Advice for difficult bond?

[InkFallIng]

Hey all, first time poster here, so please bear with me.

I adopted my bunny Loaf some two or so years back, and after about a year, decided that I should get a bondmate for him. As such, I headed to my local HRS and after a bit of speed dating, picked out a rabbit (Toast) to bond with. I started out with a week or two of stress bonding, which seemed to go alright. After that we moved to the bathtub. Toast mounted like crazy, but Loaf seemed to accept it and after the sessions became “boring,” I decided to move them to a small pen on the carpet. Although there were a few rough patches, things seemed to go well enough and once again, got boring. So I decided to upgrade the bonding area again--and this is where I'm stuck.

I currently have them together in an area about the size of their pens (~2x4). I've been bonding for literally months and months, and they still don't seem to be making any progress. I thought I might’ve had a breakthrough recently, as they started cuddling, but they haven't done it much since. They get along fine, munching on the hay I put out, occasionally grooming one another, and sometimes lying down together. Until, that is, one of them (usually Toast) tries to mount. The other will immediately run away (the mounter will often follow for several seconds before giving up) and usually remains wary for several minutes (this will often happen a couple times per session). I'm just at a loss of what to do--they just can't seem to work out dominance, no matter how much time they're given. What should I do?

(As a side note, after every session I have done cage switching.)

I know some people might suggest that I return Toast to the shelter and try with another rabbit, but by this point I just can't see myself doing that. I've had him for too long to just give him away, you know? I'm actually getting a bit emotional just thinking about it haha

I’d also like to stress that they do not fight--the two get along perfectly well until one tries to be dominant. There’ve been maybe three instances of fighting, and those were all very early on in the bonding process and were broken up right away. There is occasional chasing, but like I said, the chaser usually gives up very quickly.

More details for both rabbits:
Toast: male, ~4 lbs, fixed, 2 yrs old. Almost always the one who tries to mount.
Loaf: male, ~3 lbs, fixed, 3 yrs old. Will only occasionally try to mount.

 

[Imbrium]

Hmm, that's a tough one. I wonder if maybe the cage-swapping is actually causing some trouble. It's possible that you're switching so frequently, neither is getting to settle in and feel like they're at "home" in either cage, causing them to be a little competitive about territory. Maybe you could try reducing the switching to once a week?

Also, how long do the bonding sessions last? I've bonded both duos and a trio in the past and usually when things start getting pretty good (which, honestly, is the point you seem to be at if they never get nippy over the humping), I get impatient and wrap things up with a "marathon" bonding session. That means the rabbits being bonded in an x-pen in the same room with me for probably 6-8 hours, followed by being moved into a "new" condo (or neutral pen area).

Sometimes even bonded rabbits get the urge to hump about dominance once in a while (and same-sex bonds can be a little more prone to bumps in the road, some of which require you to intervene and help them mend the bond). If they can go 6-8+ hours without ever escalating to a fight, they're probably as ready as they'll ever be to move in together.

 

[cwebster]

Have been following these posts with interest because i am trying to bond a spayed female and neutered male bunny. They were doing great with scent swapped toys and changing outdoor playpens back and forth set right next to each other for over a week. But today Duchess bit Arnold’s foot while they were going nose to nose and he had his feet near her. She didnt break the skin but i am sure it hurt. Maybe as you mentioned we should just switch them in the playpens less often and not every day.

 

[InkFallIng]

Oh, I didn't know that about cage switching! Makes sense; I can easily reduce how often I switch them.

At this point, sessions are usually a few hours. I try to average about three, but if it seems to be going especially well (ie they're cuddling, lying near each other, grooming, etc) I'll keep going for a few more. I've definitely considered moving them into together, but I've read about incidences where dominance wasn't fully worked out beforehand and the rabbits ended up in serious fights days later. Being a first time bonder, I'm not confident in saying "yes, they're bonded now", and I didn't want to potentially ruin the progress they've made by moving them in together too soon ^^;

So it's not a concern if Loaf tries to mount every now and again?

I'm thinking I might give it another month or two with reduced switching, and then trying to move them in together

 

[Blue eyes]

I'm thinking I might give it another month or two with reduced switching, and then trying to move them in together

You'll want to either have a new cage or do your best to neutralize an existing one. You don't want either of them to think that the cage is theirs and they need to defend it.

 

[JBun]

It could be this is being dragged out too long and this is why you are continuing to have issues. The constant separation each day can be disrupting to the progress they are making and being able to move on to being together permanently. Continued separation after dates can have the opposite affect of what you want sometimes. For some rabbits it can cause them to forget the progress they made the previous day, and essentially they go back to square one each day without making much or any progress in actually working out their relationship and hierarchy issues,so the bonding doesn't progress. In these cases fast track bonding is sometimes what is needed for some rabbits.

Fast track bonding is where you put the rabbits together and keep them together until bonded, while you closely monitor and supervise. Which can mean you staying up the next night or two to make sure no fights break out, the bonding progresses as desired, and nothing bad happens. Only you can determine if this is the direction you need to go now though. I explain it in these threads and include a link of info on the process.
https://www.rabbitsonline.net/threads/bonding-troubles.93158/#post-1104702
https://www.rabbitsonline.net/threads/still-having-bonding-troubles.93295/#post-1105502