I may sound insane...

[LadyOnslaught]

There may be some people on here that believe in this and others that don't. I would like too but I'm not sure that I do until I can be proven. Does anyone believe in psychics and communicators? In February of this year my Dad was murdered. We have not been on good terms for a year as he met this woman who manipulated him and really changed him. I have a lot of guilt over not seeing him and I saw him for a few minutes two days before he was killed but we didn't talk. We were involved in a lawsuit to get some of my property back (I know it was the girlfriend's fault. He wouldn't have it in him to keep things from me). We didn't talk and later I wished I had written him a letter to give him that day telling him why we didn't get along anymore and that I loved him. Obviously I never got the chance.

I've seen someone but all I really want is 10 minutes to talk to my Dad again. I know it's not possible but I'm grasping for straws. He doesn't come to me in dreams and when he did it's not that it's bad...but they're not happy dreams. I've been having a lot of bad dreams too... I don't think they would qualify as nightmares but they're not happy dreams.

There has been a lot of chaos with his family and me since this happened as his brother's grief is more important than anyone else's and he thinks the world revolves around him.

As I said, I may sound insane but I thought it's something maybe I should look into. I had a lot of anger towards him for awhile afterward but now I just miss him. I break down crying and just want my dad. I'm 26 by the way but I did that when I was young and he would leave without me lol. I've blabbed long enough but wanted to see if anyone had any advice.

 

[Alexah]

I don't know that I have much advice, but I'm sorry things have been so difficult for you. And I'm sorry you lost your dad.

I don't think it is about whether or not we believe in psychics and mediums or not. And I don't know if it's about what you believe in either. I think it's more about what you need to do for yourself to find closure and healing. And if going to a psychic would help you to do that, then go for it. The most important thing is that you find what you need.

All I can say is that we're here for you if you need to talk, cry, ramble, or the like. And, no matter what, I'm certain that your dad knew you loved him. Again, I'm sorry for your loss and for your pain. You're in my thoughts today.

 

[LadyOnslaught]

Alexah wrote:

I don't know that I have much advice, but I'm sorry things have been so difficult for you. And I'm sorry you lost your dad.

I don't think it is about whether or not we believe in psychics and mediums or not. And I don't know if it's about what you believe in either. I think it's more about what you need to do for yourself to find closure and healing. And if going to a psychic would help you to do that, then go for it. The most important thing is that you find what you need.

All I can say is that we're here for you if you need to talk, cry, ramble, or the like. And, no matter what, I'm certain that your dad knew you loved him. Again, I'm sorry for your loss and for your pain. You're in my thoughts today.

Thank you very much . I think overall I've handled it all well but then I have those moments where I just really want to see him. I also haven't dealt with death hardly at all so this is all new to me. I did just lose my grandmother 2 weeks ago but she had cancer for 5 years and it was really a relief when she passed as she was very uncomfortable. I guess her death hasn't hit me as I don't feel much about it. We were very close when I was younger and until a few years ago really when she got sick a lot.

 

[pumpkinandwhiskersmom]

I'm so sorry that you've had to endure so much in such a short time. Alexah is absolutely right...it doesn't matter whether anyone else "believes" in psychics...it's what will bring you the most comfort at this most difficult time. I'm so glad that you shared with us here. That's what this forum is about...friends sharing joys, sorrows, fears, and feelings with those that care.

 

[Bo B Bunny]

I'm so sorry about your father. Was he doing some things that were bad? because now that he's gone, I'm sure he knows what he did and that you love him and feel bad..... you didn't deserve what you got from that situation so I know he's not got the feelings from here.... he's understood what happened more now.

As far as contacting him.... if you try too hard it's not going to happen. If you go to a psychic, you want to go to one that is reputible.... there are some (more than the real ones) that are really fakes.

I DO believe that some people have the gift of communication/and seeing things from the past, present and future they they have no knowledge of otherwise.

 

[Wabbitdad12]

All I can offer are my condolences. So sorry your Dad life ended so tragically.

 

[Luvmyzoocrew]

HA if you think it is insane then you will think i am a wacko,lol. I feel that when you cross over that there is so much to do on the other side so they dont always get a chance to "come back" to say good bye. You can always just talk to him in your own way and tell him everything that you wanted to tell him that you didnt get to tell him. Sometimes i think we need to just "let go" of our anger (easier said then done) with ourselves or with that person and let them go, hope that makes sense.



I had an uncle that i basically wrote off and had nothing to do with while he was here, he died and i had sssssssssooooooooooooo much guilt at the way that i treated him. After many many nights of crying and saying i am sorry, and hearing how he came to my sister in a dream i was still upset. Finally one day sitting in my living room i just "let go" i came to the conclusion that for my sanity sake i had to do what i had to do for me and couldnt be wrapped up in his life and addictions, i pushed him away to protect myself. And i feel that he knew, or at least knew after his death, and that he didnt hold it against me. Your situation will take time to deal with because your dad was taken so tragically but know that he is not mad or dissapointed in anyway at you, and even though you were not on talking terms he knows that you cared, and he knows the pain that you are going through dealing with this too. Like Bo said if you do go to someone for closure make sure they are reputable. As far as your dreams it could have to do with the stress that you are going through, the guilt of not being on good terms with him when he passed, so your dreams are going to manifest those fears. Try some meditation and clearing your head before bed.



