5 Ways to Balance Working and Family Life".

Or maybe you don't want to write about things to do w/ being an RN....can you take photos of your animals and submit them to a magazine? Perhaps write a short article on them or caring for older animals?

I am about to get back into freelance writing and I am waiting to receive my Writer's Market guide. I will be glad to look up information for you once I get it and PM you with editor's names for RN magazines or pet magazines or something. Or maybe you can do a search on the web.

You mention the fact that you and your husband lost thousands of dollars from this person who took the money and left. Have you heard suggestions from folks on how you could've avoided it? Well - take those suggestions and write about it - maybe "Three Things You Need to Know Before Hiring a Contractor".

There is always your local newspaper - could they use an article on something?

I know - I'm stressing writing here - but writing is something you can do from home.

Also, I know that you say you can't work (sorry about that) - does that mean you couldn't work as one of those nurses who goes to patient's homes and takes their blood pressure and stuff and charts it once a week? I forget what that is called.

Anyway - those are some ideas. Maybe if you can bring in a bit of extra money - it will show your honey that you're listening and do care about his concerns..

Peg

 

[Lissa]

As far as vet bills, maybe it's time to look into pet insurance?

 

[Jenni]

You could also try making a little money selling things on Ebay.

 

[Spring]

I'm sorry that you're having problems. I have a few things that I do that cut the cost for the rabbits for me (It's not much, but every penny saved helps!)

For the hay, I would really try looking around to buy in bales. This is a life saver if you have ltos of rabbits. It is very cheap and will last you awhile (You can also maybe but a bale for the shelter as well?). There has to be some good quality timothy somewhere!

For the towels, I know you've mentioned about washing them ect. For me, If my girls mess up the towels, I just clip the dirty part out with scissors and give them it. Once the towel is all cut up and I can't use it anymore, I buy some new ones. You could also maybe try buying some from value village and just washing them to save the cost on towels? I've started using some of the old clothes I've grown out of for blankies for my girls.

You could also try growing your vegetables in pots or if you have a garden? I've started growing my own greens, and my girls LOVE the freshness of them. Even if I don't have enough growing, the vegetables I get from a farm market are fairly cheap.

I hope you can work things out!

 

[Maureen Las]

I used to be really interested in writing but at this point I think that I will concentrate on pet-sitting as it really agrees with me.