I met my ex-fiance online. We met up, got engaged, he moved in with me etc etc. Unfortunately, he was not someone I could trust (not cheatin, but other lies) and his going and coming was always very very difficult to deal with. Anyway, we did it for 5 years. I broke off the engagement for too many reasons to list.
However, I met Jeff (my current boyfriend) online as well. To be honest, I was quite annoyed with myself. I really really did NOT want to do the same thing again. Well... Being me, I was extremely straight forward about it and told him if we did this is was to try for something long term. Anything less would simply be a waste of time. I also told him I didn't want to have a boyfriend without having one. Meaning, I didn't want to go to family gatherings etc. without ever being accompanied. I didn't want to have a crappy day and not be able to have a hug...
He was good. He was determined. He spent a ton of money. You know, finances play a huge part in these types of relationships I think. If you can't afford to get to each other to be together, it becomes a major problem. Luckily it worked out great with Jeff and we decided it simply was too hard and too expensive so he asked me to move in with him since we both felt ready. I'm here now and I could not be happier.
Thing is, if you think long-term, there are lots of things to consider. Moving to another country isn't just a small thing. As much as you can love a person, sometimes outside factors can be pretty important as well. I know with my ex-fiance, I hated the country I was supposed to move to. I was terrified of moving there and even though I loved him, I was not looking forward to leaving Canada. Holland on the other hand is very much like Canada in many ways so that was much smoother.
They can work. To be honest though, I do not believe in 'love conquers all' so lots of things need to be taken into cosideration. Finances play a major part. It's quite hard to deal with not actually feeling, seeing, and hearing your partner in person. There are nice ways to somewhat compensate but it's never the same. Having had experienced it for quite some years, I can say it gets tiring. Love will make you want to persevere but if you cannot advance, it gets too draining.
It all depends on how much you want and can put in. In the end though, I am very grateful I gave Jeff a shot. But then again, he came to me, I went to him... So we weren't apart for too too long. (Though anyone who has experience can tell you that once you meet and fall in love with someone, time apart, no matter how small, seems quite enormous!) It was a year in July since we met in person but we are already living together. That's how badly the distance was taking a toll on us
Best of luck if you choose to embark fully!
