Bunny passed away, can’t seem to overcome grief and guilt..

[Toffeeandgingerx]

I’m so sorry to hear that. How did ginger react to it? My buns spent 6 years with his bun-mate, but now he’s acting normal/ non-Chalant, and I can’t tell if he’s okay or if he still doesn’t get it. Hurts me still. How are both your bunnies now? I’m feeling the same guilt as you had, if only I brought her to the vet sooner, if only I fed her more hay, if only I brought her for more checkups. Still beating myself up, although I’m still trying to rationalise with myself. It sucks, and I hope it gets better in time.

Ginger too was acting normal, it wasn’t until misty I realised he was missing toffee because of how normal he was acting. It does get better with time, it’s just different for every person, it took me time to realise I was doing what was best for toffee and that’s exactly what you did for your girl! You’ll never replace her and she’ll always be in your heart, I find myself talking about toffee alll the time. Gingers now happier than ever that he’s got a little mate again. But remember it’s your decision and what’s best for you and your bun. Plz keep us updated on everything and know you’re not alone if you need to talk

 

[Allie_Bear]

We had a similar situation with our last one. We had just gotten here GI back in shape after she was locked up. We had to stick syringes into her skin to feed water into her as the vet instructed. She was finally back to normal, but my wife had just left to go see her mother and I noticed our Allie-Bear "baby picture attached" lying on her side on the porch. That was not normal for her and I had just petted her while she was up in one of the spongy lounge chairs that she liked about ten minutes ago. Anyway, she was just about gone by the time I got to her. I hope that she was aware enough to feel comforted as I touched her before she passed.
That was very unexpected though. The vet did a minimal autopsy and said she died of a brain tumor or growth in her skull. Personally, I think it's probable that she jumped off the chair and smacked her head on the metal table or chair cross-leg. She was getting older but insisted on still jumping up and off of high furniture despite that she was getting rather uncoordinated in her old age. She loved heights and used to scare us half to death climbing up high things. We had just moved into a new place one time and had a queen mattress and boxspring leaning against the wall with boxes next to them. She got on the boxes then all the way up on top of the mattress, then started hunching down and staring at the floor getting ready to jump down. I had visions of broken bunny leg before I snatched her up.
Anyway, we felt some guilt too, but it was her time. And we spoiled her and loved her every day. She had a pretty good life, like your bun's I'm sure. I miss our little monster. I love the harlequin breed as much for their playfulness as their mischief. Our first one "****oo" had the strangest temper...very vindictive and stayed mad sometimes for days. I just have to share this ... I was remodeling virtually every room in the house, so I kept moving her cage and living area so I could work on the room she was in. She complained some depending on where I moved her, but once I chose the foyer at the front door. She hated that spot. She wouldn't eat, slammed her feet down, chewed on the cage bars and even after moving her from there she would not speak to us for almost four days. Cute, funny little creatures. Feel better...

 

[Rsjm]

Ginger too was acting normal, it wasn’t until misty I realised he was missing toffee because of how normal he was acting. It does get better with time, it’s just different for every person, it took me time to realise I was doing what was best for toffee and that’s exactly what you did for your girl! You’ll never replace her and she’ll always be in your heart, I find myself talking about toffee alll the time. Gingers now happier than ever that he’s got a little mate again. But remember it’s your decision and what’s best for you and your bun. Plz keep us updated on everything and know you’re not alone if you need to talk

Hoppy spent the past 2 days with me in my room. He seldom does this, as he usually likes to hang outside my room or in my toilet. I can really sense his loneliness and it pains me. I woke up crying for the 3rd day in a row. It does get better in the day, but it’s the waking up knowing she’s not here anymore that pains me to death. There aren’t many rabbit societies in my area, when I checked there was only 1 senior bun (5 yo, hoppy is 8) up for adoption. Have arranged a viewing first to see how he reacts. Ultimately, i want to do what’s best for him rather than me. Holly will forever be in my heart, no matter how many other bunnies I rescue in future, she really is irreplaceable. Thank you for your kind and comforting words. I’m very glad to have the support of you and the people on this forum. Will definitely keep you guys updated. Might be kinda weird, but I’m arranging to get a tattoo of her done on me. Although I have many photos and videos of her, I’m really afraid of ever forgetting how she looks (my memory is real bad). It’s also my way of doing something in her memory

 

[Rsjm]

