TinysMom
Well-Known Member
I thought about posting this last week when Calypso died - but truth be told - I wasn't ready to do this thread - and the forum had lost some beloved bunnies that we've known for years (Scone and S'mores) and I didn't want to take attention away from their losses. I felt folks had enough of a shock from Scone and enough grief from S'mores...that I could wait on this...so I only posted in my blog.
Calypso was really called a different name - Iberia's Gilda - but she didn't like that name (and we didn't either) and while working with an animal communicator to prepare her and another doe for the flight here to Texas - we found out she liked the name Calypso...so that became her new name.
Calypso's passing has been really hard for me - it was a shock because there were no warning signs - and because she was going to be the start of one of my new lines of flemish giants (to create my own lines). It felt like I not only lost her - but I lost that dream...and I've not been handling it well.
A bit about Calypso...she and Harmony spent a month at Ali's (JadeIcing) before I was able to ship them here - and she and Ali really bonded. Even after Calypso got here and had been here a while - I could tell that she missed Ali. So often I thought about just sending her back because I knew she missed Ali - even though I tried to love on her a lot. I felt guilty too because I found myself bonding with Harmony - a truly diva bunny (who has become a lovebug now with me - even if she can't play nice with other bunnies).
Last Wednesday, I went into the rabbitry and reached down into Calypso's cage to pet her - and I noticed she had collapsed by the door. I touched her and she was BURNING UP hot...not just a fever - but burning up. Her heart was racing even though it was shallow. Robin got there within seconds...but she was unconscious the whole time and within seconds after Robin got there - she was gone.
For the last several days - I've been discussing this with several folks and we've been going back and forth on what it could've been. Flemmies are known for heart attacks - but she was only a year old. Nothing had happened to scare her - the dogs hadn't barked or anything like that.
But when I'd tried to breed her days earlier - she whimpered. I assumed she thought she was pregnant from when I'd tried to breed her before...so I took her out of the cage (I had not been able to feel any babies).
Looking back now - I think she had an infection - whether it was a uterine infection or something else - I don't know. But she was burning up so hot - like if you were to touch a person's forehead when they had a temperature of 103 or something - it had to have been that.
She hid it well from me - she'd been eating/drinking/pooping/peeing. That morning she'd periscoped for her treat and even took seconds from me.
I don't understand it - I mean - I do - with my head. But my heart - is shattered. Flemmies take up such a big part of my heart (ok - so do others) - that when something like this happens - I question everything about myself. Why do I allow myself to have rabbits? Should I just give them all up? I must be a horrible person.
I'm finally doing ok - somewhat - today. I'm still crying.
But I'm not blaming myself. Had I known she was ill - I would have done everything possible to save her.
Truth be told - I think part of it was a heart problem - to this day - I think she loved Ali so much and missed her so much - that she was heartbroken. I find myself wishing I'd offered her back to Ali..not that Ali could've kept her due to their situation and they need to keep space open for fostering...
Anyway - Binky free Calypso - I hope you & Tiny & Puck & Samantha and all the others are having a blast up there. Somehow - I picture you more with Puck than with Tiny...I think you'd have his sense of humor or something...
Here are the first pictures I had of her - when Juan offered her to me. I know Ali has more - I'm hoping she can share them - and maybe a bit about her time with Calypso there.
I need to look it up - but I think she passed on her birthday - if not then - then within a day or two of her first birthday.
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Calypso was really called a different name - Iberia's Gilda - but she didn't like that name (and we didn't either) and while working with an animal communicator to prepare her and another doe for the flight here to Texas - we found out she liked the name Calypso...so that became her new name.
Calypso's passing has been really hard for me - it was a shock because there were no warning signs - and because she was going to be the start of one of my new lines of flemish giants (to create my own lines). It felt like I not only lost her - but I lost that dream...and I've not been handling it well.
A bit about Calypso...she and Harmony spent a month at Ali's (JadeIcing) before I was able to ship them here - and she and Ali really bonded. Even after Calypso got here and had been here a while - I could tell that she missed Ali. So often I thought about just sending her back because I knew she missed Ali - even though I tried to love on her a lot. I felt guilty too because I found myself bonding with Harmony - a truly diva bunny (who has become a lovebug now with me - even if she can't play nice with other bunnies).
Last Wednesday, I went into the rabbitry and reached down into Calypso's cage to pet her - and I noticed she had collapsed by the door. I touched her and she was BURNING UP hot...not just a fever - but burning up. Her heart was racing even though it was shallow. Robin got there within seconds...but she was unconscious the whole time and within seconds after Robin got there - she was gone.
For the last several days - I've been discussing this with several folks and we've been going back and forth on what it could've been. Flemmies are known for heart attacks - but she was only a year old. Nothing had happened to scare her - the dogs hadn't barked or anything like that.
But when I'd tried to breed her days earlier - she whimpered. I assumed she thought she was pregnant from when I'd tried to breed her before...so I took her out of the cage (I had not been able to feel any babies).
Looking back now - I think she had an infection - whether it was a uterine infection or something else - I don't know. But she was burning up so hot - like if you were to touch a person's forehead when they had a temperature of 103 or something - it had to have been that.
She hid it well from me - she'd been eating/drinking/pooping/peeing. That morning she'd periscoped for her treat and even took seconds from me.
I don't understand it - I mean - I do - with my head. But my heart - is shattered. Flemmies take up such a big part of my heart (ok - so do others) - that when something like this happens - I question everything about myself. Why do I allow myself to have rabbits? Should I just give them all up? I must be a horrible person.
I'm finally doing ok - somewhat - today. I'm still crying.
But I'm not blaming myself. Had I known she was ill - I would have done everything possible to save her.
Truth be told - I think part of it was a heart problem - to this day - I think she loved Ali so much and missed her so much - that she was heartbroken. I find myself wishing I'd offered her back to Ali..not that Ali could've kept her due to their situation and they need to keep space open for fostering...
Anyway - Binky free Calypso - I hope you & Tiny & Puck & Samantha and all the others are having a blast up there. Somehow - I picture you more with Puck than with Tiny...I think you'd have his sense of humor or something...
Here are the first pictures I had of her - when Juan offered her to me. I know Ali has more - I'm hoping she can share them - and maybe a bit about her time with Calypso there.
I need to look it up - but I think she passed on her birthday - if not then - then within a day or two of her first birthday.
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ray:
