I got suspended from school today.

[Samantha]

I'm suspended. Me. In trouble. Me?! Yes, me.

I can't go back to school until Thursday. Two days out of school in an out-of-school suspension. All because I skipped math class and instead sat in the girl's bathroom and cried my eyes out. I wasn't trying to get in trouble and it's not my fault my math teacher saw me earlier in the cafeteria which meant I was in school and had no reason to miss her class. I've never been in trouble before and now the whole entire world is disappointed in me. Andno one knows why.

This sucks big time. I'm a total failure.

 

[pamnock]

I'm sorry you had a bad day. Life is big, tomorrow is a new adventure.

I hope it's a little better for you. ink iris:



Pam

 

[trailsend]

The whole entire world is not disappointed in you, Samantha, and you are not a failure. So you skipped math class and got a two day suspension, it's not a good thing, no, but it's not the end of the world. I know it feels like it. When you are young, everything feels like, trust me, I know. But I've learned that it's not usually as bad as it seems, and tomorrow you'll get another chance. So honey, it will be O.K.

I'm sorry to hear you missed class because you were crying in the bathroom sweetie

 

[Samantha]

I really hope tomorrow is better. Today was terrible! But I don't ever want to go back to school. I might as well stay suspended forever!

I don't want to be "Samanorexic" anymore. It's not fair. They were my friends. Key word: were! I never want to see them again. I never want to see anyone again!

 

[trailsend]

I'm sorry, people suck sometimes I can't tell you how to deal with it, since I've been out of my teens I've been living so far back in the forest I rarely see anyone lol. People can be mean, especially girls. I'm going to tell you to not take what they say to heart and know that you are beautiful, intellegent, and much wiser than they are. But I know it's easier said than done. But usually when people say means things about someone else it is because they are jealous of the other person.

 

[pamnock]

Public school is so hard for teen girls - I so wish there were a better way. You shouldn't have to go through this.

My daughter was so miserable at the new school when we moved that I ended up pulling her out and homeschooling her through high school.

She's a happy college student now, and glad to be away from those nasty girls.

I know that it's not any consolation to you when you are going through such hurt, but the girls attack because they are miserable and unhappy and want to make someone hurt as much as they do. I've been through this with my daughter, and it was horrible. She's actually friends with some of the girls that used to torment her.

I guess you never know where your life will go.

Pam

 

[Samantha]

Since holiday break I've been throwing my lunch out at school and skipping or just having some water or diet pop. Well 2 weeks ago, my best friend...EX best friend....told me that she was going to tell the school counselor about what I've been doing at lunch time. I begged her not to and then told her that if she did it that I'd never talk to her again. And she got all upset and called me "Samanorexic" and told all our other friends to call me that too. And since today was the first day back since winter break, I thought it had all blown over. But everyone was calling me "Samanorexic." It's not fair. I'm not anorexic. My "sister" is in treatment for an eating disorder and I might be a little thin, but not anorexic. I need to lose weight, not gain. They just don't know anything. It's not fair and they're ruining my life!

I don't want to be suspended, but I don't want to be in school either. I'm 14. I'm a freshman in high school and I wish I were back in middle school because high school sucks. I can't tell my mom. I can't tell my dad. I can't do anything. I'm not sorry for skipping. It's not my fault. They made me cry. Why aren't they in trouble?! I hate everything right now! I'm a failure and....UGH!

 

[XxMontanaxX]

Look at it this way, you get a little vacation. Try and look at the bright side. Teachers never understand, they expect you to do everything they want, and no excuses for anything less.

And as for those friends you had, ignore them. I'm glad they said that so you could see what kind of people they really are. :XI'm so sorry though.

 

[pamnock]

I'm glad that you could tell us. Sometimes we just need to get it out and have someone recognize how we feel and to acknowledge how much pain we're in.

We're listening to you Sam, even if we can't fix what's going on.

Pam

 

[Samantha]

I'm a mess right now and all I can say is thanks for listening and being here. My mom is just so upset with me. She is disappointed in me and that makes me sad. And she hasn't even told my dad and stepmom yet. I don't know what to do. He's going to be so mad. I hate this.

I swear I'm not a bad kid. I've never been in trouble before. I don't know what to do!

But thanks, really...thanks.

 

[pla725]

Have you spoken to your parents or another trusted adult about this? I think you need to speak to someone at school about what happened or another trusted adult.

I think your friend initially was concerned about you and wanted to help. But then the "mean girl" syndrome kicked in and she taunted you. I know from personal experience high school kids can be cruel. They target those who those who they think are inferior to them. All the while they are probably just as insecure as everyone else. I know it hurts now but be the bigger person and learn from this.

I am concerned about you. I think you really do need to speak someone.

 

[BlueCamasRabbitry]

Oh wow-your school sounds harsh for suspending you for two days just because you skipped class. I mean, I never do that, but when kids do, they just get a warning and In-school-suspension, Or ISS. They just get that for a day or two.

Sorry though! :hug:

Emily

 

[Orchid]

pamnock wrote:

I'm sorry you had a bad day. Life is big, tomorrow is a new adventure.

I hope it's a little better for you. ink iris:



Pam

I like that Pam...it is a great way to look at things.


I am sorry you got in trouble today...but it does not make you a failure in the least. I tell my 6 year even now...we all have bad days and I don't mind that I just always expect the truth. Lying is personally the only thing I will not stand for....

Try to not be so hard on yourself hun...we are all intitled to a bad day..more than one actually...

 

[Samantha]

I haven't talked to anyone about it. I mean, you guys, but not my mom, dad, or stepmom. And I didn't talk to anyone at the school either. They asked me what was going on while we were waiting for my mom to get there to pick me up, but I wouldn't tell them. I'm too embarrassed and ashamed.

What can I really say about it? I was too busy crying in the girl's bathroom because my best friend started the "Samanorexic" rumor? I know she had good intentions and was worried, but did that make it okay for her to tell all my friends that I skip lunch and throw away the lunch my mom makes me and I bring to school with me? That doesn't make me anorexic. I'm not skinny enough. I'm kind of, you know, fat. It's just not fair.

Now I'm suspended and in trouble with my mom. And she finally told my dad and he's so disappointed in me. He was even telling my mom that maybe I need to live with him...absolutely not! I know that's not going to happen, but it just makes me so upset that he even suggested it. Now my mom and dad don't trust me. My mom keeps coming in my room to see what I'm doing. I hate this so much. I really, really do!

Thanks for all the support, but I don't deserve it. I suck. School sucks. This whole thing sucks.

 

[trailsend]

Samantha, you really should talk to someone. I know it's hard to do, but it will help in the long run. That wasn't a nice thing for those girls to do, but you really must not worry about them, although I know it was hurtful and you thought they were your friends. I think the one girl was honestly concerned about you which is good, but it wasn't fair of her to tell the other girls to say things like that to you.

Hon, you said you are thin, but could stand to loose some weight. I saw your pictures in the photos of me thread, and you are a very lovely young lady, and by no means overweight, not even close! The key is not in not eating, it's in eating healthy, balanced meals.

Regardless, you should try to find someone to talk to, be it your mom, a school counselor. I know from my youth, I would have been so much better off if I had just talked to someone...it helps to talk about your feelings and talk through things with people.

You absolutely deserve our support.

 

[PepnFluff]

I know you dont want to i didnt want to when i was depressed recently but talk to someone i talked to my best friend and she helped alot so if im feeling depressed i text her (she lives far way) she helps me ALOT. Even if you dont want to talk to anyone you know. Do you have like a help line? where you can just let it all out over the phone and they suggest things to do and give you numbers if you want them. It sounds like a stupid thing your friend did but as many others have said i think she was just a bit concerned and took it to far. think of the good things you get to stay home all day and watch Oprah lolI love Oprah lol and play with your bunnies all day:biggrin2:

 

[Samantha]

Well, I guess since everyone was so supportive I should really update this thread.

I finally talked to my mom a little bit this afternoon. I had been talking to someone in the chat and she helped me to see that I needed to come clean about some things. So I told my mom that my friends had been teasing me and that I spent my math class crying in the bathroom. She called my guidance counselor right after talking to me and then told her what I had said. My guidance counselor then called my mom back after talking to the assistant principal. And, guess what?! I'm allowed to go back to school tomorrow (weather permitting - we have a major snow storm happening right now) and the suspension will be taken off my permanent record!

I'm kind of excited and happy, but still kind of upset about everything. And I'm majorly confused! The same person I talked to in chat things that I should've told my mom about the whole "Samanorexic" thing. I kind of, maybe, skipped that part when telling my mom about what happened yesterday. I don't think it's such a big deal because all girls skip lunch sometimes. And it's just a "diet." But I guess maybe it's not the healthiest thing either. I don't know. I'm just afraid my mom and dad and stepmom will be even more disappointed in me. And I'm scared they'll blame Alexah because she had these issues while living in our house (there's more to that one too). I kind of just don't have a clue as to what I should do.

Anyways, I guess it's good to have my record cleared and to be able to go back to school tomorrow. I need to go for a bit and read for a book report that's due next Monday. My mom wants me to finish my book by today (I only have like 50 pages left) since I wasn't in school. Then she'll probably want me to start the project, but, blah! I don't feel like it!

Thanks again for all the support. I totally appreciate all the help both in this thread and in chat!

 

[NZminilops]

I am so sorry you've had such an awefull time .

I am a bit worried about you skipping lunch, that's not good for you at all. How about a healthy eating and exercise system, if you are worried about your body? At your age, you are growing and your body definetly needs the nutrition. I'm betting you're perfect the way you are anyway. I thought I was fat at 14, and now wish so bad I was that size now, I was actually perfect weight for my height :?.

You said "I might be a little thin, but not anorexic. I need to lose weight, not gain"... if you are a little thin, what makes you think you need to lose weight ?

Skipping lunch isn't a diet. Been there, done that. Just makes you hungrier later and you end up getting a sugar low and stuffing your face with sweets anyway . It's confusing for your body. It's so much better to instead exchange 'bad' foods for fruits and vegetables, if you want to be healthy.


As for your friend making fun of you, that totally sucks! it sounds to me that she really was worried about you though. If she was worried she cares about you, and is concerned. She doesn't want to see her friend get an eating disorder if it can be avoided. I don't want to see anything like that happen to you either. You remind me a lot of me when I was your age (I'm 25 now).

Sorry to ramble on and on, I suffer from an eating disorder myself, so this touched a nerve with me. I really do know how it feels, the pressures and the hurt when you are made fun of. It makes school feel like it's not worth it. I was expelled from school for no attendance, you don't want that to happen to you, trust me. It's made my life twice as hard as it needed to be.

I'm so glad you talked to your mom, that's awesome .

Michelle

 

[tundrakatiebean]

Samantha wrote:

I don't think it's such a big deal because all girls skip lunch sometimes. And it's just a "diet." But I guess maybe it's not the healthiest thing either. I don't know. I'm just afraid my mom and dad and stepmom will be even more disappointed in me. And I'm scared they'll blame Alexah because she had these issues while living in our house (there's more to that one too). I kind of just don't have a clue as to what I should do.

I've been reading this but haven't said anything yet, so here goes.



I have honestly never skipped lunch, I may be about 5 pounds over weight currently, but I'm able to maintain a healthy weight by balancing what I eat and somewhat portion control. Skipping meals is not healthy and in the long run will make you weigh more, because your body will start storing fat to use as back-up energy if you skip another meal. If you eat 3 healthy meals a day your body is going to be happy and not want to store fat. If you do have anorexia this probably won't make much difference to you because it is mostly a mental to body inconsistancy. You should talk to your mother or someone else you trust about this, if they are mad at you or Alexah they are being unfair and unkind. I really, really think you should talk to someone now.

 

[Samantha]

I've been thinking a lot over the last hour or so. Actually, way more thinking than reading, but that's okay. I appreciate all the help y'all have offered and I'm trying to accept that help graciously instead of getting upset or frustrated because of the situation.

I called my ex best friend and she's going to be coming over in a few minutes. She lives down the street so it won't take her too long to get here even though it's snowing like crazy outside. I'm going to talk to her about everything that's happened and then I'm going to ask her about what she thinks. Like, does she think something more than just a "diet" is going on? And other stuff like that. I know it's not the same as speaking to an adult, but she knows me really well and I'd like to talk to her before I go running to my mom.

I don't know what all else to say right now, but I'm thinking about what y'all are sharing with me and I'm going to do what's best for me despite being scared of the consequences. And I am scared! I don't know if I'll tell my mom tonight, or what, but I'm going to see what comes of my talk with my bestie and then I'll see where to go from there. How does that sound? It's a start...right?