We had a similar situation with our last one. We had just gotten here GI back in shape after she was locked up. We had to stick syringes into her skin to feed water into her as the vet instructed. She was finally back to normal, but my wife had just left to go see her mother and I noticed our Allie-Bear "baby picture attached" lying on her side on the porch. That was not normal for her and I had just petted her while she was up in one of the spongy lounge chairs that she liked about ten minutes ago. Anyway, she was just about gone by the time I got to her. I hope that she was aware enough to feel comforted as I touched her before she passed.
That was very unexpected though. The vet did a minimal autopsy and said she died of a brain tumor or growth in her skull. Personally, I think it's probable that she jumped off the chair and smacked her head on the metal table or chair cross-leg. She was getting older but insisted on still jumping up and off of high furniture despite that she was getting rather uncoordinated in her old age. She loved heights and used to scare us half to death climbing up high things. We had just moved into a new place one time and had a queen mattress and boxspring leaning against the wall with boxes next to them. She got on the boxes then all the way up on top of the mattress, then started hunching down and staring at the floor getting ready to jump down. I had visions of broken bunny leg before I snatched her up.
Anyway, we felt some guilt too, but it was her time. And we spoiled her and loved her every day. She had a pretty good life, like your bun's I'm sure. I miss our little monster. I love the harlequin breed as much for their playfulness as their mischief. Our first one "****oo" had the strangest temper...very vindictive and stayed mad sometimes for days. I just have to share this ... I was remodeling virtually every room in the house, so I kept moving her cage and living area so I could work on the room she was in. She complained some depending on where I moved her, but once I chose the foyer at the front door. She hated that spot. She wouldn't eat, slammed her feet down, chewed on the cage bars and even after moving her from there she would not speak to us for almost four days. Cute, funny little creatures. Feel better...

I completely understand what you mean. I absolutely love it when holly gets mad, not on purpose of course. When hoppy (her husbun) pees on the floor beside her, and I have to wipe it with a towel, she gets so mad at the moving towel she bites and scratches at me whilst I’m cleaning. Sometimes she gets bad dreams and wakes up suddenly and just thumps for 5 minutes. Really amuses me! She loves to jump up to high places as well! But she never does jump off after getting up. Sometimes I put her pellets on my bed, so she slowly learnt to jump up to look for food. My bed is pretty high, so she can’t jump down but will dig and scratch my blankets to show her unhappiness till we carried her off. Bunnies really are amazing and funny creatures with special personalities. I’ve a dog and a cat as well, and even though they both make great pets, a bunnies personality is so much more unique and require much more understanding, in my opinion. Allie is adorable! Looking at baby pictures never fails to amaze me at how much they’ve grown in such a short time. I feel like a proud dad when looking at hollys baby pictures, and I’m sure you feel the same way too. If Holly ever meets Allie at the rainbow bridge, pretty sure they’d be good friends climbing up high places
Thank you for your love and support. Sending love to you too

 

[Allie_Bear]

I completely understand what you mean. I absolutely love it when holly gets mad, not on purpose of course. When hoppy (her husbun) pees on the floor beside her, and I have to wipe it with a towel, she gets so mad at the moving towel she bites and scratches at me whilst I’m cleaning. Sometimes she gets bad dreams and wakes up suddenly and just thumps for 5 minutes. Really amuses me! She loves to jump up to high places as well! But she never does jump off after getting up. Sometimes I put her pellets on my bed, so she slowly learnt to jump up to look for food. My bed is pretty high, so she can’t jump down but will dig and scratch my blankets to show her unhappiness till we carried her off. Bunnies really are amazing and funny creatures with special personalities. I’ve a dog and a cat as well, and even though they both make great pets, a bunnies personality is so much more unique and require much more understanding, in my opinion. Allie is adorable! Looking at baby pictures never fails to amaze me at how much they’ve grown in such a short time. I feel like a proud dad when looking at hollys baby pictures, and I’m sure you feel the same way too. If Holly ever meets Allie at the rainbow bridge, pretty sure they’d be good friends climbing up high places
Thank you for your love and support. Sending love to you too

Thank you. Regarding the baby pictures; I used to ask my wife all the time... "when is that little head going to grow to match her ears and feet?". Teasing Mommy's little baby can get one smacked.

 

[Rsjm]

Thank you. Regarding the baby pictures; I used to ask my wife all the time... "when is that little head going to grow to match her ears and feet?". Teasing Mommy's little baby can get one smacked.

Aww, im with Mommy on this one. My family always thought Holly was less beautiful as compared to Hoppy, but I thought she was beautiful in her own way nonetheless. Thankfully they didn't say anything to me and I didn't have to smack anyone
Have u had any bunnies since Allie passed?

 

[Allie_Bear]

Allie was the beauty queen, despite my teasing. Allie was our 2nd and last as of about 2 years. That's why I was inquiring about harlequin breeders near me. My wife and I are missing our bunnies.

 

[Mark Jackson]

I am so sorry. I lost my beautiful Daisy on Monday after 9 years. Her back leg gave up and she was wetting herself I had to clean her and brush her wet fur every day until the inevitable Had to happen. It’s now Saturday and I’m sill upset I don’t know how long this goes on for. She looks beautiful. I’ll enclose a pic. She has left behind her bonded partner who I’m watching very closely. I’ve bought a snuggle pad so replace the warmth. Take care.

