14 year old daughter driving me crazy

[bat42072]

My 14 year old got suspended last week.. This girl hit her over a boy and my daughter beat the crap out of her... she was suspended for three days the other girl got a ticket... now my daughter got a ticket for disrupting the class and has to go see the judge onfeb. 25... she accidently threw away her homework away when she cleaned out her notebook in class the teacher told her to get it out of the trash and she told the teacher she was not sticking her hand in the nasty f****** garbage... she got sent to the office and got in a screaming match there with the ast. principle and then screamed at the school police officer... they gave her on school suspension... I know this is no excuse but she has adhd and the doctor is trying to adjust her meds. I will be in the nut house before we find the right dosage... she is grounded right now and treating every one like crap around here... I want to go on a long vacation and leave her here with her father but i can't...

 

[pamnock]

My heart goes out to you and may God give you strength during these "terrible teen with ADHD" years.

Are you sure you can't get away for a "little"hiatus until your daughter reaches her early 20's and mellows out a little?





Pam

 

[bat42072]

I wish... lol I ave a 16,14, and 11 year old all girls,, lord help me...

I told my family today I was goind to stay at my moms until they treat me with respect

 

[pamnock]

bat42072 wrote:

I wish... lol I ave a 16,14, and 11 year old all girls,, lord help me...

16, 14, 11 - All girls??? How have you been able to maintain your sanity?????????



Pam

 

[trailsend]

My heart goes out to you too! I can only imagine the stress. This is why I only deal with my nices, they are in their teens now and cause me enough worry and stress.I hope they get her meds straightened out, I'm sure that is not helping anything. Ah, sorry the difficult phase has set in... I wish girls could just *skip* it... if only they could see past their teenage years...

 

[bat42072]

it is really hard... The oldest one is in drivers ed. i really don't want her driving... I make hubby take her to practice...lol... the 11 year old is still good... but for how long? Oh well still gotta love them... Keeping the boys away is even harder... the only other teenagers in our neighborhood is... you guessed it.... the dreaded....BOOOOYYYYSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[undergunfire]

I am so sorry, girls can be "all-out" now-a-days.


I sooo hope I have a boy when we decide to have a baby.

 

[Brandy456]

..Comming from a teenager.

Highschool sucks. Alot of kids try and get you in trouble while presenting the teacher as innocent and getting the other one in trouble.

You may say "Why dint she tell"...No one does that. If you do you get classed as a 'Snitch' and a whole lotta people retaliate. I know Fighting wasent the right answer but its probably better then what could have happend in the future. (Im not saying what she did was right)

Anyways, Good Luck

Brandy

P.S Why don't you go on strike??

Lol

 

[bat42072]

I don't have a problem with defending your self... she would have gotten suspended even if she didn't fight back... I girl attacked her last year in the resetroom after months of threatening her and we warned the office that this was going on and they did nothing... so we told them what we told are daughter.. you don't ever hit first but you can defend your self...My daughter waited for this girl to leave the bathroom so she could go in (my daughter had heels on) this girl who is way bigger than my 90 lbs daughter pushed her down and proceeded to kick her in the stomach so my daughter gave that girl a black eye... my daughter ended up with this softball size knot on her stomach and the school didn't call the police or ambulance... when I got there i took her to the er... and she missed a week of school... this time this other girl was bigger but she didn't let her hurt her... I hate to say it i was proud that she can defend herself... Sarah ( my daughter) under normal circumstances loves everyone and everything... kids usually give her a hard time because she is not as mature sometimes as most kids her age... she tries though... sometimes it wears on me because usaully hubby is working out of town and i have to deal with it all...

It used to be no one would let her spend the night at there house because they couldn't handle her but now she gets to ... and she has had a very rough child hood... when she was a baby she got 2nd and third degree burns on both feet , hand and thighs at her grandmas house and she had to learn to walk all over again and will have to have plastic surgery on one ankle when she is finished growing... then she got kicked in the ribs by a horse when she was older... she really is a miracle child... the doctor said if it hit her dead on it would have killed her... there was ahoof print on her ribs and it cut her for a flip... she didn't even get a cracked rib... she has an angel watching over her...

i am thinking i may go back to work so i can get a break..lol

 

[Brandy456]

bat42072 wrote:

i am thinking i may go back to work so i can get a break..lol





You dont hear that much lol

 

[Saffy]

Motherhood is SO SO hard ... well, parenthood ... The stresses we have had with our 19 year old has made me advise everyone never to have children. Wish I'd stuck with rabbits!!! :biggrin2:

 

[Wabbitdad12]

Saffy wrote:

Motherhood is SO SO hard ... well, parenthood ... The stresses we have had with our 19 year old has made me advise everyone never to have children. Wish I'd stuck with rabbits!!! :biggrin2:

Amen!

My 19 year old son, knows more about life then mom & dad, he decided to move out last year, my 16 year old son, knows mom & dad don't know anything and my 13 year old daughter still thinks mom & dad know some things.

I empathize with you. My 16 year old son has issues with certain teachers, but has so far has kept his mouth shut, he just saves it all forthe family when he gets home.

