Dearest Cloud,
Well, what can I say. There is both so much to say, and so little. In your life there were 9 days when I didn't see you, and now I haven't seen you for 8 days and it feels like a lifetime.
Let me look over your life.
You were probably the outcome of the single most desperate and probably irresponsible thing I did with my bunnies. But what an outcome! You were both amazing, and such a turd! As you know! I do regret the action, but I donât regret the outcome; how could I regret you!
You were born 10 days shy of 7 months after losing Flash, and you were his first grandchild. You were the product of the most lacklustre breeding I've ever done!
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I remember the morning you were born. I came downstairs, went outside to check Boof and she was sitting and munching, so I changed her water and such, and then got an almighty shock, because I had somehow failed to see the foetal giant in the middle of the day area. It was MASSIVE! And it was a spotty, just like your dad and granddad, but the gross thing was that it was covered in ants. URGH! Given that I realised that she had kindled I went to the nest. I could see two partially formed baby blobs, but no babies and so reached in, with a plastic bag, crying my eyes out, to clear the unformed babies. The second my hand touched the nest you leapt out and screamed at me. I swear Cloud, I had a heart attack at that moment because you scared me sooooooooo much. Then I started to laugh and cry like a madwoman (God knows what anyone who was listening thought).
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Boof was an awesome mum. She was truly brilliant (thankfully, because I was still stupidly ignorant). When you got to two weeks old you did away with your nest and became a little bunny running around.
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You were hilarious! Soon I would take you out and spend most of the day with you. Youâd run all round the living room with no sign of any fear about anything.
By about 18 days you were sleeping as a âpowder puffâ (or duck pose or loaf) position in the day area.
I remember when you were about 24 days old and it was one of the funniest things Iâve seen a rabbit do. You had no fear, none at all, and you believed the world was yours for the taking. You were looking around the living room, and you were eyeing the settee. You stood, and you faced it. You took a few shuffley steps backwards, still facing the settee, and you ran. You ran as fast as your legs would carry you, and you jumped. You had the complete belief that you would get up there. What actually happened was that you jumped about 3 inches off the floor, then landed, legs splayed out all around you, having done a belly flop on the floor. Even writing this now I can picture it and it still makes me laugh. Such a small bunny which such big hopes and dreams. You didnât try again until many months later.
As you got older you would spend all day with me, either running around, or snuggling and sleeping in my elbow. By 6 weeks, if you heard the hoover, you would fall asleep, instantly; it was weird. You kept that need to snuggle in my elbow until the day you died. If I picked you up and held you, you would sleep there, you were comfortable there and felt safe. My elbow was your haven (what a strange sentence).
Around this time you and dad became real friends too. Dad has always liked any bunny that responded to him, and you did. You and he were firm friends, again, until the day you died.
You never ever had anything bad happen in your life yet when your hormones arrived they changed my cuddly little buddy into a vicious little turd. I couldnât do anything with you unless you attacked me. I couldnât feed you or anything without feeling your wrath, but because I loved you deeply, I still did it all, and still kept you. I will also always keep the scars you gave me!
I started to really learn then, by joining forums, and found out more about neutering, and we knew that was the way to go, so we got you done. My GOD! You were so angry! I mean, so angry for the first three days, Mind you, if someone removed part of me like that, I would probably be angry too.
It did help though! You were more manageable, but still not a bunny to put my hands in and stroke. Given that you were more manageable we decided to bond you with the Dopeys, and they changed you. It was an easy bond and you were such a good group. It took you months until you groomed them back though, but you did, eventually.
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You had a mild interlude where you all lived as a quad with Candyfloss, and then ended up divorcing into two pairs. When Floss divorced you too you went back with the Dopeys soooooooooooooo easily. It was so right that you were a trio again.
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You were a funny guy, with many funny quirks. My favourite was the way you had dad wrapped around your paw. He would stroke you and give you all sorts of love and you loved it, and when he stopped you would look around, then scrabble him, and he would carry on stroking you. Talk about reinforcing the bad behaviour! I think dad liked being the one you chose to stroke him though, and he liked that quirk, so he kept it. The funniest time was when you stamped your annoyance and crippled him. You came back to me super fast that day. You blew it! But it was funny!
You had many happy months back with the Dopeys before I realised something was wrong. Your breathing was not right, so off to the vets we went. You had a sub-clinical infection, and so we didnât treat. We then had another wobble where you got very vicious and were drinking for England, and also had a wet tail. The vet found your liver was hugely distended.
From here on in life just went downhill for you. Within a couple of months it became clear that you wouldnât be with us for the length of time you should have. We struggled to medicate you because of your stress, and we couldnât take you to the vets easily because of your stress either. With the vets, we agreed to do what we could to make you comfortable, but that we couldnât intervene because me holding you induced mouth breathing, and we couldnât risk respiratory failure. I wish I could have done something for you though Cloud. I am fighting alongside Badger to get his issues sorted but I couldnât fight alongside you because you felt I was fighting against you. I tried to do what I felt was best for you my chap.
I tried to make your life as good as possible, but thatâs a bit hard when you had to be kept calm. You did get your last time out in the sunshine, you did get yummy foods to the end, have different places to run, have strokes and love.