 

[Allie_Bear]

I am so sorry. I lost my beautiful Daisy on Monday after 9 years. Her back leg gave up and she was wetting herself I had to clean her and brush her wet fur every day until the inevitable Had to happen. It’s now Saturday and I’m sill upset I don’t know how long this goes on for. She looks beautiful. I’ll enclose a pic. She has left behind her bonded partner who I’m watching very closely. I’ve bought a snuggle pad so replace the warmth. Take care.

She is beautiful. It takes some time to get past the worst of it, but time helps heal. Feel better !

 

[Rsjm]

Allie was the beauty queen, despite my teasing. Allie was our 2nd and last as of about 2 years. That's why I was inquiring about harlequin breeders near me. My wife and I are missing our bunnies.

I feel you. No matter what, they will always be the most beautiful to us. The phrase beauty lies within you never rang so true. I sincerely hope you will be able to find another bun to bring joy to your life soon!

 

[Rsjm]

I am so sorry. I lost my beautiful Daisy on Monday after 9 years. Her back leg gave up and she was wetting herself I had to clean her and brush her wet fur every day until the inevitable Had to happen. It’s now Saturday and I’m sill upset I don’t know how long this goes on for. She looks beautiful. I’ll enclose a pic. She has left behind her bonded partner who I’m watching very closely. I’ve bought a snuggle pad so replace the warmth. Take care.

I am sorry for your loss as well. Daisy looks beautiful as well, like Hoppy, Holly’s remaining bonded partner! Personally, I feel like shes taken a piece of my heart away with her, and things will never feel the same without her. I woke up for the 5th morning crying and filled with guilt. I will never feel the same, but that’s not a bad thing. It’s painful, but that’s life and I’ll learn to cope with it. Slowly, but surely. We give our beloved bunnies a piece of our hearts when they go, and if we don’t do it, who else will? We can’t change every bunnys life, but we can change the lives of those that we touch and love. Sending you my love and support, and may Daisy meet holly and binky free at the rainbow bridge!

 

[Imbrium]

I didn't have time to read this whole thread, but I read the first post...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I've lost two to stasis over the years and it's heartbreaking. Your story is almost identical to mine with my avatar bunny, Gazzles, back in 2014. She was a year and a half old with a history of GI stasis... I was treating a bout of stasis at home with simethicone (akin to ridwind), metoclopramide and metacam, plus syringe-feeding critical care and water. I ran to the store and left her home with my husband - just before I got home, he said she suddenly went limp, same as your precious lop. I tried to rush her to the emergency vet, cradling her in my arms and talking to her as I drove, but she died in my arms before I got very far. It broke my heart and I've struggled over the years with blaming myself for not catching this bout of stasis sooner... that feeling that there should be something you could've done differently to alter the outcome.

I was able to afford a necropsy at the time, so I wrapped her up, boxed her and kept her in the refrigerator overnight before driving her body to the vet the next morning. Just before I got there, the Alice in Chains song "Black gives way to blue" came on (for those unfamiliar, that song (and album) is mourning the passing of their original lead singer). Five years later, I still cry when I hear that song.

For what it's worth, Gaz died after going into shock and her necropsy revealed a blood clot in her intestines, which means there probably wasn't anything I could've done differently to change the outcome... and I suspect the same is true of your situation, no matter how hard it is for you to let yourself believe that. There's a lot of things that could've gone wrong for reasons unrelated to your massages. Clot, organ failure, cancer or who knows what else. Bunnies are terribly good at hiding symptoms until it's too late, so chances are there was a lot more to the whole picture than the bit you were able to see .

Do your best to forgive yourself for whatever you feel like you could've done differently, because she would want you to and because you do NOT deserve to carry around that guilt. You got seven wonderful years together and she died knowing she was loved and knowing that you were doing your best to help her. We've got a zoo's worth of pets and I'm convinced by my experiences that animals are aware when something is wrong with them and they definitely connect the dots between that and changes in your behavior related to caring for them - even though our beloved pets instinctively fight the syringe or whatever in the moment, they truly appreciate you tending to them when they're sick or hurt or dying.

Binky free, little one!

 

[Rsjm]

I didn't have time to read this whole thread, but I read the first post...

I'm so sorry for your loss. I've lost two to stasis over the years and it's heartbreaking. Your story is almost identical to mine with my avatar bunny, Gazzles, back in 2014. She was a year and a half old with a history of GI stasis... I was treating a bout of stasis at home with simethicone (akin to ridwind), metoclopramide and metacam, plus syringe-feeding critical care and water. I ran to the store and left her home with my husband - just before I got home, he said she suddenly went limp, same as your precious lop. I tried to rush her to the emergency vet, cradling her in my arms and talking to her as I drove, but she died in my arms before I got very far. It broke my heart and I've struggled over the years with blaming myself for not catching this bout of stasis sooner... that feeling that there should be something you could've done differently to alter the outcome.