I asked my wife, if we could takeour daughter, the rabbits and dogs and move when he's at work. She was tempted...for a little while.

Last year I was contacted by the Air Force to voluntarily comeoff of retirement and back intoactive duty, I declined, there are days I wish I had.

I do hope things get better for you bat42072.

 

[bat42072]

well things seem a little better... she apologized to her teacher.... and the ast. principle asked her when her court date is and said he would speak on her behalf... we will see what happens at court....

her insurance changed and guess what her doctor doesn't accept it so now we have to go to a new doctor... ooh joy... Starting over...

 

[Bo B Bunny]

Um, it might be a good thing that your doctor is going to change. no medicine we've used has caused that sort of behavior. It doesn't sound like an ADHD problem as much as behavioral issues - cussing a teacher like that?

Has she been CLINICALLY DIAGNOSED?by a child psychologist? tested with something like the Stanford-Binet test?

Has she had bloodwork for ruling out thyroid, lead poisoning or other health issues?

There are WAY too many children diagnosed by one or two symptoms in a doctor's office or school and I wouldn't trust something other than the things I mention.

What medicine is she on at the moment that you think might have caused this sort of behavior and how long was/has she been on it?

Has she always had issues with inattentiveness? behavior? disorganization? impulsivity? being defiant?

14 is really late for someone to diagnose this sort of thing. Like,a lot ofkids are getting a bit better by that age.

 

[missyscove]

Coming from a 17 year old girl... at an all-girls school, yes, I spend the day with 400 girls, I sympathize with most of what you mentioned, though I don't really know of any physical fighting within my school, it happens more at the all-boys schools. Girls usually utilize our amazing talent of fighting without touching eathother or speaking to eachother.
I wish you and your family the very best of luck. It's all really about luck. Honestly, sometimes I look at myself and I look at other people I know who do a lot more partying and such than I do and I wonder how I turned out so well. Honestly, I hope when I'm a parent I end up with a kid like me, because I wouldn't know what to do with a kid like some people I know.

 

[JAK Rabbitry]

Have you tried having her neutered?

 

[Bo B Bunny]

:laugh:

JAK Rabbitry wrote:

Have you tried having her neutered?

 

[JAK Rabbitry]

If I can't have my children altered, I'm clearly birthing the wrong species.

 

[bat42072]

Bo B Bunny wrote:

Um, it might be a good thing that your doctor is going to change. no medicine we've used has caused that sort of behavior. It doesn't sound like an ADHD problem as much as behavioral issues - cussing a teacher like that?

Has she been CLINICALLY DIAGNOSED?by a child psychologist? tested with something like the Stanford-Binet test?

Has she had bloodwork for ruling out thyroid, lead poisoning or other health issues?

There are WAY too many children diagnosed by one or two symptoms in a doctor's office or school and I wouldn't trust something other than the things I mention.

What medicine is she on at the moment that you think might have caused this sort of behavior and how long was/has she been on it?

Has she always had issues with inattentiveness? behavior? disorganization? impulsivity? being defiant?

14 is really late for someone to diagnose this sort of thing. Like,a lot ofkids are getting a bit better by that age.

she has had all of the test and she hasn't had a problem until they started adjusting her meds with her behavior... And i am not condoning her behavoir but i wouldn't stick my hand in a public garbage not knowing what kind of germs are in there and she doesn't usually cuss the teachers or even yell at them...

 

[GoinBackToCali]

Bo B Bunny wrote:

Um, it might be a good thing that your doctor is going to change. no medicine we've used has caused that sort of behavior. It doesn't sound like an ADHD problem as much as behavioral issues - cussing a teacher like that?

Has she been CLINICALLY DIAGNOSED?by a child psychologist? tested with something like the Stanford-Binet test?

Has she had bloodwork for ruling out thyroid, lead poisoning or other health issues?

There are WAY too many children diagnosed by one or two symptoms in a doctor's office or school and I wouldn't trust something other than the things I mention.

What medicine is she on at the moment that you think might have caused this sort of behavior and how long was/has she been on it?

Has she always had issues with inattentiveness? behavior? disorganization? impulsivity? being defiant?

14 is really late for someone to diagnose this sort of thing. Like,a lot ofkids are getting a bit better by that age.

The Bo has spoken...

I have the 14 year old who is getting better..this whole thread just disturbs me..it does in fact sound more like behavioral and less like an ADHD issue. I have poured thousands upon thousands of dollars into my son's care..and I like to think I am pretty well versed in his issues, and what are and are not symptomatic of his disorders, and that type of behavior is not. Sorry.. but it's not. The fact that VISD actually got an attorney to map out what was actually symptomatic of specific disorders was pretty helpful as well, if not severely damaging to their case.
I am not judging you.. I am just saying.. medicating her for a perceived problem will lead to a whole other can of worms..it probably will exacerbate her other minor issues.
It could very well be she could just be like I was at 14... a pain in the rear know it all who has to grow out of it.. fortunately I did..

I wish you luck..

BTW.. I assume your going to Beaumont for help... using Dr. Kanneganti or Dr. Kaza?, feel free to PM here if you need to..