Vent/advice

[Catlyn]

Recently i've been feeling a little conflicted.
My life has led me to move to yet another city away from Iris and the sleeping boys.
I got a job at the other city, and if all goes well in terms of my own life, i'll be starting a new semester in one of the art schools there, while continuing the job part-time.
I'll be able to stay at my sister's through the summer, so hopefully i'll be able to save up some money again. If i get accepted, i'll have to find a spot at the dorms because come fall, sis is moving herself.
I'm worried for my lady Iris back home. I can't help but feel that i'll be leaving her behind in pursuit of a better life. Even though i'm doing it for both of us, looking at the long-term, the thought won't leave me alone.
I can't take Iris to my sister's place as she has a cat with an abundance of hunting instincts who gets everywhere. It would be unreasonable to move her for only a few months anyway, as i wouldn't be able to have her in the dorm if i were to be accepted to school.
Now, i'm not so worried about the thought that Iris wouldn't survive with my parents. She's managed before, but i'm seriously doubting if she would actually thrive as she's been able to with me around.
The thing is, mum's attention to Iris is unpredictable. She might not even come by to say hi, but the next day she might as well live in her area with a big basket of forage for her. She might let her run free all day one time, and the next she might not open the door for Iris until dad comes home. She could be all over her and she could want nothing to do with her.
Through experience, i also know that neither mum nor dad will inspect Iris for ticks. Dad might remove them if he finds any, but mum will be petrified and refuse to do it herself. They most likely never look at her properly or inspect her enough to notice ticks.
It's also questionable if they would be able to notice minor health concerns early enough before they turn into big ones. (They even confuse if and when Iris needs gas drops or not.) Ahh, i'm hoping that never has to happen.
I won't be able to see her much any more. Having a full-time during summer and two part-times after that for two and half years doesn't leave me with much time to spend with her. She'd be a middle-aged-mistress by the time i could get her to live only with me. If she even lives that long, considering the bad luck with the boys, but let's hope that she lives to see a ripe old age.
I can't push my life and development away in favour of her, but i can't ignore her wellbeing for my own either.
It's an emotional dilemma and i don't have the knowledge on how to deal with the situation.

 

[BrownieDaisyandJasmine<3]

Dealing with a similar crisis. I want to have a better life for myself and my 2 buns, but Ive been working so much these days that I dont get to spend quality time with them anymore. By the time Im settled, who knows how long its going to take. And bunnies are so ******* unpredictable they'll be fine one day and gone the next, like my 3rd bunny who passed 3 months ago. Well, it was my fault; I felt she was getting better but she wasnt and I didnt act quickly enough. Im still fortunate to be able to live with the remaining 2 (parents house), but honestly Im quite unhappy here, and that affects my ability to enjoy the present moments with them.

So I guess all we can do is our best. If you are within driving distance from her, you could maybe go visit her sometimes. Or if your situation allows, you could get a small apartment for both of you.

 

[JBun]

If you feel like she'll be relatively ok with your parents for the summer, I would say give it those few months, and just keep checking in to make sure she's getting checked for ticks regularly, and any of your other concerns. Then after the summer you'll have a better idea what your plans will be.

If at that time, you won't have the time for her that you feel she needs, and she won't get enough interaction being with your parents, you can make the decision then, if it would be best for her quality of life to rehome her. Though if it comes to that, I would only recommend rehoming if you can find a really good home for her, where you know she'll be cared for properly. Better to stay with your parents, in a home you know she's comfortable in, and safe and cared for, then to end up somewhere else not being cared for properly.

 

[overhear]

I completely get it. We were in a similar situation a bunch of years ago when we moved abroad for my husband's job and couldn't bring our beloved bun. I put up signs (see attached poster) around town and got 2 responses -- one from a nice family but without rabbit experience, and another from a young couple who lived around the corner. The guy had had pet rabbits in the past and really missed having one. We had a long sit down and I could tell that he would love and care for my bunny just like I did, so he became my bunny's new person.

I'll be honest-10 years out I still feel teary about leaving my bunny behind. But I also know that those are my feelings -- not my bunny's feelings -- because he was very well loved in his new home.

This might be a good time for you to see if you can find a home where your bunny will be 100% loved and cared for so that you can both really thrive.