I was able to afford a necropsy at the time, so I wrapped her up, boxed her and kept her in the refrigerator overnight before driving her body to the vet the next morning. Just before I got there, the Alice in Chains song "Black gives way to blue" came on (for those unfamiliar, that song (and album) is mourning the passing of their original lead singer). Five years later, I still cry when I hear that song.

For what it's worth, Gaz died after going into shock and her necropsy revealed a blood clot in her intestines, which means there probably wasn't anything I could've done differently to change the outcome... and I suspect the same is true of your situation, no matter how hard it is for you to let yourself believe that. There's a lot of things that could've gone wrong for reasons unrelated to your massages. Clot, organ failure, cancer or who knows what else. Bunnies are terribly good at hiding symptoms until it's too late, so chances are there was a lot more to the whole picture than the bit you were able to see .

Do your best to forgive yourself for whatever you feel like you could've done differently, because she would want you to and because you do NOT deserve to carry around that guilt. You got seven wonderful years together and she died knowing she was loved and knowing that you were doing your best to help her. We've got a zoo's worth of pets and I'm convinced by my experiences that animals are aware when something is wrong with them and they definitely connect the dots between that and changes in your behavior related to caring for them - even though our beloved pets instinctively fight the syringe or whatever in the moment, they truly appreciate you tending to them when they're sick or hurt or dying.

Binky free, little one!

Thank you Jennifer, this means the world to me. I've been thinking of what Holly was going through in her last few moments, and what she could have been thinking of, and I kept thinking to myself, what if she thought that the massages were making her sick? what if she thought I was making her unwell and uncomfortable? those thoughts really made me so, so upset. She's always been my baby and forever will be, and I would be so upset to know that she passed on mad or angry at me for causing her discomfort or not saving her. After reading what you said, i feel slightly comforted, and I really hope that she knew she was loved and we were trying to help, even in her last few moments.

She had a few prior bouts of stasis, and to be fair she never ate much of her veggies and hay, and liked to steal her hus-bun's share pellets. So she didn't exactly have a healthiest of diets, and it could have been very possible that there was something else bothering her and she wasn't showing it. I know how everyone says i shouldn't blame myself or carry the guilt, but its so, so hard to especially when there are so many things that I feel i could have done better or changed if I could have gone back in time. I will try to though, and im really thankful for your kind words and support and what you and everyone have been doing and saying to me. It's been a rough 5 days and im still very emotional, but im working through it and trying to get on with life. I just heard the song, and indeed it is a sad song. I was looking through your photos (had to see more of gazzles as she looks so similar to Holly's widowed hus-bun), and she was really an adorable baby buns, and I can only imagine the heartbreak you went through losing her.. Im sure gazzles meant a lot to you, if the song still makes you cry and think of her 5 years on, and that you and her still share a very strong bond to this date. One of my biggest fears is that i'll forget how much Holly means to me, and i don't want that. I want to still cry over her 5, 10, maybe even 30 years from now, maybe not out of pain, but out of happiness remembering all the happy times we shared. Thank you again, for sharing your experience with me. I'm sure it wasn't easy recounting it, but I want to let you know I really do appreciate it, and i can sincerely say that it has made me feel a bit better. I hope Gazzles is binkying happily at the rainbow bridge with Holly, and sending love to you and the your current buns now <3

 

[Imbrium]

I'm so glad it helped to hear that they seem to know when you're trying to make them feel better . Though I have anecdotal evidence from cats, rabbits and small birds as well, one of the best stories I have in that regard is from a sugar glider, Hobbes. We hadn't had him very long at the time and while his cage-mate Hurricane has been a sweetheart from the day I got her, Hobbes was unaccustomed to being handled and was both afraid and aggressively unbonded to us (as in hand-greeted-with-lunging-teeth-that-lock-on-like-a-vice-grip unbonded).

One morning (must've been pretty early, since they were still awake), I was watching the gliders in their cage and I noticed Hobbes hunching up and making this weird hissing/clicking noise I'd never heard before. I watched for a couple minutes and it looked to me like he was constipated and trying to poop was causing him pain. So, off to the exotics vet we went. He did NOT want to go and was a real pill about everything - scared and lashing out as he got poked and prodded, the poor thing. After a physical exam, he got x-rayed, briefly sedated and got a scope shoved up his bum. He was diagnosed with enteritis (inflammation of his colon) and sent home with and Metacam (pain killer) and Flagyl (antibiotic... I put my foot down about 'no Baytril' after a previous bad experience giving it to a sugar glider).