Sylvia Brown has some good books if you want to try reading them, she has books about what happens on the other side and about meditation.



You are not nuts to want closure at all.



I too want to offer my condolences on the passing of your dad.

 

[myheart]

My oldest sister used to get "visits" from my mom after she died. I was a bit jealous since I am the youngest, andmom was supposed to have loved me best . My sister just told me that I had too much junk on my brain for her to visit with me.

Let go of the bad feelings, it might help him to come through, and allow you to live longer and happier. You can't saw sawdust.... (What is done, is done...)

myheart

 

[AngelnSnuffy]

I'm sorry to hear about what happened to your father, that's horrible. I know how you feel in the sense that you didn't talk to him for that length of time. I haven't spoken to mine in let's say about 11 years, maybe a little more and over his wife's pettiness:?.

I agree with Bo as far as making sure they're reputible, they are many fakes out there! Sylvia Browne is awesome and so are her books, I've read many of them as the subject interests me very much. There's also that other guy, James Van Praagh. He has a new book out (Ghosts Among Us) that explains how to try to contact loved ones who have crossed over, another good one to try. Here's the link to it if you'd like to read a bit about it:

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Ghosts-among-Us/James-Van-Praagh/e/9780061553394/?itm=1

 

[Luvmyzoocrew]

james van pruagh is another good one i have read two other of his books abo ut the other side.

Thanks Angelnsnuffy i am going to order that book now.

 

[juliew19673]

Oh sweetie thats a rough patch your in - but you are not alone... Been there with silly friends who became SO involved with BF's (I was one when I was young as were alot of my girlfriends - its all part of growing up and figuring out how to "juggle" life)..

As for your Father, I'm very sorry to hear of the bad blood you both had, I had a similiar experience. When my Father died we were "just" starting to get close (I was 33) and I had realized how "similiar" we really were and was so happy that he and I could talk -then he died.. I was devestated.. The rest of my family were just fine - I became a mess and had a hard time coping. One of the first things I did after all the arrangements had been made, furneral had been had, etc.. and I had made it back to my home (family lives in Oregon and I live in California) was to write him a letter ("Dear Dad"..). It ended up being about 4 pages and it really surprised me thatall of this hurt and anger came out of me, but in the end it really helped me put his/mine/our life together into perspective. I think perhaps if you get all your thoughts out of your head and onto paper, perhaps the "bad" dreams of your Father will stop; dreams are a way for your subconcious to "process" stress, feeling, thoughts - so if you don't deal with them your mind will do it for you.

As for wanting to contact your Dad - I wanted this to and would cry and cry for him to come "visit" me and you know what? He went and visited my 5 year old Nephew! Twice!!!!!!!

That really irked me! My Nephew would have the best dream where: "Grandpa came down and visited me last night and we played and he told me stories", etc... Needless to say this didn't help ME much... Then finally 8 months after he died I came down with a really bad flu/cold thing.. One saturday as I was passed out in my bed I had the best dream where he was sitting next to me and we were watching the NBA playoff on TV just having a grand time.. I woke up from the dream and I could SMELL him on my pillow!! It was the weirdest - happiest moment and after that my grieving really stopped.. To this day - some 10 years later, I always talk to him and it just seems that he is "there"..

I also saw a psychic that I had used before and he pegged my Dad to a "T" and said that Dad is on the other side and that he is usually around me when I watch sports on Sunday.. Mind you I don't watch Sports but I had always kept whatever sport is on TV on Sundays on as I clean - (usually try to find a golf game as that was his favorite) and it just always made me feel a little closer to him - so I was pretty shocked when this psychic confirmed this without my suggesting it to him.

So feel free to contact a pyschic, get a referral though if possible; and don't feel crazy - grief will make you feel every emotion under the sun. I definetly suggest writing him a letter now - you'd be surprised at what comes out of you. I still have that letter and read it from time to time.

I hope this long jumbled post will help - feel free to PM me if you need to Vent/cry/scream; been there so I know how you feel and will understand.

Best wishes - Julie and Baxter!

 

[pumpkinandwhiskersmom]

So, last night, I had my son bring my dad's rocking chair down to the "den" from the spare room, and when I saw it, I could see my dad sitting there, smiling at me....not a strong image, but kind of "in my mind's eye", and I talked to him, and could feel him there with me. I really do think it happens, and that when it does, there's a real peace that you haven't felt before. My brother died in September (almost 2 years ago), my dad died last April, and my mom died in January of this year. After my bro died,I was really worried about him....where he had gone, etc. About 2 or 3 days after he died, I got the overwhelming sense of his presence, and knew that he was ok. I haven't had that with my mom yet, but I know it will come when I'm ready to accept it. Don't think that it's weird or anything to want tocommunicate with your dad.....do what you need to do to help it happen. Thinking of you....Grace