We maintained you successfully for a couple of months. We had one more blast of oral antibiotics with the idea that I could get you stable enough to get you to the vets for antibiotic injections. That was not to be. I made the appointment for you, at the vets, but that day it was like you knew, and you were letting me know you had had enough. You went a funny blue anytime you moved but mainly you stayed still. Everything on you headed south, and you were boney, boney on your back, but had a large belly and you were in a grump. I knew that that was the day. I spent time with you and the Dopeys, and tried to make it as nice as possible.
They came to the vets with you, but I carried you in and left them in the car. The vet was really good, and just accepted I knew best and didnât fuss you. I held you as I had held you as a baby, with you snuggled in my elbow. You felt the needle and you rested your chin on my arm and you waited to go. You did then. You slipped quietly away, surrounded by complete love.
I felt a bad owner that day because right up to the appointment I debated if it was the right thing to do. I also felt bad because I was unable to give you all the treatments I would normally give to a bunny who was struggling. I wish I could have taken you to the vets.
When it came though, I knew I had done the right thing. I may have felt an inferior owner, but I had done what was best for you. I had spent many nights crying over you and grieving for you before you died and when you did die, I just felt relief for you because I knew I had gotten it right. Then I felt inferior because I wasnât grieving, but if I step back I know that everything I did for you was what was best for you.
You were a hugely important part of my life and came into it when I needed some hope. You gave me that hope. I have written this tribute because I want you to be remembered now, but I am also making the video too, and that will go up for people to see in due course. Youâre not forgotten Cloud, donât ever, EVER think that.
Youâre buried in the garden now, next to Boof. You have a rose on your grave which will be planted this weekend. Sorry Cloudy Boy, but its pink, although it is called âSpecial Friendâ which is completely appropriate.
The Dopeys spent a couple of days looking quite lost, but they have bounced back quickly and well. Iâm hoping to bond them with either Angel or Autumn, and the other respective bunny will move into my room when Sandy moves out to live with Roger.
I, on the other hand, miss you deeply, but donât allow myself to because I know you are free. You had it hard those last months, and now you are free from that.
In the words of my dad âI wonât be saying good bye, because I know that I will see him againâ. So Cloud, Iâm not going to say Goodbye, Iâm going to say Au revoir.
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[align=center] Cloud
17[sup]th[/sup] July 2006- 8[sup]th[/sup] April 2010
âUntil we meet againâ
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Well, what can I say. There is both so much to say, and so little. In your life there were 9 days when I didn't see you, and now I haven't seen you for 8 days and it feels like a lifetime.
Let me look over your life.
You were probably the outcome of the single most desperate and probably irresponsible thing I did with my bunnies. But what an outcome! You were both amazing, and such a turd! As you know! I do regret the action, but I donât regret the outcome; how could I regret you!
You were born 10 days shy of 7 months after losing Flash, and you were his first grandchild. You were the product of the most lacklustre breeding I've ever done!
[align=center]
[/align]
[align=center]
[/align]
I remember the morning you were born. I came downstairs, went outside to check Boof and she was sitting and munching, so I changed her water and such, and then got an almighty shock, because I had somehow failed to see the foetal giant in the middle of the day area. It was MASSIVE! And it was a spotty, just like your dad and granddad, but the gross thing was that it was covered in ants. URGH! Given that I realised that she had kindled I went to the nest. I could see two partially formed baby blobs, but no babies and so reached in, with a plastic bag, crying my eyes out, to clear the unformed babies. The second my hand touched the nest you leapt out and screamed at me. I swear Cloud, I had a heart attack at that moment because you scared me sooooooooo much. Then I started to laugh and cry like a madwoman (God knows what anyone who was listening thought).
[align=center]
[/align]
Boof was an awesome mum. She was truly brilliant (thankfully, because I was still stupidly ignorant). When you got to two weeks old you did away with your nest and became a little bunny running around.
[align=center]
[/align]
[align=center]
[/align]
You were hilarious! Soon I would take you out and spend most of the day with you. Youâd run all round the living room with no sign of any fear about anything.
By about 18 days you were sleeping as a âpowder puffâ (or duck pose or loaf) position in the day area.
I remember when you were about 24 days old and it was one of the funniest things Iâve seen a rabbit do. You had no fear, none at all, and you believed the world was yours for the taking. You were looking around the living room, and you were eyeing the settee. You stood, and you faced it. You took a few shuffley steps backwards, still facing the settee, and you ran. You ran as fast as your legs would carry you, and you jumped. You had the complete belief that you would get up there. What actually happened was that you jumped about 3 inches off the floor, then landed, legs splayed out all around you, having done a belly flop on the floor. Even writing this now I can picture it and it still makes me laugh. Such a small bunny which such big hopes and dreams. You didnât try again until many months later.
As you got older you would spend all day with me, either running around, or snuggling and sleeping in my elbow. By 6 weeks, if you heard the hoover, you would fall asleep, instantly; it was weird. You kept that need to snuggle in my elbow until the day you died. If I picked you up and held you, you would sleep there, you were comfortable there and felt safe. My elbow was your haven (what a strange sentence).