Anyway, we get home and I've gotta medicate this sick and angry and terrified glider who would like nothing more than to see my fingers gushing blood. Thankfully, I had some feeding tips (cannula tips), which make getting a 1 ml syringe into a very small mouth infinitely easier. I kept him in his snugly fleece sleeping pouch, using it like a glove... without letting him get loose enough to attack, I had to get the feeding tip into his mouth and squeeze in a couple drops of icky medication before he could jerk away. A very nerve-wracking experience for both of us! I think it goes without saying that he was not a fan of this. At ALL.

24 hours later, I go to repeat this process... but when the tip of the syringe approached his face, his mouth popped wide open! From that day forward, he was never as vicious towards me as he had been before he got sick.

If something with a brain not much bigger than a pea can connect the dots between being force-fed nasty stuff and not feeling miserable any more... and a cat who would normally quite literally try to kill you for attempting to bathe them suddenly tolerates it when they're infested with fleas... then surely our bunnies understand the correlation between being miserable and having a human do unusual things to them.

I actually used to refer to Gaz as our 'Munchausen' bunny because she was prone to gas and the early warning signs of stasis. Sometimes she'd seem a little off and shun a treat like her appetite was reduced and I'd whip out the first aid kit to start trying home remedies... then as soon as I'd dosed her with simethicone and/or probiotics (before they could even have taken effect and without getting pain meds yet) she'd suddenly be back to normal! It seemed as though there were times when she just wanted the attention or to feel like she'd gotten something special from me .

 

[Rsjm]

I'm so glad it helped to hear that they seem to know when you're trying to make them feel better . Though I have anecdotal evidence from cats, rabbits and small birds as well, one of the best stories I have in that regard is from a sugar glider, Hobbes. We hadn't had him very long at the time and while his cage-mate Hurricane has been a sweetheart from the day I got her, Hobbes was unaccustomed to being handled and was both afraid and aggressively unbonded to us (as in hand-greeted-with-lunging-teeth-that-lock-on-like-a-vice-grip unbonded).

One morning (must've been pretty early, since they were still awake), I was watching the gliders in their cage and I noticed Hobbes hunching up and making this weird hissing/clicking noise I'd never heard before. I watched for a couple minutes and it looked to me like he was constipated and trying to poop was causing him pain. So, off to the exotics vet we went. He did NOT want to go and was a real pill about everything - scared and lashing out as he got poked and prodded, the poor thing. After a physical exam, he got x-rayed, briefly sedated and got a scope shoved up his bum. He was diagnosed with enteritis (inflammation of his colon) and sent home with and Metacam (pain killer) and Flagyl (antibiotic... I put my foot down about 'no Baytril' after a previous bad experience giving it to a sugar glider).

Anyway, we get home and I've gotta medicate this sick and angry and terrified glider who would like nothing more than to see my fingers gushing blood. Thankfully, I had some feeding tips (cannula tips), which make getting a 1 ml syringe into a very small mouth infinitely easier. I kept him in his snugly fleece sleeping pouch, using it like a glove... without letting him get loose enough to attack, I had to get the feeding tip into his mouth and squeeze in a couple drops of icky medication before he could jerk away. A very nerve-wracking experience for both of us! I think it goes without saying that he was not a fan of this. At ALL.

24 hours later, I go to repeat this process... but when the tip of the syringe approached his face, his mouth popped wide open! From that day forward, he was never as vicious towards me as he had been before he got sick.

If something with a brain not much bigger than a pea can connect the dots between being force-fed nasty stuff and not feeling miserable any more... and a cat who would normally quite literally try to kill you for attempting to bathe them suddenly tolerates it when they're infested with fleas... then surely our bunnies understand the correlation between being miserable and having a human do unusual things to them.

I actually used to refer to Gaz as our 'Munchausen' bunny because she was prone to gas and the early warning signs of stasis. Sometimes she'd seem a little off and shun a treat like her appetite was reduced and I'd whip out the first aid kit to start trying home remedies... then as soon as I'd dosed her with simethicone and/or probiotics (before they could even have taken effect and without getting pain meds yet) she'd suddenly be back to normal! It seemed as though there were times when she just wanted the attention or to feel like she'd gotten something special from me .

I agree with you completely, not just rabbits, but animals have an ability to understand care and love in ways we can't fathom.. Holly used to do the same with her all mini stasis bouts, pretty sure a few of them were for attention! My remaining buns has been hanging out in my room every single day since Holly's passing, and i brought him to the vet to get a check up to make sure hes okay. Vet said hes very healthy for a senior bun, but his tear duct was clogged and i've to apply eye drops now. Its nothing much, but he absolutely HATES being handled and would disappear from our sight for 1-2 days after we bring him to the vet or grooming. But now he seemed to have changed and hes now much more receptive to being handled, and probably gets mad for about 10 mins and all is good after. Definitely not as aggressive as Hobbes, (he had his teeth removed so im not sure if he'd bite me or not haha) but I can feel the change in his attitude towards us ever since his bun-wife passed and knowing that we're here for him.

Just to give everyone an update, i've been very busy catching up on work the last few days (since i spent the last week in pain and upset and did not do any work whatsoever...), but i've slowly begun to accept that Holly was indeed a senior bun, and it was her time. Every bun owner and vet i've spoken to all said bunnies start getting old and having health issues around age 6 onwards, but I guess i've always seen them as babies and failed to understand that they were getting on in age.. The vet said Hoppy was very healthy for an 8 year old bun, so I guess I kinda expected Holly to be that healthy as well. The pain is much less now, but I still think of her everyday imagining her in places she used to be ): I've been pondering the idea of starting a charity/social enterprise for a few months, and might be strange to say but Holly's passing was the catalyst for me taking active steps to bring it to action and life in memory of her. I hope to share more details with you guys in future, im in a different continent so it might not be applicable to you guys, but would like to say I truly appreciate all the kind words of love and support i've had the last week and I wouldn't be feeling better without each and everyone of your words and support. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

 

[D OB]

This is a very long post, but I need to find the words to describe the situation, I apologise if it is too lengthy.

My beloved 7 and a half year of lop passed away Wednesday noon.. i didn’t order a post mortem to find the exact cause of death, in part cause of financial constraints, and also partly cuz I didn’t want to find out the reason why (how much of my fault it was..) I just know it was due to her bloat/ GI stasis.

I have 2 rabbits, and she was a joy in my life. I can’t believe she’s gone. She’s had a few rounds of GI stasis throughout the years, and after the first few times with visits to the vet, I learnt to treat her myself with belly massages as well as syringe feeding her with water and food.

On Tuesday around 6pm, I realised she was pooping large soft masses that stuck to her butt. She was clearly uncomfortable and did not want to eat, drink, or move. I left her for a while and waited till evening to see if it fit better/worse. At 10pm, she was still the same. So I syringe fed her some water and massages. She didn’t seem weak, the usual bunny-loaf posture and could still hop around to find her comfortable spot/position.

On Wednesday morning (about 12 hours after symptoms appeared) i woke up to find her in the same place as the night before, staying there for the whole night. I massaged her a little more, and thought that I should give it a bit more time before bringing her to the vet, since it’s only been 12 hours and her bouts usually lasted 24-36 hours before getting better with home treatment.

I went out to get some ridwind, and gave her a long belly massage before feeding her the ridwind at 1130am on wednesday. Up till that point, she was in her bunny-loaf position. She looked upset and clearly uncomfortable, but did not look weak or dying.

I went to take a shower, and was gonna take her to the vet after that. When I came out, she was sprawled on the ground looking very weak with her paws sprawled all over. I panicked, and ldrove as fast as I could to the vet （30min drive)

My beloved bunny passed away on the way to the vet, less than 24 hours after she started exhibiting symptoms, and barely 30mins after the last round of massages and ridwind. I can’t help but think that instead of helping her, I made her condition worse. The massages worsened the bloat/stasis instead of helping her. That’s the only reason I can think of that her condition worsened so quickly in less than 24 hours.

I can’t get over it, and I don’t know if I ever will. My lovely bunny had a good few more years with us, and I let her down by failing to get her to the vet on time. I had a similar situation many years ago, where my puppy passed away on the way to the vet too. Coincidentally, it was on the same date. 23rd October 2002. I blamed myself for not being faster, not catching onto the signs earlier. Tried to show my other rabbit that she’s gone, but he can’t seem to understand and it breaks my heart.

My lovely bunny only had me to count on, and I let her down. I work from home so I spend about 8 hours with my bunnies everyday running around my room. I am devastated and I’ve been telling myself this is just a bad dream, and I’ll wake up from it. No words can describe the pain and grief I feel right now. What do I do from here, how do I overcome the guilt? How do I continue living my life, cuz I can’t imagine life without her right now, especially when her life ended prematurely due to my own mistake.

please reply with pictures of your bunnies as well, it would mean a lot to me..

I’m so sorry for loss. Shes beautiful and gave you so much. Please don’t feel bad. I’m trying to cope with loosing my 3 month old lop, Fitzgerald. He was a real source of happiness for me, we didn’t have a lot of time together, but I can’t tell you what he means to me.

Every day is a real struggle . He had GI stasis too, he was up and down and I thought he was ok, the vet did too( I took him to 2) but nothing I tried helped. I don’t think I’ll ever get over the loss. And you won’t either. Because that’s how much they meant to us. But I need you to know that you did everything right. Everything. I know you feel bad and I do too, but you did everything right. Sometimes things just happen. The loss is immeasurable. But you’re a great person, and she knew you loved and adored her, and were thing to help her. Please know that. You’re not alone. The loss is overwhelming

 

[Nicole17]

I lost one of my bunnies just yesterday I hope you feel better soon and know that you’re not alone in the way you feel. We’ll get through this tough time.

 

[FinnegansMom]

OH MY GOODNESS, I AM SOOOOOO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS! I lost my beloved Sassafras last December and I too blamed myself. What should I have done differently, should I have taken her to the vet sooner, how did I miss this issue and why didn't I be a better bun mom. Oh yeah I blamed myself, I had just started a new job 100 miles away and wasn't spending as much time with her so I missed the signs. My husband called me at work to let me know she wasn't feeling well and he was worried. As soon as I came home and went to her I could hear her teeth grinding, not purring, grinding and I knew she was in pain. We drove an hour to the nearest emergency vet. They hydrated her and gave some medicine and we came home and I slept in her playyard with her all night stroking her and just telling her over and over I was so sorry. I also gave her syringes of water and critical care for two days. Then she started going down hill fast and I took her to an expert in rabbits in Fairfax on the way to my job near DC.

As soon as the vet saw her I saw her face and I knew what she was going to say. She told me she had a tumor on the back of her eye and I was floored because I just took her to the vet eye specialists and they said nothing that she just had a cataract that caused her blindness in one eye. I asked was she in pain and she said yes, very much. I asked was there anyway to save her and the vet said it would take a very very long time and a lot of money and even then there is no guarantee. She would have to stay with the vet for months. I asked did she recommend to put her down and she answered yes. I burst into tears and said just do it I don't want her to suffer. So they gave me a few minutes while I held her on my chest and loved on her and told her how sorry I was that I wasn't a better mom to her but that she changed my life and I would never forget her. Then the vet gave her the injection and carefully listened to her heart while I said good bye and I loved her. They had to give her another shot because she wouldn't let go and I panicked should I try to save her but the vet said it was better to let her go so she gave her the second injection and she was gone in a few seconds.

For the next month I felt like I couldn't breath, my chest hurt constantly, I cried everyday all day on and off even while at work. She was such a part of my day and my life I just couldn't imagine living my life without her and I didn't want to. I just wanted to die too and they guilt I felt was overwhelming. After a few weeks I began to feel a little better because I began taking antidepressants. I just stayed on them until I didn't feel I needed them anymore. In January I was just looking at a breeder near me and the baby bunnies and I said I'm not sure when I will be ready to have another but when I see him I'll know it's time. So almost the end of the month she contacted me with a little guy to see if I wanted him and as soon as I saw him I knew he was my little guy. I've had Finnegan since February 15th of this year and he is the love of my life. It's a different experience because he's a different bunny in personality, gender and breed. I don't feel guilty or that I am betraying Sassy. I actually had a drawing made of Sassy that I have on my wall as a memorial and I talk to Finnegan about Sassy and I wonder if they would have gotten along. She was pretty bossy. lol

I still miss Sassy and teared up while telling you about my precious girl, she was only 4. So young, she barely lived. I still blame myself for her deteriorating so quickly and that I let her down but I also learned from that experience so I made sure I read everything I could about nutrition, health and warning signs. My vet is actually the vet that The House Rabbit Society used to compile a list of Rabbit knowledgeable and trained vets in each state so I feel very fortunate for my Finnegan. Only the best for him.

It is going to take time....a lot of time but you will feel better and start to smile again when you think of your precious one. It's good that you have others to comfort you that should help. I suddenly didn't have any thing to take care of at all so I think that made the loss and emptiness I felt even worse. I kept hearing her or looking for her out of habit but eventually that stopped after I got Finnegan because I was listening for him.

I wish you peace in your heart and mind as you heal from this huge loss. My prayers are with you.

 

[Duckfarmer1]

Ok, I have just lost 14 rabbits thru GIStasis and I’ll tell you what...I thought I was prepared...but I wasn’t..next time.. I know everything now...I am an expert unfortunately now from everything I was forced to learn. We have a hobby farm and I have..had 32 bunnies..I give them away for fun...they are such a joy..please please do not beat yourself up..that disease comes on so fast..this was my third time dealing with it..each time is different..so you had no way to know it would go that fast..focus on her good years..please...and get a new bunny..do you live anywhere near NWPA. I’d love to give you one. Here some of mine there’s even a bad picture of Sally my house bunny..her litter mates died so I brought her in..she loves it but I just haven’t gotten a good picture yet..lolI hope just one of these pictures will make you smile. Hope to hear more from you tomorrow

 

[Rsjm]

OH MY GOODNESS, I AM SOOOOOO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS! I lost my beloved Sassafras last December and I too blamed myself. What should I have done differently, should I have taken her to the vet sooner, how did I miss this issue and why didn't I be a better bun mom. Oh yeah I blamed myself, I had just started a new job 100 miles away and wasn't spending as much time with her so I missed the signs. My husband called me at work to let me know she wasn't feeling well and he was worried. As soon as I came home and went to her I could hear her teeth grinding, not purring, grinding and I knew she was in pain. We drove an hour to the nearest emergency vet. They hydrated her and gave some medicine and we came home and I slept in her playyard with her all night stroking her and just telling her over and over I was so sorry. I also gave her syringes of water and critical care for two days. Then she started going down hill fast and I took her to an expert in rabbits in Fairfax on the way to my job near DC.

As soon as the vet saw her I saw her face and I knew what she was going to say. She told me she had a tumor on the back of her eye and I was floored because I just took her to the vet eye specialists and they said nothing that she just had a cataract that caused her blindness in one eye. I asked was she in pain and she said yes, very much. I asked was there anyway to save her and the vet said it would take a very very long time and a lot of money and even then there is no guarantee. She would have to stay with the vet for months. I asked did she recommend to put her down and she answered yes. I burst into tears and said just do it I don't want her to suffer. So they gave me a few minutes while I held her on my chest and loved on her and told her how sorry I was that I wasn't a better mom to her but that she changed my life and I would never forget her. Then the vet gave her the injection and carefully listened to her heart while I said good bye and I loved her. They had to give her another shot because she wouldn't let go and I panicked should I try to save her but the vet said it was better to let her go so she gave her the second injection and she was gone in a few seconds.

For the next month I felt like I couldn't breath, my chest hurt constantly, I cried everyday all day on and off even while at work. She was such a part of my day and my life I just couldn't imagine living my life without her and I didn't want to. I just wanted to die too and they guilt I felt was overwhelming. After a few weeks I began to feel a little better because I began taking antidepressants. I just stayed on them until I didn't feel I needed them anymore. In January I was just looking at a breeder near me and the baby bunnies and I said I'm not sure when I will be ready to have another but when I see him I'll know it's time. So almost the end of the month she contacted me with a little guy to see if I wanted him and as soon as I saw him I knew he was my little guy. I've had Finnegan since February 15th of this year and he is the love of my life. It's a different experience because he's a different bunny in personality, gender and breed. I don't feel guilty or that I am betraying Sassy. I actually had a drawing made of Sassy that I have on my wall as a memorial and I talk to Finnegan about Sassy and I wonder if they would have gotten along. She was pretty bossy. lol

I still miss Sassy and teared up while telling you about my precious girl, she was only 4. So young, she barely lived. I still blame myself for her deteriorating so quickly and that I let her down but I also learned from that experience so I made sure I read everything I could about nutrition, health and warning signs. My vet is actually the vet that The House Rabbit Society used to compile a list of Rabbit knowledgeable and trained vets in each state so I feel very fortunate for my Finnegan. Only the best for him.

It is going to take time....a lot of time but you will feel better and start to smile again when you think of your precious one. It's good that you have others to comfort you that should help. I suddenly didn't have any thing to take care of at all so I think that made the loss and emptiness I felt even worse. I kept hearing her or looking for her out of habit but eventually that stopped after I got Finnegan because I was listening for him.

I wish you peace in your heart and mind as you heal from this huge loss. My prayers are with you.View attachment 43853 View attachment 43854 View attachment 43855

i am so, so sorry for your loss! Sassa sounded like an absolute boss! I completely understand you and feel for you. It’s been almost 2 weeks, and I still feel the pain and I’m trying to avoid things that will make me think of the experience of bringing her to the vet when she passed.. such as driving the same road etc.. I don’t know I can’t really put into words how I feel right now, have been pretty numb.. but i still see her all around the house. I get occasional sadness and just not feel like doing anything when I think of her, but apart from that the pain does seemed to have gone away a bit.

I actually brought her surviving partner to try matchmake him with a new companion this past weekend, if anything maybe just to get him to interact and be social for a bit. He couldn’t get along with any of the other buns.. makes me appreciate and miss Holly more, and what a special relationship those 2 had. She’ll never be replaced in my heart, and I’m sure sassa would never be for you too. Like you said bunnies are so unique in their personalities and they’re all special in their own little ways.. it surprises me how such small creatures are so unique, and yet get shown so little love. I had Holly cremated and have a little urn with her ashes in my room where she likes to hang around, and I still speak to her daily, although I know she isn’t here. That might be a bit weird to others.. :/

thank you for taking the time to share sassy’s story with me, I appreciate it <3
As bun parents we all have to one day go through the hard part of letting them go, and I’m thankful to have this community’s support, and I’m sure you have it too. Please let me know if anything, if you’d like to share more about sassy, if it makes u feel better or remember her again. I’d be more than happy too, and I’ve been recounting holly’s stories and memories with my partner and friends. It does make me a little bit happier, knowing that all we had were happy memories together. Sassy looks adorable, and that’s a really nice sketch of her!! I’ve been trying to find a good picture of holly to print/draw, but unfortunately she didn’t have any good angles for photos.. She wasn’t very photogenic sending love to Finn as well, send pictures so we can see how he looks like! :’)