So annoyed

[audrinasmommy88]

Ok, so we have decided to name our son William Elijah and call him Liam for short. My mother in law flat out told me that she would not be calling him Liam, she would be calling him Eli. I have told her that is not his name. She just laughs it off. I said something the other day about Liam and her words were "His name is not Liam it's Eli". I am to the point that I just want to slap her. I dont understand why she thinks that she can pick my sons name. She isn't birthing him so who does she think she is?? How do I address this situation?? Ive reached my boiling point and I'm going to explode!

 

[Nancy McClelland]

She's a ******* just like my mother-in-law. Don't get all up in a bind as it sounds like she's doing it to get to you. You could also give her a good jerk by telling her we decided his middle name will be Robert instead of Elijah--put the shoe right back on her foot or just ignore the braying fluffybunnybottom. I used the last three letters of the third word in this paragraph, but this program can't differentiate a proper term from profanity which has no place in this forum. Wonder if I can call a female dog a badword. Won't let me do that either--third edit by the way.

 

[Anaira]

Good idea about pretending to change his middle name! Why not ask what her problem with Liam is? Or if she can at least call him William instead...Just tell her flat out, it isn't appropriate for her to interfere with what you two choose to call your son. If she persists, disinvite her from the shower.

Or at least tell her that she can have her own pet name for him if he wishes, but that she cannot tamper with his real name, or nickname; i.e., no buying or making things with 'Eli' on them, or telling people that's her grandson's name.

 

[audrinasmommy88]

I just don't understand why she wants to mess with a pregnant woman. It takes me like 1 second to go crazy on someone right now. I have no filter for my mouth anymore since becoming pregnant. Things just come out of my mouth. Larry, I have a few choice words to say to her, but I also can't put them here lol. I think it's funny that ******* is allowed but not "female dog". Hmmm...weird haha

 

[CosmosMomma]

You sound like me and I'm not even pregnant

But honestly this situation is similar to what my mom went through when she was pregnant with me. My name is Megan Noelle, and I go by Megz or Elle/Ellie with really close family and friends. Well, when my mom announced my name and the spelling, my uncle went on about how it was spelled wrong and that it would be pronounced "me-gan" and not "meg-an" or "may-gan" because "meg-an" is spelled meghan and "may-gan" is spelled Magen. Lawd, momma was PISSED lol, but eventually she said "It's my child I'll call her what I wish, don't like it? too bad". Totally what you should say to the monster in law

"You're not pushing him out, I am. You didn't carry him for 9 months, I did. ELI is not his name, nor his nickname, it is LIAM, and If you can't accept that then you can be on your merry way because he is my child not yours" Don't be afraid to be cranky or rude.

 

[audrinasmommy88]

I guess the reason I dont want to confront the situation is because I dont speak, nor intend to speak to my father or mother. So I have no family. And i hate people being mad at me. But its to the point that I cant take it anymore. I really need to address this before I get so mad that I say things I shouldnt/dont want to. So the next time she says it to me, that will be when I take care of this. I guess the reason she thinks its okay is because she called my husband "Miah" because his middle name is Jeremiah. And that is something only she calls him. But that is her child. She can call him what she wants. Liam is not hers. Hes mine, and I get the say so of who calls him what.

 

[whitelop]

My mom really wanted me to name my son Harrison. I don't like the name Harrison (no offense to anyone named Harrison)
I named him Anderson Jacob and we call him AJ. But she was dead set on Harrison, and told me she was still going to call him Harrison when he was born. It pissed me off. I told her that if she called him Harrison I would freak out because thats not his name, thats no where near what his name is! She never did call him that, because he looks like an Anderson/AJ. But sometimes they can be really pains in the butt! I think you just need to put your foot down, tell her if she can't call him by his given name and/or nickname you have picked out then she can't call him any name. She can refer to him as small boy!
By the way, I LOVE the name you've picked out! Its very strong and great!

 

[audrinasmommy88]

Thanks Morgan I am just waiting for the next "Eli" to come out of her mouth and then I will address it. I'm putting my foot down. Better to get it done now than later before she gets to used to calling him that

 

[Blue eyes]

And where is hubby in all this? He should be the one telling his mother to leave you alone and that you two have decided the name together. It is not her choice.

 

[audrinasmommy88]

He wants to confront her in person, and he has been working every weekend (which is when we normally go over there) so he hasnt had a chance to say anything to her. Otherwise, this wouldve ended when it started. I have kept him up to date with what is going on so when he can talk to her he knows everything, but I dont know how much more i can take before i explode

 

[I_heart_Fraggles]

Wow....You and I are in the same boat when it comes to mother in laws...I love my in laws and like you I do not have any other family as a disowned my mother 3 years ago and I do not know my father. So my in laws are it.....and I do love them.
But my MIL thinks its the funniest game to drive me up a tree sometime to the point where my husband has had to correct her more then once and we have gone a week or more without speaking (my MIL and I)...But we always get over it and you need to just put her in her place also. She will get over it, she sounds a lot like Jason's mom. Jason's mom also said she would be in charge of all baby names with "HER GRANDCHILD'.....We fixed that real quick....No grandchildren for you miss attitude! :nasty:

 

[gmas rabbit]

You should tell her if she really doesn't like his name, she may call him honey, sweetie or darling. If she insisted on calling him Eli, ask her to leave, hang up on her and return anything addressed to the wrong name. She will eventually get the idea. As for putting your foot down, I suggest put it up -- but that is not allowed on here either.

 

[irishbunny]

That would drive me up the wall, I was bad enough when my sister did that to me with a cat we had as children! I can only imagine how annoyed I'd be if it were my child.

 

[LakeCondo]

audrinasmommy88 wrote:

He wants to confront her in person, and he has been working every weekend (which is when we normally go over there) so he hasnt had a chance to say anything to her. Otherwise, this wouldve ended when it started. I have kept him up to date with what is going on so when he can talk to her he knows everything, but I dont know how much more i can take before i explode

If he can't do it in person SOON, he really should raise the issue by phone or text message, smoke-signals or whatever. If his name is William, she could call him that. Of course if you actually named him Liam ... I guess she could call him Lee.

One of my older cousins was named Winifred Evelyn & one parent called her Winifred & the other called her Evelyn. I don't know if this started before their divorce or not. There was never any disagreement about the other 2 kids' names.

And in grade school there was a boy whose name was Thomas Michael but we always called him Mike, perhaps because there was another Tom but no Mike. Anyway a couple times his mother was looking for him after school & we didn't know who she meant when she asked about Tom.

In thinking about it, I think it's a good idea to call & name a child the same thing. If that's the m-i-l's point, she's making it the wrong way.

 

[audrinasmommy88]

Katie, I havent spoke to my mother in 3 years either....my dad in almost 6...my mom decided to drive her car through our front yard and throw stuff and glass at our front porch because I wouldnt allow her to see my daughter...who would when she acts like that...my dad is a whole other story, very abusive to me. So definitely not people i want to be around or let my children around. But my MIL is alot like yours too...she will eventually get over it. We have had issues before, nothing like this, and she cant go more than a day without talking to me...especially because of Audrina. When me and the hubby were planning our wedding, we were trying to pick out what color tableclothes we wanted. They didnt have the exact color in our wedding so we were going to have to get it a shade lighter or a shade darker. Being that our reception was going to be dimly lit, we knew that the lighter color would be better because it would look darker in the reception. Well the MIL put her 2 cents in and wanted us to go with the darker color. If we had done that, the tableclothes wouldve looked almost black at the reception. This woman actually CRIED when we ordered the lighter color just because it wasnt what she had picked. She wouldnt speak to us until the next night!

Alma, I would love to put my foot up her ... But I dont like being dirty hahahaha

 

[audrinasmommy88]

Orlena, thats how I feel about it. Besides, its going to really confuse my 3 year old when one person is calling her brother Liam and the other is calling him Eli. We just finally got her calling him by his name. The less confusion the better.

 

[Blue eyes]

I know this may not be the norm, but we never told anyone what names we chose for our kids while I was still pregnant. I figured they could find out after baby is born. That way, I figured, their only response can be "that's nice," and they can't try to influence us to change it 'cause it's a done deal. :wink

 

[audrinasmommy88]

Im thinking thats what Im going to do if we have another baby. I havent had any problems except with her. But she always has to be complicated and manipulative to get what she wants...well let me tell you, she has another thing coming

 

[LakeCondo]

She obviously has control issues. Is your husband an only child? My sister & I used to wish we had a 'bad' brother, so we'd get less attention. Of course as adults we're glad we don;t have to deal with this imaginary him.

Why don't you name him Liam if you're going to call him that? Your m-i-l might be happy she helped solidify the name choice & avoid confusion in what to call him. [Maybe she doesn't like Liam Neeson.]

 

[bethepoet]

Personally, I don't think you should be the one to confront her. I *totally* understand your frustration. I'm highly strung as it is, and I can imagine I'm going to resemble a bear with a sore head when I am pregnant. So if it was me, I wouldn't be able to have a calm discussion with her. It would start out that way, but it wouldn't stay that way. If you think you might just fly off the handle, ask your husband to deal with it. He'll be stressed too, but not as much as you, so he can approach it in a calmer way. Plus he knows her better.

By the way, I absolutely LOVE the name Audrina