Wabbitdad12
Retired Moderator
- Joined
- Aug 19, 2007
- Messages
- 8,668
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You are in the middle of some kind of project around the house
mowing the lawn, putting a new fence in, painting the living room,
or whatever.
You are hot and sweaty, covered in dirt or paint. You have your
old work clothes on. You know the outfit - shorts with the hole
in crotch, old T-shirt with a stain from who k nows what, and an
old pair of tennis shoes.
Right in the middle of this great home improvement project you
realize you need to run to Wal-Mart to get something to help
& nbsp; complete the job.
Depending on your age you might do the following:
In your 20's:
Stop what you are doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your
hair, brush your teeth, floss, and put on clean clothes. Check
yourself in the
mirror and flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because you
never know, you
; just might meet some hot chick while standing in the checkout
lane. You went to school with the pretty girl running the register.
In your 30's:
Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt. Change
shoes. You married the hot chick so no need for much else. Wash
your hands andcomb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add
a shot of your favorite cologne to cover the smell. The cute girl
running theregister is the kid sister to someone you went to school with.
In your 40's:
Stop what you are doing. Put a sweatshirt that is long enough to
cover the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on different
shoes and a hat.
Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so
you don't want to waste any of it on a trip to Wal-Mart. Check
yourself in the mirror and do more sucking in than flexing. The
spicy young thing running the register is your daughter's age and
you feel weird thinking she isspicy.
In your 50's:
Stop what you are doing. Put a hat on, wipe the dirt off your
hands onto your shirt. Change shoes because you don't want to get
dirt in your new sports car. Check yourself in the mirror and you
swear not to wear that shirt anymore because it makes you look
fat. The cutie running the register smiles when she sees you
coming and you think you still have it. Then you remember the hat
you have on is from Buddy's Bait & Beer Bar and it says, 'I Got
Worms.'
In your 60's:
Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat anymore. Hose the
dog poop off your shoes. The mirror was shattered when you
were in your 50's. You hope you have underwear on so nothing
hangs out t he hole in you pants. The girlrunning the register may be cute, but you don't have yourglasses on so you are not sure.
In your 70's:
Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Wal-Mart until they
have your prescriptions ready, too. Don't even notice the dog
poop on your shoes.
The young thing at the register smiles at you because you
remind her of her grandfather.
In your 80's:
Stop what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again. Now
you remember you needed to go to Wal-Mart. Go to Wal-Mart and
wander around trying to think what it is you are looking for.
Fart out loud and you think someone called out your name. You
went to school with the old lady who greeted you at the front
door.
mowing the lawn, putting a new fence in, painting the living room,
or whatever.
You are hot and sweaty, covered in dirt or paint. You have your
old work clothes on. You know the outfit - shorts with the hole
in crotch, old T-shirt with a stain from who k nows what, and an
old pair of tennis shoes.
Right in the middle of this great home improvement project you
realize you need to run to Wal-Mart to get something to help
& nbsp; complete the job.
Depending on your age you might do the following:
In your 20's:
Stop what you are doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your
hair, brush your teeth, floss, and put on clean clothes. Check
yourself in the
mirror and flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because you
never know, you
; just might meet some hot chick while standing in the checkout
lane. You went to school with the pretty girl running the register.
In your 30's:
Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt. Change
shoes. You married the hot chick so no need for much else. Wash
your hands andcomb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add
a shot of your favorite cologne to cover the smell. The cute girl
running theregister is the kid sister to someone you went to school with.
In your 40's:
Stop what you are doing. Put a sweatshirt that is long enough to
cover the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on different
shoes and a hat.
Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so
you don't want to waste any of it on a trip to Wal-Mart. Check
yourself in the mirror and do more sucking in than flexing. The
spicy young thing running the register is your daughter's age and
you feel weird thinking she isspicy.
In your 50's:
Stop what you are doing. Put a hat on, wipe the dirt off your
hands onto your shirt. Change shoes because you don't want to get
dirt in your new sports car. Check yourself in the mirror and you
swear not to wear that shirt anymore because it makes you look
fat. The cutie running the register smiles when she sees you
coming and you think you still have it. Then you remember the hat
you have on is from Buddy's Bait & Beer Bar and it says, 'I Got
Worms.'
In your 60's:
Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat anymore. Hose the
dog poop off your shoes. The mirror was shattered when you
were in your 50's. You hope you have underwear on so nothing
hangs out t he hole in you pants. The girlrunning the register may be cute, but you don't have yourglasses on so you are not sure.
In your 70's:
Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Wal-Mart until they
have your prescriptions ready, too. Don't even notice the dog
poop on your shoes.
The young thing at the register smiles at you because you
remind her of her grandfather.
In your 80's:
Stop what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again. Now
you remember you needed to go to Wal-Mart. Go to Wal-Mart and
wander around trying to think what it is you are looking for.
Fart out loud and you think someone called out your name. You
went to school with the old lady who greeted you at the front
door.