He always makes me laugh

[JAK Rabbitry]

I like to help other people laugh. Anyone everheard of Dimitri Martin? He's a newer stand up dude. He's a lot likeMitch Hedberg if you were into him. He tells those 1-2 line shortstupid jokes. Things like:

"Every fight is a food fight when you're a cannibal"
"To me swimming is a confusing sport....because sometiems you do it forfun...and other tiems you do it to not die. I kinda have to go by theoutfit. I look down...pants....uh oh. Ok bathing suit....yeah ok thisis cool. Naked......we'll see..."
"I think they named oranges BEFORE They named Carrots. 'what are these'' orange....oranges.' ' oh, then what are these?''darn.....uh....long pointies..."
"I bought this stuff that makes my toilet water blue. It's calledblueberry popsicles. You have to eat a lot of them but it DOES work."
"I just bought these new pajamas with pockets. Its great, because now I don't have to hold stuff while I sleep"
"I went to a store to tryon clothes and the lady got mad at me. She said ''what size are you?" and I said 'actual'' ''
"Then I went intot he dressing room and she said 'If yuo need anything,i'm Jill' I thought wow, I'd never met anyone with a conditionalidentity crisis before. Who are you if I don't need anything?'' '' I'mkevin''
"I want to go to the beach and bury a bunch of metallic objects that say 'Get a Life' on them' '

I thought some people might enjoy those.

Due to some extremely mild lanuage, I'm not posting the videos but if it doens't bother you, i'll be happy to post links later.


Peace Out
Happy Xmas
-JAK

 

[maherwoman]

OH, those are just the BEST...I have to see more stuff of his!

Got my husband crackin' up, too!!

 

[m.e.]

JAK Rabbitry wrote:

"Every fight is a food fight when you're a cannibal"

:lol

 

[pinksalamander]

I like the last one! I migh actually do that

 

[JAK Rabbitry]

What's ironic is, Haha if you actualyl did that,there's plenty of people who would tell yout o get a life for wasitingyour time burying metalic objects on the beach. If you hung around witha video camer though for when they found them....then it'd be worth it.

 

[maherwoman]

HA!! Too true, JAK, too true...

I would LOVE to see that!

 

[maherwoman]

P.S. Where can I find some videos of his stuff??

 

[JAK Rabbitry]

When I become a millionaire....just so youknow....i'm flying us all out to the beach...and we're goign to burymetallic objects together. Dimitri also had another suggestion.

"I like the beach. I like to go really early, before anyone gets there.And I like to take all these bottles and throw like 30 of them out intothe ocean, and then I wait for the people to show up. And I'll watchpeople pick the bottles out of the surf, and i'll go stand behind them.Because inside the bottle....is a note that says 'i'm standing rightbehind you' ''

I hate the beach. But this would make it worthwhile.

 

[maherwoman]

Hehe!! I love that!!

 

[JAK Rabbitry]

We're such losers.

"Duh you guys lets listen to stand up comedians and get ideas for hobbies. "

 

[maherwoman]

I know, right? What doofs!!

 

[JAK Rabbitry]

"I went to the store to buy a candle holder. And they didn't have any. So I bought a cake."

"I like escalators. Because they can't really break. They just become stairs."

"I like to wear a necklace. So I know when i'm upside down."

"When I have the tv up too loud, my neighbor likes to bang on the wallbetween us to tell me to quiet down. I like to mess with him and saythings like ' GO AROUND! There is NO door on this side...' "

-Mitch Hedberg.