someone reassure me...

[andreabaylon]

So I am so glad to have this thread!!!! I have been living with horrible guilt for the past three weeks since having to put down my lionhead rabbit. I feel as though I murdered someone. Let me tell you my story...

I've never owned rabbits before and didn't know much about their care. We frequent a local pet store on a weekly basis to buy mice for our snakes and we always walk out of there with tears wishing we could adopt their latest new item. Well one day my honey came home with a beautiful grey haired lionhead we named Butch. We bought her all she needed-cage, pellets, hay, cage liner, a couple different types of chew toys. We set her up in our home and thought all was well. We didn't know how much rabbits ate on a daily basis, so we thought all was well. We did notice she didn't care for her chew toys so we tried buying several different types of chews and treats over the next couple of months. Because she had such long fluffy hair, we didn't notice her losing weight. On Valentine's Day my honey came home with Nibbler, a dwarf rabbit. I was brushing and trimming Butch when he came home and he set her on my lap. To my shock both animals weighed the same, yet Butch was more than three times her size. I finished up trimming her hair and for the first time I trimmed her face/mouth area. I noticed something between her teeth. Upon closer inspection, I saw she had a long thick piece of fur matted around her teeth and was digging into her gums. I managed to cut it out, and I looked into her mouth for the first time and her teeth just didn't look right; I didn't know what "right" looked like but I knew this wasn't it. So we took her back to the pet store and when they saw her teeth they were shocked; the guy said he'd never seen teeth that bad. They were over an inch long; she couldn't open her mouth to get food in, let alone close it to chew and swallow. They trimmed her teeth for me but said they could only cut them some, to cut more might put her in shock and she was in too weak a condition. They said to bring her back in a few weeks and they would trim more. So we took her home and it did seem like she was eating more, because I feel like I was filling her bowl more often. To supplement her, by boyfriend and I began feeding her this high calorie nutrient gel. Twice a day we'd wrap her up in a little burrito with a towel end he'd hold her against his chest and stroked her ears and talked to her while I fed her this goo with a medicine dropper. It felt like she was putting on weight but I just couldn't say for sure. One day I picked her up and felt that she had a big wad of moist poop matted into her butt so I trimmed it off but she still had poop so I decided to give her a little dunk in the sink. When her fur got wet and clung to her skin I saw just how thin she was. She was beyond emaciated. I broke down in tears and called for my boyfriend to please get ready to take us to the humane society. As I held her in the water waiting for him to come and see what had happened, the water started turning brownish. I emptied the sink and ran a fresh warm bowl. As soon as I set her bottom back down, the water once again turned brown then red. It was like she was bleeding from her anus. We dried her up as much as we could then wrapped her in a dry towel and drove to the pasadena humane society, about a ten minute drive. The whole way there I held her close to me, stroked her hair, whispered to her that everything was going to be ok. I am not a religious person at all yet I found myself praying for God's forgiveness for allowing this to happen to one of his creations. I explained everything to the nice people at the humane society. They placed her in a cage and took her back to see the doctor. They told me to call back to find out what happened to her. I phoned as soon as I got home, and the news is what we expected. She was too far gone to save, they had to put her down.

I feel so horrible, so awful, for allowing that poor animal to die like that. It is no one's fault but my own, and that is a burden that I must bear. This experience has inspired me though. I've decided to go back to school to be a vet technichian. I want to work with animals, and i want to know how to do it properly. I never want this to happen to me again.

 

[Jessyka]

:tears2: I can't even imagine how you must feel, I am so sorry. Rabbits are good at hiding illness and usually by the time people catch them, it's too late. You have learned from your mistake and that is all any one can ask of you. How is your other rabbit doing?

 

[andreabaylon]

well thankfully that one is a good story!!! Nibbler is doing just fine, I think. Her teeth are fine and boy does she eat, both pellets and fresh veggies. But still, I haven't found anything that she likes to gnaw on. So we keep trying new things and are keeping a close eye on her teeth for signs of overgrowing. Usually animals flock to me and thrive with me. I have a little mini-menagerie at home; 2 cats and 2 snakes plus the bunny...

 

[Flashy]

I'm so sorry about Butch. I can relate a lot to this and myself carry guilt from situations that arose with some of mine previously. I felt that had a been a better owner, I would have done things differently. And you know what? I would have. After losing Moon (a combination of my error/ignorance and vet error) I did make it a mission to learn more. I joined RO and I learnt. I mean, I REALLY, REALLY learnt so much here (you're definitely in the right place). I now know so much and my head is full of so much info. I will never, EVER do that to another bunny again.

In addition to that, I am now heavily involved in our local RSPCA with the rabbits, educating people, helping bunnies and pretty much doing anything.

If I could change it all and bring Moon back, I would, but I can't, so all I can do is remember, and to honour her memory by changing the lives of others. That's what it sounds like you are doing too. You loved Butch, but it sounds like your knowledge was not great (same as most people when they first bring home a rabbit to be honest) and you were very, very unlucky to have such an ill rabbit as your first rabbit. You clearly loved her so much and now it sounds like you are going to honour her memory by becoming a vet tech, which is absolutely awesome. I know it can't bring back Butch, but you will always be honouring her memory by helping so many others.

I'm not sure all that's come out right, but all I'm essentially trying to say is that as humans, we make mistakes and have things that hindsight may tell us we should have done differently. All we can do though is learn from those situations, and that's what you're doing. That's all you can do.

 

[jcottonl02]

Flashy is totally right.
I couldn't have put it better myself.

All you had was love in your heart for her, and your intentions were right and pure.

You are in the right place to learn, as we all have done and are still doing, and will still do! Nobody knows it all, and we can only try our best.

Jen

 

[mistyjr]

So sorry for your lost! :bunnyhug:

 

[sparney]

poor Butch!
good news about Nibbler though!
and my rabbit has a little log to keep his teeth down, he does use it but mroe often than not he decides to eat his hutch instead! lol
maybe rub carrot or anothe tasty treat with juice on the wood? so then he'd smell it, then taste it then start using it =/ just an idea! i dont know if it will work

 

[tonyshuman]

I am so sorry. I want to second what has already been said, that bunnies hide illnesses very well so that we often don't find out until it is too late, that the tooth issue was probably genetic and would have been a beast to treat if you had been able to see it in time, and that Butch's gift to you and to your future pets is that you sought out the proper information and shared it. In the long run, more bunnies' lives will be better because of that. Binky free, Butch.

 

[MILU]

Ouch, poor Butch!!! I hope she has a great place in heaven, where all good animals deserve to be, right next to God!!

I hope Nibbler is doing ok.. just in case, you mentioned you didn't know for sure how much Butch weighed - if you want to check your other bunny, you can always use a scale like those we use for ourselves to check our weight, so you'll know it more precisely if you ever need to control the weight again - it's not a bad idea...
Signs like drooling, not eating, not pooping (or pooping less, either in quantity or smaller sizes), or any abrupt changes might mean something is wrong with your bun-bun...

It's a good thing you're back to school to be a vet technician. I hope that means that you'll do some volunteer work to help other bunnies and animals! They need help.. the bad thing is that they can't talk.. like the animals used in the food industry. I've seen videos of how they live on youtube and I want to be vegan. I haven't eaten meat for quite some time, almost a year - that's what I'm doing for my bunnies who passed, and the goal is also not eating *any* animal produce at all, as they all make animals suffer horrible things their whole lives.. I need some help to quit eating cheese.. all the rest is sort of under control and I don't even want them anymore. I hope more people feel like doing the same to help the animals!

ray: Praying for Butch!! She's in heaven playing with my bunnies and God... I pray that she's happy!
:rip:ink iris:urplepansy::rainbow::clover::rose::cry2:in tears::bunnyangel: