Doing something special for your significant other

[Ivory]

So, I've been having really bad problems the last few weeks...my depression has decided to rear its ugly head. My boyfriend has taken wonderful care of me these last two weeks.

I want to do something extra special for him. I've baked him a cookie cake (from scratch!) but I think there's more that I can do.

Sooooooooo....any suggestions?

 

[Ivory]

LOL I've no idea why I posted that in the rabbit forum....I moved it

 

[JadeIcing]

How about a list of some of his awesome qualities?

 

[Elf Mommy]

[align=center]Write him a love letter?[/align]
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[TinysMom]

What is his love language?

In other words -what does he like for you to do to show him he's loved?

From: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gary_Chapman_(author)

He is perhaps best known for his concept of "love languages," which posits that every person feels most loved when love is expressed through one of five modes: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, or physical touch. Chapman argues that while each of these modes is enjoyed to some degree by all people, a person will usually prioritize one mode (sometimes two) over the others and will not feel as loved if the loving they receive is not expressed in that specific "language." For example, a woman who strongly prefers Quality Time should feel more loved by spending time with her husband at a dinner out than she will by the ruby pendant he gives her while there.
The first of many books promoting the above concept was The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate, first published in 1992. The book has sold over 4.2 million copies in English — having been translated into 35 other languages[1][/sup] — and the 1996 edition consistently ranks in the top 100 sellers on Amazon.com, ranking in the top 50 as of February, 2007. The Men's Edition came out in 2004.




My favorite way is either receiving gifts (small gifts) or acts of service. Art loves to receive "love" by acts of touch - like if I ruffle his hair as I go by his desk....



Anyway - think about what he has seemed to enjoy the most in the past...and then maybe do something along those lines?


Not much help..right?

 

[Elf Mommy]

I absolutely LOVE that book! One of my good friends loaned it to me, and I've passed it on over and over again.

Minda

 

[TinysMom]

Elf Mommy wrote:

I absolutely LOVE that book! One of my good friends loaned it to me, and I've passed it on over and over again.

Minda

Its hard for me because touch is NOT my thing at all....and of course - that is the way Art appreciates it most (I'm talking about simple things like running my hands through his hair or putting my arm around his waist).

When our relationship is good - these things come much more naturally than when things are bad - which is of course when I need to do these things the most.

What made me think about it was because Robin was asking me just last night or the night before - which ways I prefer to receive expressions of love...

 

[NZminilops]

I don't have any advice, just wanted to say that I loved what Peg posted, that was so interesting!

With Mathew and I there are major differences to how we prefer to give and recieve love or attention so this was very interesting for me to read, I should go find that book. I find him a bit hard to understand sometimes and it might help me. I like to give and recieve love with words and touch, but he's not like that, he feels that I love hiim when I take his advice and just do sensible things that he thinks will help our relationship.

I think a lot of it depends on how confident your partner is, about whether you love them or not, Mat is always supremely confident about how I feel about him so doesn't need or want to be told, whereas I am incredibly insecure and need to be told a lot.

 

[Ivory]

I begin to feel bad. We're in a rough patch right now and I know it's partly because of me...we're under a lot of stress between the two of us, and I'm dealing with fiftymillionbillion things. It seems though that these last few weeks we haven't been granted any kind of rest from these problems....we keep trying and trying. For instance, I am not a patient person...and I have been trying really hard to improve my patience for things...

Basically, I can describe it like this....Andre' takes lots of baby steps....LOTS OF BABY STEPS...never goes back, but just keeps taking little steps, and is always moving. I, on the other hand, am generally sitting still, figuring out exactly what to do...and once I've got it figured out, I'm all leaps and bounds. So I get exasperated when I'm leaping and bounding and he's still taking his baby steps.

We're just learning, after all...we're still pretty new, we're going to be a year in November.

Sometimes I just think I'm thinking too much. I love him very much.

At any rate....about the love language. Andre' likes to be touched- he likes massages. Back rubs, leg rubs, arm rubs, etc. He also likes quality time. He likes it when I bake things for him and do things that obviously required love and caring.

Personally I like receiving gifts and quality time, with back rubs ranking pretty high on the list, too!

 

[JadeIcing]

How about make a coupon book for massages and things like that.

 

[slavetoabunny]

How about an elaborate romantic dinner - candles, wine, and all that? Maybe followed by a massage or pedicure. My husband melts when I give him a pedicure.

 

[Ivory]

I do believe you'll have to instruct me on how to give a pedicure. I wonder if he'd like that. That sounds kind of fun, or at least interesting to try.

I've already got some lemon cupcakes on the way for him.

I'm sad though, the roses he bought me are wilting and I'm gonna have to throw them away.

 

[Leaf]

Ivory wrote:

I'm sad though, the roses he bought me are wilting and I'm gonna have to throw them away.

You can stick cut roses into the ground (stem) and put a glass jar over them (push the jar into the ground a ways) to make a small green house for the cut roses.

I've always had a very high success rate of raising rose bush starts using that method (knowledge passed on from my Oma)

You can "green house" them over winter and release them after all frost possibilities are past the following spring.

 

[slavetoabunny]

Ivory wrote:

I do believe you'll have to instruct me on how to give a pedicure. I wonder if he'd like that. That sounds kind of fun, or at least interesting to try.

I've already got some lemon cupcakes on the way for him.

I'm sad though, the roses he bought me are wilting and I'm gonna have to throw them away.

Here is a basic description of a pedicure:

http://www.essortment.com/all/pedicuremanicur_rcgf.htm

You can probably skip the polish part.

If Andre likes to be touched, I guarantee he will love a pedicure!