TinysMom
Well-Known Member
I thought I would start a blog for New Hope. I know....I know...I have so many blogs already - I have Zeus' blog and the Lionhead blog and the Lionhead babies' blog. But I thought it might be interesting to do a blog about life with a disabled bunny....sharing bits and pieces of some days and things I want to remember. I wish I'd done this with GingerSpice when she was ill....but while I can't have a do over and go back to then - I CAN do a blog now for New Hope.
For those who don't know - New Hope is a special buck who has fought wry neck (more than once), stasis (more than once) and I suspect may be a victim of e cunniculi - which I think Randy would call a "wasting disease". He can sit up on his own - for limited periods of time but then either falls over or starts rolling. He needs us to be there to feed him (to keep him from rolling in the food) and sometimes I have to syringe feed him and sometimes he can sit and eat from a bowl. It depends upon how he's feeling at that particular feeding at that particular day.
I'm starting this blog today beacuse I've seen a change in New Hope and I'm not sure how to take the change - if it is good - or bad. I'm trying to think about it and prepare myself to accept it if it is for the worst.
You see - for the last few months - New Hope has been content to eat, sleep, poop and pee. Sometimes he'd be living with another sick buck and he loved to hump the other buck...and get groomed by the other buck and vice versa. That was before his last bad wry neck episiode.
Today he was fussing and fussing with his towel (which he hates) and I told him, "Go ahead and pee on the towel...I'll get you a new one..". One of the things I've learned is if he starts getting antsy and messing with his towel - he has to pee.
Well no - he was very upset. He kept looking at me and started to pull on my nightgown when I laid down next to him....so I went to pick him up and he quite literally peed all over me. I held him and laughed and laughed (I was about to wash the nightgown anyway)....and teased him about not being willing to pee on his towel - but being willing to pee on me. I reminded him that I'm the one who gives him water and pedialyte and all that good stuff....and that he should treat me nice.
Meanwhile - he snuggled into my nightgown for pets and attention and when I put him on the towel so I could get changed - he threw a fit. He kept chewing on his towel and tugging on it and trying to throw it at me or get it out from under him.
And you see - this is what is different about New Hope and has me concerned...the very fact that he is getting angry and upset.
When I think of someone being in the hospital - when they're at their worst....they're like he has been - not caring. But when they start to heal - they often get grumpy and complaining a lot.
But he's going beyond that and when he gets frustrated -its like he gives up. I'm afraid he's gonna decide that he's just not going to have a normal life and give up.
Its like - sometimes when he looks at me and I talk to him - I can see in his eyes that it is hitting him that he is going to be permamently disabled....that even though he's fought this before and done well....that this time its different. That his body is paying a price for all the times he's rolled and his little heart has pumped so fast and scared us so much. I'm afraid he's just going to give up on me....instead of learning he can have a different type of life and be content.
I have been trying to put him on the floor and let him get some exercise...and he does enjoy that some - till he gets frustrated and start rolling. Then he gets mad and finally just lays there and pouts.
I think I'm also really concerned today because he is barely touching his food - specifically his cheerios. He'll eat his baby food/pumpkin and he is drinking water. But he normally eats a LOT of cheerios at each feeding. (Breeders often use cheerios to help a rabbit that needs to keep weight on). Let me put it this way - he eats enough that I buy him his own bag of cheerios and keep it near him almost all the time so I can offer him some whenever I walk by or am sitting there reading a book.
And today he's barely touching them. I'm wondering if it is because this is a new bag and it is a different brand (I just now realized that) or what it is.
But he needs to eat....and if he gives up ... then he won't eat. And I'm scared that is what he's gonna do.
So my goal for right now - is to keep him eating...to keep him wanting to fight to live and get better...
And so this blog will be a way of recording memories I don't want to forget...for when he does pass and I need the comfort of this blog.
For those who don't know - New Hope is a special buck who has fought wry neck (more than once), stasis (more than once) and I suspect may be a victim of e cunniculi - which I think Randy would call a "wasting disease". He can sit up on his own - for limited periods of time but then either falls over or starts rolling. He needs us to be there to feed him (to keep him from rolling in the food) and sometimes I have to syringe feed him and sometimes he can sit and eat from a bowl. It depends upon how he's feeling at that particular feeding at that particular day.
I'm starting this blog today beacuse I've seen a change in New Hope and I'm not sure how to take the change - if it is good - or bad. I'm trying to think about it and prepare myself to accept it if it is for the worst.
You see - for the last few months - New Hope has been content to eat, sleep, poop and pee. Sometimes he'd be living with another sick buck and he loved to hump the other buck...and get groomed by the other buck and vice versa. That was before his last bad wry neck episiode.
Today he was fussing and fussing with his towel (which he hates) and I told him, "Go ahead and pee on the towel...I'll get you a new one..". One of the things I've learned is if he starts getting antsy and messing with his towel - he has to pee.
Well no - he was very upset. He kept looking at me and started to pull on my nightgown when I laid down next to him....so I went to pick him up and he quite literally peed all over me. I held him and laughed and laughed (I was about to wash the nightgown anyway)....and teased him about not being willing to pee on his towel - but being willing to pee on me. I reminded him that I'm the one who gives him water and pedialyte and all that good stuff....and that he should treat me nice.
Meanwhile - he snuggled into my nightgown for pets and attention and when I put him on the towel so I could get changed - he threw a fit. He kept chewing on his towel and tugging on it and trying to throw it at me or get it out from under him.
And you see - this is what is different about New Hope and has me concerned...the very fact that he is getting angry and upset.
When I think of someone being in the hospital - when they're at their worst....they're like he has been - not caring. But when they start to heal - they often get grumpy and complaining a lot.
But he's going beyond that and when he gets frustrated -its like he gives up. I'm afraid he's gonna decide that he's just not going to have a normal life and give up.
Its like - sometimes when he looks at me and I talk to him - I can see in his eyes that it is hitting him that he is going to be permamently disabled....that even though he's fought this before and done well....that this time its different. That his body is paying a price for all the times he's rolled and his little heart has pumped so fast and scared us so much. I'm afraid he's just going to give up on me....instead of learning he can have a different type of life and be content.
I have been trying to put him on the floor and let him get some exercise...and he does enjoy that some - till he gets frustrated and start rolling. Then he gets mad and finally just lays there and pouts.
I think I'm also really concerned today because he is barely touching his food - specifically his cheerios. He'll eat his baby food/pumpkin and he is drinking water. But he normally eats a LOT of cheerios at each feeding. (Breeders often use cheerios to help a rabbit that needs to keep weight on). Let me put it this way - he eats enough that I buy him his own bag of cheerios and keep it near him almost all the time so I can offer him some whenever I walk by or am sitting there reading a book.
And today he's barely touching them. I'm wondering if it is because this is a new bag and it is a different brand (I just now realized that) or what it is.
But he needs to eat....and if he gives up ... then he won't eat. And I'm scared that is what he's gonna do.
So my goal for right now - is to keep him eating...to keep him wanting to fight to live and get better...
And so this blog will be a way of recording memories I don't want to forget...for when he does pass and I need the comfort of this blog.
loads of nose rubs from me I am so happy for him.