Around this time you and dad became real friends too. Dad has always liked any bunny that responded to him, and you did. You and he were firm friends, again, until the day you died.
You never ever had anything bad happen in your life yet when your hormones arrived they changed my cuddly little buddy into a vicious little turd. I couldnât do anything with you unless you attacked me. I couldnât feed you or anything without feeling your wrath, but because I loved you deeply, I still did it all, and still kept you. I will also always keep the scars you gave me!
I started to really learn then, by joining forums, and found out more about neutering, and we knew that was the way to go, so we got you done. My GOD! You were so angry! I mean, so angry for the first three days, Mind you, if someone removed part of me like that, I would probably be angry too.
It did help though! You were more manageable, but still not a bunny to put my hands in and stroke. Given that you were more manageable we decided to bond you with the Dopeys, and they changed you. It was an easy bond and you were such a good group. It took you months until you groomed them back though, but you did, eventually.
[align=center]
[/align]
You had a mild interlude where you all lived as a quad with Candyfloss, and then ended up divorcing into two pairs. When Floss divorced you too you went back with the Dopeys soooooooooooooo easily. It was so right that you were a trio again.
[align=center]
[/align]
You were a funny guy, with many funny quirks. My favourite was the way you had dad wrapped around your paw. He would stroke you and give you all sorts of love and you loved it, and when he stopped you would look around, then scrabble him, and he would carry on stroking you. Talk about reinforcing the bad behaviour! I think dad liked being the one you chose to stroke him though, and he liked that quirk, so he kept it. The funniest time was when you stamped your annoyance and crippled him. You came back to me super fast that day. You blew it! But it was funny!
You had many happy months back with the Dopeys before I realised something was wrong. Your breathing was not right, so off to the vets we went. You had a sub-clinical infection, and so we didnât treat. We then had another wobble where you got very vicious and were drinking for England, and also had a wet tail. The vet found your liver was hugely distended.
From here on in life just went downhill for you. Within a couple of months it became clear that you wouldnât be with us for the length of time you should have. We struggled to medicate you because of your stress, and we couldnât take you to the vets easily because of your stress either. With the vets, we agreed to do what we could to make you comfortable, but that we couldnât intervene because me holding you induced mouth breathing, and we couldnât risk respiratory failure. I wish I could have done something for you though Cloud. I am fighting alongside Badger to get his issues sorted but I couldnât fight alongside you because you felt I was fighting against you. I tried to do what I felt was best for you my chap.
I tried to make your life as good as possible, but thatâs a bit hard when you had to be kept calm. You did get your last time out in the sunshine, you did get yummy foods to the end, have different places to run, have strokes and love.
We maintained you successfully for a couple of months. We had one more blast of oral antibiotics with the idea that I could get you stable enough to get you to the vets for antibiotic injections. That was not to be. I made the appointment for you, at the vets, but that day it was like you knew, and you were letting me know you had had enough. You went a funny blue anytime you moved but mainly you stayed still. Everything on you headed south, and you were boney, boney on your back, but had a large belly and you were in a grump. I knew that that was the day. I spent time with you and the Dopeys, and tried to make it as nice as possible.
They came to the vets with you, but I carried you in and left them in the car. The vet was really good, and just accepted I knew best and didnât fuss you. I held you as I had held you as a baby, with you snuggled in my elbow. You felt the needle and you rested your chin on my arm and you waited to go. You did then. You slipped quietly away, surrounded by complete love.
I felt a bad owner that day because right up to the appointment I debated if it was the right thing to do. I also felt bad because I was unable to give you all the treatments I would normally give to a bunny who was struggling. I wish I could have taken you to the vets.
When it came though, I knew I had done the right thing. I may have felt an inferior owner, but I had done what was best for you. I had spent many nights crying over you and grieving for you before you died and when you did die, I just felt relief for you because I knew I had gotten it right. Then I felt inferior because I wasnât grieving, but if I step back I know that everything I did for you was what was best for you.
You were a hugely important part of my life and came into it when I needed some hope. You gave me that hope. I have written this tribute because I want you to be remembered now, but I am also making the video too, and that will go up for people to see in due course. Youâre not forgotten Cloud, donât ever, EVER think that.
Youâre buried in the garden now, next to Boof. You have a rose on your grave which will be planted this weekend. Sorry Cloudy Boy, but its pink, although it is called âSpecial Friendâ which is completely appropriate.
The Dopeys spent a couple of days looking quite lost, but they have bounced back quickly and well. Iâm hoping to bond them with either Angel or Autumn, and the other respective bunny will move into my room when Sandy moves out to live with Roger.
I, on the other hand, miss you deeply, but donât allow myself to because I know you are free. You had it hard those last months, and now you are free from that.
In the words of my dad âI wonât be saying good bye, because I know that I will see him againâ. So Cloud, Iâm not going to say Goodbye, Iâm going to say Au revoir.
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[/align]
[align=center] Cloud
17[sup]th[/sup] July 2006- 8[sup]th[/sup] April 2010
âUntil we meet againâ
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