How I skeered an elderly gent into peeing on himself..

[GoinBackToCali]

Got your attention, didn't I?

Let me regale you with tales of the last 28 hours of my life..

I am sitting at the stop light, with my husband (why I am sitting there with him is for another story) and we feel *tap* and hear *THWAP*..I look in the rear view and see nothing. I then see a tiny grey head pop up from behind my truck.

Holy Crap Batman! We both hop out and I take the lead.. I am in NO MOOD!

There is nothing worse than a beligerent elderly man...

*Git back in yer truck lil lady, I didn't hit your truck*

(First off I never said he did, I hadn't said a word.. YET...)

*Well.. sir.. clearly you are blind.. because I am by far.. NOT little.. and I would say my frickin HITCH jammed UP your PLASTIC bumper would indicate you in fact DID hit my truck*

So he gets all insistant that he did not hit my truck. Well he's right. He didn't.. he hit myhitch. But my hitch is firmly imbedded in his ABS Plastic bumper, license plate folded in half...

By this time.. he's just tickin me off..

I don't really think about the fact that I am 6ft3 and he's around 5ft5 or so, and im like a foot or so from him telling him there's a reason we didn't let my daddy drive and if he can't see my freakin hitch in his bumper, then clearly he does NOT need to be behind the wheel. Rick starts goin *Carroll-Marie'.. git in tha truck.. git in tha truck right NOW... *why?* just git in that truck... *WHY?*.... JUST SHUTUP AND GIT IN THA TRUCK* .. so.. I look down.. and the mans leg is shakin... and .. he peed on himself.

I felt TERRIBLE!!

Rick and the guy worked it out..and I had to hear a lecture about me respecting personal spaceand being intimidating for like the next 10 miles. I wasn't the one jammin my car up onto somebody's bumper dewd... so save it..

Christian made himself some ramen noodles.. he didn't want me or Blake to fix them for him...but asked all the pertinent questions as to how to fix them in the microwave. So we detailed them all... save for one...I mean, I just assumed he knew the noodle juice came from water.. not condensation or something...

So there's a melted bowl of burned ramen noodles smoking on the back porch...Christian didn't add water, it started a small fire in the microwave, filled the house with smoke. The rabbits were screaming for gas masks, and we all smell like a refinery now..

I spent the rest of the day lounging in the pool with the boys, Blake removed Christian's swimsuit and threw it outside the pool.. to which Christian refused to get out and get it.. thankfully. So Christian commenced to beating on him, and Blake just TOOK IT.. which is totally unlike Blake. I asked him why.. his retort.. *because I ain't fightin' a nekkid dude.*

Such great logic... all those ill spent youthful days squabbling and fighting over trivial stuff, when I coulda simply been nekkid and nobody woulda wanted to kick my butt..

I wish I woulda thoughta that.

Christian got all his hair cut off into a psuedo mohawkish thing like Chester from Linkin Park.. and got his ear pierced with a hoop.. so he think's he's unbeleivably gorgeous for a 10 year old now, which is competing in the ego fest with cowboy Blake the 15 year old..

Kill me now..

Tommorrow I meet Peg in Seguin for a rabbit pickup.. hopefully there won't be any old men wedged up the hind end of my truck...

 

[BlueGiants]

:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:



Zin, you gotta stopintimidating lil ol men in the street!

:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:

OMG! That was funny!

 

[polly]

Seriously Zin you should write a book, Your posts crack me up

 

[Michaela]

Only you Zin! Can't believe you made a little old man wet himself! :laughsmiley::laughsmiley::laughsmiley:

 

[seniorcats]

GoinBackToCali wrote:

Tommorrow I meet Peg in Seguin for a rabbit pickup.. hopefully there won't be any old men wedged up the hind end of my truck...

It's probably the biggest thrill he's had in years. Keep checking your rear view mirror for a tiny damp troll. He may decide to stalk you for some added excitement.

 

[cheryl]

seniorcats wrote:

GoinBackToCali wrote:

Tommorrow I meet Peg in Seguin for a rabbit pickup.. hopefully there won't be any old men wedged up the hind end of my truck...

It's probably the biggest thrill he's had in years. Keep checking your rear view mirror for a tiny damp troll. He may decide to stalk you for some added excitement.

LOL!!...that's to funny



Zin your post made me laugh

 

[JadeIcing]

Oh god that made me laugh.

 

[mouse_chalk]

Oh my LOL..... this cracked me up!

The little old man peeing himself is HILLARIOUS, I don't know why....

So is the 'rabbits were screaming for gas masks' lol..... your posts make me laugh so much!!

:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:

 

[FallingStar]

:roflmao:

Oh my! I can't stop laughing!

 

[maisy126]

Add my laughing smiley to the list as well lol



:roflmao:

 

[LadyBug]

i know i really shouldn't be laughing at all that, but...................................

:roflmao:

these two lines got me the most-

The rabbits were screaming for gas masks

and

.. so he think's he's unbelievably gorgeous for a 10 year old now, which is competing in the ego fest with cowboy Blake the 15 year old..


boy do i know about that! plenty of little(and not so little)boys at church have gotten swollen egos recently, it's enough to make you gag!

 

[Elf Mommy]

I had to pause on this page and wait until the end of my husband's birthday phone call with his mom, stepdad, brother and nephew....JUST so I could read this post aloud to him. I was laughing too hard!

 

[Bo B Bunny]

Oh Zin! You meanie!

 

[AngelnSnuffy]

And...of course this crap ONLY happens to you! LOL!

 

[undergunfire]

I think I just peed myself laughing at the old man peeing himself.

 

[pumpkinandwhiskersmom]

That'll teach the old geezer....right, little lady??? :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao: