leaving

[dreamgal042]

im gonna clarify something that i prolly shouldadone a better job explaining. the main problem isnt that my dad'sdating. that i could care less. the main problem is that my dad isclueless as to how to raise a daughter. keep in mind im still 15...ibuy most of the groceries, i buy a lot of my clothes...the only timehe'll buy something for me is when its christmastime, or my birthday.he'll leave me ALONE all my byself for 24+ hours when he decides totake his girlfriend on a trip to north carolina. he tells me he'll callme in 3 hours when he got there...11 hours later, he'll call saying hecouldnt findservice...im sorry, i didnt know ittook8 hours to find cell phone service, unless you dont careenough togo out and find it.he'll go out till 2amon a saturday night, and not pick up his cell phone when i try to findout where he is. he'll bring her home when he *knows* im home, just cuzhe wants us to meet, and be best friends. HE FORCED ME TO MEET HER!!! itold him that whenever he brought her home or talked about her, istarted to cry, and all he said to me is 'i dont know what you want meto do'. its not the fact that she's replacing my mom. its the fact thatshe's replacing me. sure, im 15 and dont wanna hang out with my dad.but neither do i want him to never be around. its bad enough that im 15with a 63 year old dad (almost...), but to have one who is still in themindset that his daughter would prefer him to be out earning money thanat home with her? to have one who tries to force a women he *knows* hisdaughter hates onto her so they'll be friends? is it any wonder i hateher? okay...i dont actually hate her....i think i just hate what he'sdoing to me with regard to her. do you know how much fun it is stayingup till 2am when you have to be up early the next morning, just to makesure your dad comes home? its amazing how many times he's "made me" goto bed in tears, and i feel like theres nothing i can do.

 

[Bo B Bunny]

Have you talked to your dad about thisstuff? A lot of men don't know how to raise theirchildren. The women have been there and take care ofthings. Not all men are like that, but a lot. Ithink it's gotten better with my generation and the next, but beforethat..........

My hubby wouldn't have a clue on some things. Your dad couldalso be in denial or avoiding the situation in fear. I reallythink you need to discuss this with him, your doc, and maybe a femalemember of the family?

Last year, a female in the family was gone a lot and her one daughterwas always home. She's close to your age. So, allthe time it was her and her dad. Lots of family around, butsome things happened to her (kinda personal things) and she had NO ONEaround. She's 13 and all alone cause Dad is working.........

Thank God I was around and found out. If I hadn't, she'd have dealt with it alone.

I know it has to be hard, so if someone isn't reaching out, it'simportant for you to reach. I think from what you are saying,it's obvious you have insight on the issues.... now it's just a matterof finding a solution. You do need someone. You areold enough to stay alone, etc., but I think overnight and late nightsall the time are way wrong. He needs to be around and be yourfather. I totally agree on that!

I feel so bad for you, it must be really difficult. I wish I could help and give you big hugs!

 

[Buck Jones]

I'm not able to help you with your poblems, but I'm glad you're back!

Buck

 

[ariel]

Dreamgal I can relate to you, it was other wayround though, my mum did a similar thing when I was 16. It's a rathermessy story but I am always here if you need to talk to . I too was athighschool and keeping the house going whilst my mum "disspaered"literally for days at a a time, it worried me made me feel unloved andvery very angry at her new boyfriend. It has taken nearly 14 yrs to getused to her being with some one else, but we get along ok now. I'llpost my email address and if you like i can share a few things with you If you don't know where to start with the email, just send me onetaht says hi and i'll start if you like . There's no pressure to do itI just want you to know the offer is there.

First and foremost remember this, you ARE a wonderful person, whoobviously cares about your dad and also about your relationship withyour dad, you WILL get through this, you WILL make it to happier daysin your life.

(((((((((HUGE HUGS))))))))))))) for you

Chin up

[email protected]